Living On The Edge
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Living On The Edge - Chap 3"The blending of good and evil.
23 total reviews
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is a very good chapter. I'm curious about who set Alyssa up a the restaurant. Maybe nobody, but I believe possibly Richard. I can't wait to read more.
Troy sighed, "A mixture of mother nature at her best and Godzilla (sighed.)
Penny grinned, "Holding out on me, are you? (grinned)
Alyssa nodded, "Thank you. (nodded.)
He stepped around her, nodded, and headed toward the elevator, making a mental note to give this delivery to someone else next time. (We're in Alyssa frame of mind, how would she know what the delivery boy is thinking?)
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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This is a very good chapter. I'm curious about who set Alyssa up a the restaurant. Maybe nobody, but I believe possibly Richard. I can't wait to read more.
Troy sighed, "A mixture of mother nature at her best and Godzilla (sighed.)
Penny grinned, "Holding out on me, are you? (grinned)
Alyssa nodded, "Thank you. (nodded.)
He stepped around her, nodded, and headed toward the elevator, making a mental note to give this delivery to someone else next time. (We're in Alyssa frame of mind, how would she know what the delivery boy is thinking?)
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Can't slip anything past the teacher, now can I? I've corrected three out of the four. I'm deciding what I need to do with the pizza boy.
As always, I thank you for your assistance and for reading. Just posted #4 and it's got a few extra cents. Earned 4 pumps while reading so I gave them away.
Smiles, Carol
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I just read it. It's great.
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Thank you....
Comment from Ulla
Hi Carol, this is another great chapter and the story is moving at pace. I certainly hope you can keep it up until you have to go away. Not to worry, though. I will be here following along. I'm intrigued. Ulla xcx
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Hi Carol, this is another great chapter and the story is moving at pace. I certainly hope you can keep it up until you have to go away. Not to worry, though. I will be here following along. I'm intrigued. Ulla xcx
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Wow! You covered the ending of one book and three chapters of the other...Awesome! I so appreciate it. Have a great day!
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Teri7
Carol, This is a really great chapter. You used great descriptive words and very good imagery from your words. It was full of excitement. love and blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Carol, This is a really great chapter. You used great descriptive words and very good imagery from your words. It was full of excitement. love and blessings, Teri
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Thank you so much, Teri. I am thrilled you are enjoying the story. I just hope I can find 30,000 words in this month.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Ric Myworld
Great job of descriptive details and building tension; and then, leaving this reader wondering who might have fired the shot, Alyssa or maybe someone else.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Great job of descriptive details and building tension; and then, leaving this reader wondering who might have fired the shot, Alyssa or maybe someone else.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Chapter 4 is posted but the shooter is still at large.... I think we've got bigger fish to fry and more explosions coming soon.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from patcelaw
This chapter for the book is very well written, and I enjoyed listening to it very much your sentence structure and your paragraphing is excellent. I wish you the very best with your book and also with all of your writing may God richly bless you. Patricia .
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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This chapter for the book is very well written, and I enjoyed listening to it very much your sentence structure and your paragraphing is excellent. I wish you the very best with your book and also with all of your writing may God richly bless you. Patricia .
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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thank you for your kindness, Patricia. I am glad that you are enjoying the new book. I am about to post Chap 4 after I check for errors. Hope you enjoy it.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Esther Brown
All right. It is not fair. You left me hanging and suspicious of everyone except Penny.....
Have fun in NC. I spent Christmas there with my friend (whose Jam I ate).
Esther
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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All right. It is not fair. You left me hanging and suspicious of everyone except Penny.....
Have fun in NC. I spent Christmas there with my friend (whose Jam I ate).
Esther
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Good day, Esther. Chapter 4 is nearly finished and I will post it today. So happy that you are loving the story. Makes my heart sing!!! LOL
I'd left FS and was in a dark spot for a long time. The first of the year I came back, wondering if I could ever write again. Here I am and people are loving it. Me too!
Thanks so much for reading, reviewing, and enjoying.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from karenina
The length was fine! With all this action the words go flying by!
Superb writing.
So, junior sleuth here (me) want to know if neither Sammy nor Jake had any part in the shooting, HOW did they know he was shot at his apartment?
("We've got trouble. Troy's been shot."
Immediately, Sammy responded, "I'm on it. We'll have the van in the alley in fifteen."
"I'll meet you there." A block away, Jake shut off the lights and drove into the alley, leaving room for the van. He unlocked his glove compartment and retrieved his gun. He entered through the rear)
Hmmmm.
They both seem to assume the location of the shooting (even though he was supposed to be dining out.)
You're going to spring something on us, aren't you!?
Clever writer!
Karenina
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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The length was fine! With all this action the words go flying by!
Superb writing.
So, junior sleuth here (me) want to know if neither Sammy nor Jake had any part in the shooting, HOW did they know he was shot at his apartment?
("We've got trouble. Troy's been shot."
Immediately, Sammy responded, "I'm on it. We'll have the van in the alley in fifteen."
"I'll meet you there." A block away, Jake shut off the lights and drove into the alley, leaving room for the van. He unlocked his glove compartment and retrieved his gun. He entered through the rear)
Hmmmm.
They both seem to assume the location of the shooting (even though he was supposed to be dining out.)
You're going to spring something on us, aren't you!?
Clever writer!
Karenina
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Inside scoop...and maybe I need to clarify a bit. Jake (a childhood friend and the voice on the phone) is the stranger having dinner with Troy. Sammy, Frankie and Jake all grew up in the same hood. So everyone of them knew Troy was living at the penthouse. But I think you are right...I should at least say that's where he's at. It could have happened anywhere.
Maybe I should add "He's at the penthouse" or "I'm headed to the penthouse." What's your thoughts? It does get explained further in the next chapter...but I see exactly what you are saying.
Smiles, Carol
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I'd identify the place of the shooting...
Even...."Get to the penthouse--Troy's been shot"
Just my take...
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I agree! Thanks for keeping me on my toes. Hugs, Carol
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Oh, you're always on your toes!
:)
Comment from Terry Broxson
Carol, no problem with the length. You have created more mystery in Alyssa's and Troy's life. Your pace is excellent, and your character development is well done. Looking forward to the rest. Terry.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Carol, no problem with the length. You have created more mystery in Alyssa's and Troy's life. Your pace is excellent, and your character development is well done. Looking forward to the rest. Terry.
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Thanks, Terry. I usually try to stay under 2000...I know many of the readers prefer about 1200, but I choose my word count by the cliff hangers. LOL This story has a few more demands on me. I'm glad that you are finding interest in it and I hope I can keep you on the edge.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from BethShelby
Nicely written but I'm a little confused. Jake is Troy's friend who has set him up in this penthouse but Sammy is the right hand man of a mob boss. Why is Jake calling him? I am assuming what has happened in the past will be revealed as in later chapters.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Nicely written but I'm a little confused. Jake is Troy's friend who has set him up in this penthouse but Sammy is the right hand man of a mob boss. Why is Jake calling him? I am assuming what has happened in the past will be revealed as in later chapters.
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Here's another piece of dirt for you to digest...LOL
Frankie owns the penthouse.... and Jake's a cop. Now how does that mess with your thoughts? LOL You're not confused...I just haven't let you in on everything yet. Yes, it's that darn past that catches up with everyone.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Wendy G
This is high drama already and the month has only just started. You very clearly portrayed the actions, and various emotions of your characters, and I was holding my breath till the end, because it was so real, and the characters so authentic. Most compelling read.
Wendy
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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This is high drama already and the month has only just started. You very clearly portrayed the actions, and various emotions of your characters, and I was holding my breath till the end, because it was so real, and the characters so authentic. Most compelling read.
Wendy
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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You started my day off with a bang! Thank you so much, Wendy. I wasn't sure I could build enough tension especially with Troy's shooting. I appreciate your kindness and the stars. Thank you.
Smiles, Carol
