Quiet Lawyer
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "The Quiet Lawyer Chapter 1"Can a broken heart be mended?
30 total reviews
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
This is a wonderful start to your new novel. I love reading stories where men are men and in your story that man just happens to be a 'gentleman'. Your story has all kinds of possibilities going forward, and I hope to be reading more.
Wonderful characters and setting. Love Sampson.
A minor correction is needed, 'Chuckling, he continued, "To be honest either have I' - change to 'neither'.
Great read!
Gale
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2022
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This is a wonderful start to your new novel. I love reading stories where men are men and in your story that man just happens to be a 'gentleman'. Your story has all kinds of possibilities going forward, and I hope to be reading more.
Wonderful characters and setting. Love Sampson.
A minor correction is needed, 'Chuckling, he continued, "To be honest either have I' - change to 'neither'.
Great read!
Gale
Comment Written 09-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2022
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Thank you for the catch. I've fixed it. I appreciate the review and the help.
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You are so welcome.
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello Barbara!
Glad I got in on your first chapter! I enjoyed the read!
Below are a few nits I found: easy fixes!
***I know it's too big, but it's the one I had easiest access too. (to).
***Evidentially, (Evidently) changing what you're called has something to do with that relationship. I'm sorry."
***"To be honest either (neither) have I, but it sounds like an okay idea. We'll have separate spoons."
Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2022
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Hello Barbara!
Glad I got in on your first chapter! I enjoyed the read!
Below are a few nits I found: easy fixes!
***I know it's too big, but it's the one I had easiest access too. (to).
***Evidentially, (Evidently) changing what you're called has something to do with that relationship. I'm sorry."
***"To be honest either (neither) have I, but it sounds like an okay idea. We'll have separate spoons."
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 09-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2022
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I have made the changes. I absolutely appreciate the help.
Comment from nomi338
I love romance novels. This is one of the main reason I love the "Football" story so much. This story is coming from a different direction, but the promise for me, seems to be potentially be just as much of a satisfaction as the other. I at first was petrified that you had completed the "Football" story and I had somehow missed it. When I realized that you had not finished the "Football" story yet, I was able to continue breathing.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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I love romance novels. This is one of the main reason I love the "Football" story so much. This story is coming from a different direction, but the promise for me, seems to be potentially be just as much of a satisfaction as the other. I at first was petrified that you had completed the "Football" story and I had somehow missed it. When I realized that you had not finished the "Football" story yet, I was able to continue breathing.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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No it's not finished and I will post it until the end, whatever that may be. LOL Thank you for sticking with me. I appreciate it.
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Thank you for conceiving it and for carrying it through to delivery. (Did you see what I did there?) :))
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I sure did. :LOL
Comment from Jay Squires
This is so odd. Not your story. I mean, I downloaded this shortly after you posted it, then in the course of the day it vanished (I probably inadvertently did it myself.) I saw it today and started reading it immediately for fear I might do the same thing. The old noggin's not working the way it used to. I can't postpone things like I did in the past.
Barbara, this novel is warm and inviting. I like the characters, particularly Cord. He's willful and strong, but gentle, like coach. I think I'm going to enjoy this.
Jay
Chuckling, he continued, "To be honest either have I, [Would he have said, "either have I"? Or was it something I needed to point out to you?]
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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This is so odd. Not your story. I mean, I downloaded this shortly after you posted it, then in the course of the day it vanished (I probably inadvertently did it myself.) I saw it today and started reading it immediately for fear I might do the same thing. The old noggin's not working the way it used to. I can't postpone things like I did in the past.
Barbara, this novel is warm and inviting. I like the characters, particularly Cord. He's willful and strong, but gentle, like coach. I think I'm going to enjoy this.
Jay
Chuckling, he continued, "To be honest either have I, [Would he have said, "either have I"? Or was it something I needed to point out to you?]
Comment Written 09-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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I had Either would I, but three reviewers said it should be Neither have I. Thank you for the kind review. I am considering putting it back to Either.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
You took on this first chapter with confidence and it shows. Cord is a rather forward man who really seems interested in pulling Ali out of her broken heart. Ali tries hard not to respond because having a broken heart means you have to cry and be miserable for a time, even if Cord's enthusiasm makes it seem a waste of time. I look forward to reading more of their adventure. When they were making banana splits you mean "neither" not "either".
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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You took on this first chapter with confidence and it shows. Cord is a rather forward man who really seems interested in pulling Ali out of her broken heart. Ali tries hard not to respond because having a broken heart means you have to cry and be miserable for a time, even if Cord's enthusiasm makes it seem a waste of time. I look forward to reading more of their adventure. When they were making banana splits you mean "neither" not "either".
Comment Written 08-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from RGstar
Hi Barbara. I thought to look in on this one from the start.
Maybe I am old fashion, but...apart from great writing, the beginning of the chapter set the scene for me. I just couldn't shrug off the comments of father and son, could be seen as behaving slightly sexist against Alexandra with wry comments that maybe would not seem feasible, having just met:
''His stare crept from her feet to her face and grinned. "You're right about that. This cowboy hasn't seen anything look this good for a long time, if ever." First encounter...or perhaps second.
Father, on entering the room;
He petted the large dog's head. "Just a few minutes ago, I chased Samson from her bedroom. I think he has a crush on her."
Cordero's dad, Jorge walked in. "I can see why." He roughed up Samson's ears. "You have good taste in women."
It then brings in Alexandra's character into play as she reacts to none of this...apart from needing air...to which, the son, followed up to start some kind of friendship by going out to her. It would have been better if the mom had, so it might not seem as if things happening too fast between them.
Those things stayed in my mind all the way through the chapter as I wondered of Alexandra's character, and whether or not things were happening too quickly, and what it was her character stood for.
Yet, great writing, nice and routine, which is always a good thing.
I will look in again soon.
My best.
Have a great week.
RG
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Hi Barbara. I thought to look in on this one from the start.
Maybe I am old fashion, but...apart from great writing, the beginning of the chapter set the scene for me. I just couldn't shrug off the comments of father and son, could be seen as behaving slightly sexist against Alexandra with wry comments that maybe would not seem feasible, having just met:
''His stare crept from her feet to her face and grinned. "You're right about that. This cowboy hasn't seen anything look this good for a long time, if ever." First encounter...or perhaps second.
Father, on entering the room;
He petted the large dog's head. "Just a few minutes ago, I chased Samson from her bedroom. I think he has a crush on her."
Cordero's dad, Jorge walked in. "I can see why." He roughed up Samson's ears. "You have good taste in women."
It then brings in Alexandra's character into play as she reacts to none of this...apart from needing air...to which, the son, followed up to start some kind of friendship by going out to her. It would have been better if the mom had, so it might not seem as if things happening too fast between them.
Those things stayed in my mind all the way through the chapter as I wondered of Alexandra's character, and whether or not things were happening too quickly, and what it was her character stood for.
Yet, great writing, nice and routine, which is always a good thing.
I will look in again soon.
My best.
Have a great week.
RG
Comment Written 08-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Interesting comments. I will consider those. The moms have known each other from childhood. Allie's mom introduced Rosa to Jorge and the moms visit with each other every month. Rosa goes to Tonya's house one month and the next month Tonya goes to Rosa's. To the mom's know Cord and Allie very well and have discussed them completely. All of this will come out very soon. I don't know if this helps or not. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from judiverse
This generates a lot of interest. I'm glad you're doing the contest, and best of luck. This is very well thought out. I find Cordero very entertaining. If anyone can bring Alexandra out of her blues, he's the one. If Alexandra's a big-city lawyer. ranch life will be a big change for her. Her ex isn't helping with the repeated calls, even though she doesn't want to speak to the lout. Great beginning. I'd like to know a big more about how Alexandra happens to flee to Rosa. I think you could run both novels concurrently. judi
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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This generates a lot of interest. I'm glad you're doing the contest, and best of luck. This is very well thought out. I find Cordero very entertaining. If anyone can bring Alexandra out of her blues, he's the one. If Alexandra's a big-city lawyer. ranch life will be a big change for her. Her ex isn't helping with the repeated calls, even though she doesn't want to speak to the lout. Great beginning. I'd like to know a big more about how Alexandra happens to flee to Rosa. I think you could run both novels concurrently. judi
Comment Written 08-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Allie fleeing to Rosa's will come out. Thank you for the kind review.
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Best of luck in the contest. It should do well. judi
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
This story line is very captivating. A great beginning story about sadness, love and happiness. Is Cordero a lawyer?
The other novel has a lawyer trying to pester Katherine. How many chapters do you have left on your other novel? I try to keep up with your other novel's chapters. They are very good, too.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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This story line is very captivating. A great beginning story about sadness, love and happiness. Is Cordero a lawyer?
The other novel has a lawyer trying to pester Katherine. How many chapters do you have left on your other novel? I try to keep up with your other novel's chapters. They are very good, too.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Cord is a rancher, and???? It will come out. The other novel has 11 left. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Very well done. I forgot I was reading a contest entry, thinking it was a book. She gave him her phone and security code?????? Maybe she could have allowed him to guide her hands to do the blocking?
I often have more than one project going at the same time. Maybe that's why I'm not Stephen King.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Very well done. I forgot I was reading a contest entry, thinking it was a book. She gave him her phone and security code?????? Maybe she could have allowed him to guide her hands to do the blocking?
I often have more than one project going at the same time. Maybe that's why I'm not Stephen King.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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LOL I will think about the passcode. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Ah, so this is the start to your new novel, Barbara. I liked what I read,band I will certainly be looking at out for the continuation. It's also a great entry for the contest, and I wish you the best of luck. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Ah, so this is the start to your new novel, Barbara. I liked what I read,band I will certainly be looking at out for the continuation. It's also a great entry for the contest, and I wish you the best of luck. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 08-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
