Comment from adewpearl

Excellent

good use of enjambment to keep thoughts flowing from line to line
solid rhymes
this too will come to our past
- this too will come to pass
So i'm going to trust - I'm
good alliteration in puts the pieces
effective use of storm imagery in conveying your message of faith
Brooke

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 25-May-2014

thanks

Comment from Maureen's Pen

Excellent

My friend sometimes it's difficult to watch - but I liked how you created this with a knowing of the wisdom but the difficulty at times to let them sort it out on their own.
Nicely penned - some edits needed below.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen

Edit Checks:

"own mistake.And There are consequences" // Add space before "And"

"I realize that this to will become " // too

"So i'm going to trust God as he puts the .." // I'm

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 25-May-2014

thanks

Comment from Glasstruth

Excellent

We have free will, and the future is our own making, or at least partly. I would begin this: "And There are consequences" as a new line. Looks a bit odd the way you have it. Comparing life to a storm is the perfect metaphor for that. Thanks for sharing. Les

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2014

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reply by the author on 25-May-2014

thanks