thoughts and feelings in poetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 53 "Grandchildren"poems reflecting my thoughts and feelings
3 total reviews
Comment from karenina
OOOPS . I give five stars because you love your grandkids, but your syllable count is off.
My grandchildren (should be two syllables, is three)
Brighton and Ryleigh Jean (should be four syllables, is six)
They are the two cutest children (should be six syllables , is eight....)
This old grandma has ever seen (Should be eight syllables, is ten)
Brighton is.....and Ryleigh is only four (should be 10should be 8 is 12 syllables),
Well mannnered, sweet loving and kind (should be 6 sylables, is 8 syllables)
YES I DO adore (SHOULD BE FOUR SYLLABLES, IS FIVE)
my GRANCHILDREN (SHOULD BE TWO SYLLABLES IS THREE)
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i think YOU WERE COUNTING WORDS, NOT SYLLABLES.....
eITHER WAY, i'D EDIT THIS AND LEAVE THE POEM BUT REMOVE THE DESCRIPTION AS A RICTAMETER...OR REWRITE AND GO BY SYLLABEL COUNT (WHICH WILL BE MUCH MORE DIFFICULT TO MAINTAIN THE MESSAGE OF THE POEM)
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eVERYBODY makes mistakes.....don't sweat the small stuff....just don't call this a rictameter.....
Karenina
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2018
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OOOPS . I give five stars because you love your grandkids, but your syllable count is off.
My grandchildren (should be two syllables, is three)
Brighton and Ryleigh Jean (should be four syllables, is six)
They are the two cutest children (should be six syllables , is eight....)
This old grandma has ever seen (Should be eight syllables, is ten)
Brighton is.....and Ryleigh is only four (should be 10should be 8 is 12 syllables),
Well mannnered, sweet loving and kind (should be 6 sylables, is 8 syllables)
YES I DO adore (SHOULD BE FOUR SYLLABLES, IS FIVE)
my GRANCHILDREN (SHOULD BE TWO SYLLABLES IS THREE)
--------------------------------------------------------------------
i think YOU WERE COUNTING WORDS, NOT SYLLABLES.....
eITHER WAY, i'D EDIT THIS AND LEAVE THE POEM BUT REMOVE THE DESCRIPTION AS A RICTAMETER...OR REWRITE AND GO BY SYLLABEL COUNT (WHICH WILL BE MUCH MORE DIFFICULT TO MAINTAIN THE MESSAGE OF THE POEM)
---------------------------------------------------------------------
eVERYBODY makes mistakes.....don't sweat the small stuff....just don't call this a rictameter.....
Karenina
Comment Written 06-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2018
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I am so sorry ,I thought it was a word count, my bad I dropped out of the contest..I need to pay closer attention to the requirements.Thanks for your review and pointing out my mistake.I appreciate it.God bless.
Comment from Mary Hollingsworth
Well said Grandma there are no children on the face of the Earth and as beautiful as our grandchildren. And it spurts adrenaline of joy and laughter we have the opportunity to share and spend some time with them especially when they're at Grandma's house. And ask Grandma to make those special little goodies even that much greater nice on I love it thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2018
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Well said Grandma there are no children on the face of the Earth and as beautiful as our grandchildren. And it spurts adrenaline of joy and laughter we have the opportunity to share and spend some time with them especially when they're at Grandma's house. And ask Grandma to make those special little goodies even that much greater nice on I love it thanks for sharing
Comment Written 06-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2018
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Mary,Thank you for your review and comments.
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My pleasure
Comment from Harry Smith
What a nice dedication to your grandchildren and they will be able to look back at this some day and it will mean a lots to them. I really enjoyed the read and will be back for more.
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2018
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What a nice dedication to your grandchildren and they will be able to look back at this some day and it will mean a lots to them. I really enjoyed the read and will be back for more.
Comment Written 06-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2018
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Thank you for your review and comments .I do appreciate them .Have a great day.