Reviews from

Little Billy

Viewing comments for Chapter 4 " Im Waiting......."
memiors from my life experiences.

59 total reviews 
Comment from edgey54
Excellent
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Well written and thought out. The flow and words went together.You emphasized the meaning. The way I looked at it there was no mistakes. Well done. Kenny

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    thank you
Comment from dportwood
Excellent
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keimosobie,

That you accepted the challenge of writing a villanelle is admirable. The repetition of rhyming scheme makes it a less-than-easy type of poetry to write. Very well done.

Duane

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    thank you
Comment from katz meow
Excellent
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This well structured Villanelle presents itself in a dark manner. It also delivers a poignant message. Thanks for sharing this enjoyable read, that's also an excellent write...katz meow

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    thank you katz
Comment from afternoonlight
Excellent
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I like everything about this writing. The rhyme, the repeating, the alternating lines, the subject handled poetically, dramatically. Awesome write.

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    thank you
Comment from Amina Ahmed
Excellent
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a very nice poem . i like the end:
All of your kings that are so royal.
Will beg for mercy under my scythe.
Stir the pot it's going to boil
What will you do when the earth's out of oil?
keep it up



 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    thanks.
Comment from Fireshadow
Excellent
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Billy, this is a perfectly structured villanelle poem with great imagery to present a rather dark theme. Perfect artwork presentation. I don't understand how the title relates to the actual poem, though. Could you please explain ? Very well penned writing, my friend. Amarillys

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    The grim reaper is waiting for the oil to run out. Supposed to be him telling the poem. Thank you for the review.
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Excellent
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Hi keimosobie

Interesting theme and an interesting form for this. It conveys your message very well. Good rhythm and a good flow to the words.

Patrick

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    Thank you
Comment from LadyCosgrove
Excellent
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An excellent example of villanelle that depicts a very poignant and current subject.

Well written and well delivered. :o)

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    Thanks
Comment from DecrepitOldBag
Excellent
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Excellent villanelle. I really like the two refrains 'stir the pot it's going to boil' and 'what will you do when the earth's out of oil'. Great writing, superb rhythm too. No faults to pick at a nice write with vivid imagery.

Warm wishes
Kat

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    thank you
Comment from R. K. Alan
Excellent
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Loved the deep dark story line. Unfortunately, I think we all know the answer to your question. Well crafted and well presented. Loved the image. Ray aka Krlyon

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2010

reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
    thank you