Heart Crafted Poems -2021
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Come Live with Me"Musings of an old man -2021
29 total reviews
Comment from l.raven
Hi Jim, boy does this remind me of days
I lived in Florida...dreaming of castles in the sand...
and thinking of what it would be like with a family...
I think I spent to much time at the beach...LOL...
I love your poem my sweet friend...and love this picture...
very nicely written...dreams...sigh...love Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
Hi Jim, boy does this remind me of days
I lived in Florida...dreaming of castles in the sand...
and thinking of what it would be like with a family...
I think I spent to much time at the beach...LOL...
I love your poem my sweet friend...and love this picture...
very nicely written...dreams...sigh...love Linda xxoo
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
-
Linda, thank you so much! I hope you create wonderful music on the keyboards of life throughout 2021.
-
Thank You sweet guy...and your so welcome...love xxoo
Comment from karenina
Cool form! It's almost sonnet like and yet with twists and turns that up the originality factor and make it a whole new challenge! I'm a sucker for the seashore so you had me at line one...but more than that you followed form and did it with a lilting joyful tone that is very endearing! Happy 2021 to you!--Karenina
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
Cool form! It's almost sonnet like and yet with twists and turns that up the originality factor and make it a whole new challenge! I'm a sucker for the seashore so you had me at line one...but more than that you followed form and did it with a lilting joyful tone that is very endearing! Happy 2021 to you!--Karenina
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Karenina, thank you for the great validation...Here we go off to a New 2021 let?s let it rock!
Comment from Boogienights
This is beautiful and romantic. It reminds me of a Shakespeare poem I read once...The passionate Shepard to his lover...one of my favorites. I find this poem to be well written and very lovely. Thanks for sharing. :)
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
This is beautiful and romantic. It reminds me of a Shakespeare poem I read once...The passionate Shepard to his lover...one of my favorites. I find this poem to be well written and very lovely. Thanks for sharing. :)
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Oh, you are. So very kind, Happy New Year.
Comment from royowen
A beautifully written Roger's refrain, with those classically written mono rhymed stanzas, and a great refrain that rings true with every stroke of the pen. Yes, Elaine and I lived "in sin" before getting married six years later, two years before the birth of our first born, (arranged by God) I became a Christian 13 years later, but God takes the flotsam of this world and turns it into gold, well done Jim, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
A beautifully written Roger's refrain, with those classically written mono rhymed stanzas, and a great refrain that rings true with every stroke of the pen. Yes, Elaine and I lived "in sin" before getting married six years later, two years before the birth of our first born, (arranged by God) I became a Christian 13 years later, but God takes the flotsam of this world and turns it into gold, well done Jim, blessings Roy
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Smiling back, knowing God Grace is ever present in all things. happy New Year.
-
Well done Jim
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I adore the sentiments here, the loving connection and your words are heartfelt. The meter is slightly uneven in places but I can hear some melody here, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
I adore the sentiments here, the loving connection and your words are heartfelt. The meter is slightly uneven in places but I can hear some melody here, love Dolly x
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Thank you, have. A great New Year.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
The Creative Process writing prompt
Hello, Jim,
Lovely entry for the Roger's Refrain event in Potlatch Poetry challenge. It's a wonderful love poem. Good stanzaic quatrain stanzas in mono-rhyme. Well done.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
The Creative Process writing prompt
Hello, Jim,
Lovely entry for the Roger's Refrain event in Potlatch Poetry challenge. It's a wonderful love poem. Good stanzaic quatrain stanzas in mono-rhyme. Well done.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Thank you.
Comment from Ann Market
This heartfelt poem is lovely. I particularly liked your use of the title and the describing sentence... "build castles by the sea"...it's almost like a lifetime promise and commitment.
Beautiful poem!
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
This heartfelt poem is lovely. I particularly liked your use of the title and the describing sentence... "build castles by the sea"...it's almost like a lifetime promise and commitment.
Beautiful poem!
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Ann thank you.
Comment from Suzanna Ray
Dear JLR, You have done an excellent excellent job on constructing this poem for a very demanding potlatch poetry club challenge. I looked to see if there was one stanza that I liked better than the other, but outside of choosing another word here or there, I could not suggest anything, to make it better.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
Dear JLR, You have done an excellent excellent job on constructing this poem for a very demanding potlatch poetry club challenge. I looked to see if there was one stanza that I liked better than the other, but outside of choosing another word here or there, I could not suggest anything, to make it better.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Smiling back, I feel Jim?s classes are helping some.
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
What a sweet and lovely love poem from a romantic soul. Reading this made me forget everything not connected to love. Wonderfully written!
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
What a sweet and lovely love poem from a romantic soul. Reading this made me forget everything not connected to love. Wonderfully written!
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Rebecca, thank you.
Comment from Susan Larson
This is SO romantic and how could any woman resist such an invitation from such a sensitive loving poet? Only in this line "my wife you'd be come now my" I had to keep rereading it, because I didn't know if "be come" should be one word, or if there should be a comma after "be" No one else seemed to be bothered by that, so I guess it's just me! This would be a six if I still had one.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
This is SO romantic and how could any woman resist such an invitation from such a sensitive loving poet? Only in this line "my wife you'd be come now my" I had to keep rereading it, because I didn't know if "be come" should be one word, or if there should be a comma after "be" No one else seemed to be bothered by that, so I guess it's just me! This would be a six if I still had one.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
-
Susan thank you, I will rethink this