Reviews from

Football - A Novel

Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Football Chapter 3 part 2"
A mother faces life's struggles.

28 total reviews 
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

MMM Katherine is going to train the girls team volens-nolens:) I guess she has no choice if she wants to keep up with coach:) Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Cynthia Adams1
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is the first installment of your work that I've read. I found it kept my interest all the way through and I will read other installments as they become available.
It's not that easy to write believable dialogue for characters of mixed ages but I think you've done a good job. Keep up the nice work.

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from w.j.debi
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Excellent dialogue and descriptions. Things are really heating up between Mr. frost and Katherine. And none of it is her fault. Mr Frost has just targeted her to vent his frustrations. That is so low. If he keeps on, he may lose his position as department head and any friends he may have had.
Excellent way to end the chapter. I want to turn the page and read what comes next.

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Looks like Katherine is in for never ending harassment from Frost, but something tells me she isn't the type to take it for long without retaliation. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from estory
Excellent
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Lively dialogue really drives this story forward and the characters keep unfolding into new relationships and metrics. We see that Frost character continues to be hard on Katherine, and we also get the motivation behind it in the story about his son, related by another math teacher. Personalities and emotions keep bubbling up in your dialogue and its very realistic. You're setting up some interesting conflicts and possibilities for romance and friendship and the story is coming along. estory

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is such an enthralling story that I just can't seem get enough of somehow. You have me hooked. I look forward to each post. Well written!

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from RPSaxena
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hello Barbara.Wilkey,
Nice piece of Romance Fiction having lucid as well as perfectly matching the theme phraseology, captivating flow throughout from the beginning to the end, and depicting nice development of the story.
These lines in the End are particularly noteworthy, for they are working as a HOOK - A Good Quality of any writing:
"Over the intercom system came, "Mrs. Riley, please report to the office."
"Now what?"
[ Please see the 1st sentence in TODAY'S POST: "Katherine arrived to school about 7:15." Here 'arrived to or arrived at'? Just for the sake of my knowledge, if you don't mind.]

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review. In the first sentence I will change it to 'at'
reply by RPSaxena on 31-Oct-2020
    Barbara.Wilkey, Most Welcome!
    With best wishes,
    ~ RP
Comment from Ben Colder
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Why is there one in every crowd? The special voice always finds fault with sports and how it interferes but really it is a great tool for motivation. Academic studies normally falls in place and something the teacher can use as a crutch toward eligibility to play. Of course the girls always did much of mine and it shows, LOL. Lets give the title a few more post. It will jump out at you.

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent
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"Two are his." She held up one. "This is mine. Do you know where he is?" [So she's carrying 3 coffees in her hands?]

This is moving right along. It sounds like you have a very secure handle on high school teacher social activity. It all sounds so authentic.

Great job.


 Comment Written 25-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review. She sure it. I've done it, with my purse on my arm.
Comment from judiverse
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It seems that Katherine has found a new friend in Angie. She will need one, as Frost definitely has it in for her. Now he doesn't think she's up to teaching the classes she's been assigned. He's making himself look bad, and he doesn't seem to have many friends in the department. It is no doubt true that the athletes think their coaches are into torture. Excellent chapter. I'd steer away from "Against All Odds." It's been done. judi

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
    Thank you for the kind review. I agree about the title.
reply by judiverse on 31-Oct-2020
    You're very welcome. You'll think of a title as the story progresses. judi