Reviews from

Coffee With Iris

Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Jokes"
Two opposites meet and connect.

21 total reviews 
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A very sensitively written chapter and both characters are learning and growing from their simple beautiful and caring relationship. I am enjoying this story a lot. Despite the probable sad ending to come.
Wendy
Typos: "I hug her tightly as the realisation ... " (at the realisation or "as I realise ...")
" She lets me put Finn to bed". "Let's" means " let us". Here , you just need " lets".

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 13-Aug-2023
    I post from my phone and I forget auto correct likes to mess things up. I try to keep up but I missed let's. See, just changed it. Ugh. Thank you for this. Gretchen
reply by Wendy G on 13-Aug-2023
    Autocorrect on my phone tried to correct my correction! Lol. You post on your phone? That?s hard for lengthy pieces.
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent
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A touching chapter, rich in content. Their need for each other was evidenced in this segment. I made a few notes you may want to look at.

"Well, thanks," Claire says, she won't look me in the eye, instead she glances towards the door. [You need a full stop, or at least a semicolon after "says"]

I hug her tightly as the realization that our coffee days are coming to an end. [Take a look at this sentence, Gretchen. It just doesn't look right. To me, the "as" works as a transition into a reason WHY their coffee days are coming to an end. To me, the missing content to finish the thought might be two words, "sets in" inserted after "realization".]

It seems pretty evident that Iris is getting near the end.

Jay




 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    Ok, good. Thanks for the help. Someone else was thrown by the sentence about the hug. I will go back and look at it. I appreciate the help. Gretchen
Comment from damommy
Excellent
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I hope this story ends before Iris dies. I can't take anymore sadness. It will be a blow for Jameson, but she came into his life at the right time, and gave him the guidance he needed.

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    Uh oh. You may want to stop reading. Lol. No promises on when she dies. But thank you for this. Gretchen
reply by damommy on 12-Aug-2023
    Thanks for the heads up. I'm sorry to miss out on such a wonderful story, but I never read anything sad these days. Thank you for understanding.
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    It does have a happy ending. I had a friend read to the end and she said it wasn't depressing. Just a story of life. Not trying to change your mind just wanted to tell you. Gretchen
reply by damommy on 13-Aug-2023
    Thank you for going to so much trouble for me. I will certainly read on.
Comment from jmdg1954
Excellent
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He has come to the realization now that he's met Iris that family and friends are cherished!

I have done strange feelings about how we are going to lose Iris. I hope that it's many posts away.

Sad and funny chapter. Nice writing, Gretchen

Cheers to coffee with friends...
John

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    Might not be as dramatic as you'd think. Iris is a very private person. I have a feeling she'll be that way in death as well. Thanks for this. Gretchen
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
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You have these characters worked out so completely that they all work together to make this story real and honest Gretchen. Claire has her own life and cares nothing for Jameson, yet he is kind and caring and also feels a little hurt. Iris is strong, yet also gentle and vulnerable just now. I dare say this will all reach a climax in the end and I know you will handle is all with finesse, a fine story, love Dolly x x x

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    Thanks, Dolly. You understand both of them. Thanks so much for your review. Gretchen
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
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At this point in his life Jameson does have all he needs, and yes Iris taught him that. He knows Iris's days are numbered but I'm worried about him when she dies. I like this story.

I help her with her chair and sit down across from her since there is nothing I (omit 'down')

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    Thank you. I'll go in and fix that. So glad you like this. Gretchen
Comment from Sankey
Excellent
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Another lovely, emotional kind of read. Just one suggestion below. I step back on the [curb] this spelling means to curb or cease or cut back on something. Is there a "kerb" spelling in USA or the kerb on the road?

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    That's how we spell it here. Curb. Thanks for this. Gretchen
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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We could all learn from this chapter, Gretchen. We should all enjoy what time we have, as time is something no one can own. I would have stopped it years ago if I could. I fear there is not many more chapters for Iris, her last pages are rapidly coming to an end. It will hit Jameson hard, she has become someone very important in his life.

I don't know if it will happen, only you do, but I wonder if Claire will suddenly change her mind about leaving him when she learns of his inheritance. I hope she doesn't because he will know it isn't him she wants, but what he's got. I love this story and look forward to the next chapter. Love and hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    Thank you. I think Iris has that covered. She has a meeting with her attorney, Mitchell next chapter. I'm so happy you are enjoying this. Gretchen
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is another fine chapter, tightly written and with interesting content. Thanks for sharing, kay
as the realization that our coffee days > as I realize that our coffee days

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    Thanks so much for helping with that.spag suggestion. I really appreciate it. Gretchen
Comment from royowen
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I can't remember you saying that Jameson had relatives, parents etc. I know that I always had siblings and reasonably close friends, and actually I was never alone in times of stress. But finding someone you relate to, and then losing them would be a tragic thing. Iris is the counselling grandparent all children should have. Well done Gretchen, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 12-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
    I've never really mentioned his family. Just that his mother gave him a leather bound journal several years ago. Thank you so much for this awesome review and the extra star. Gretchen
reply by royowen on 12-Aug-2023
    Well done