The Christmas Baby
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "The Baby Room"Sam n Sarah get a baby with dire consequences
9 total reviews
Comment from royowen
You sure think of some amazingly great themes to write, I have read some great tales from gifted writers I'm the pst, but some never finish them, I sure hope you finish this one, it's a most sympathetic theme, in this dying, beautifully written, blessings Roy
Typo : Kitchen('n on the left.
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2024
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You sure think of some amazingly great themes to write, I have read some great tales from gifted writers I'm the pst, but some never finish them, I sure hope you finish this one, it's a most sympathetic theme, in this dying, beautifully written, blessings Roy
Typo : Kitchen('n on the left.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2024
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Thanks Roy!
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Well done
Comment from RJ Derby
The dynamic between Sam and Taylor is truly compelling, and you've done a fantastic job building tension while exploring their complex relationship. The descriptions and symbolism, particularly the poignant use of the baby room, add incredible depth. Your exploration of themes like grief and redemption is thought-provoking and resonates deeply. A little refine work on the pacing and it'll be very strong-well done!
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2024
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The dynamic between Sam and Taylor is truly compelling, and you've done a fantastic job building tension while exploring their complex relationship. The descriptions and symbolism, particularly the poignant use of the baby room, add incredible depth. Your exploration of themes like grief and redemption is thought-provoking and resonates deeply. A little refine work on the pacing and it'll be very strong-well done!
Comment Written 03-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2024
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Thanks for the in-depth and candid review.
Comment from lyenochka
Poor Sam has been through the wringer this night. Hope Taylor doesn't do anything rash or lie about him. It was foolish to bring her to his house but maybe she really will trust him.
Suggestions :
I'm okay." She helped (since it is Sam talking, I think it's best to have a speech tag here like Sam said)
Kitchens on the left (Kitchen's)
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2024
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Poor Sam has been through the wringer this night. Hope Taylor doesn't do anything rash or lie about him. It was foolish to bring her to his house but maybe she really will trust him.
Suggestions :
I'm okay." She helped (since it is Sam talking, I think it's best to have a speech tag here like Sam said)
Kitchens on the left (Kitchen's)
Comment Written 03-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2024
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Thanks. Appreciate you.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is a wonderful story, and I can't wait to read more. I do hope you finish the story about Luke too.
Sam stood on the other side of the kitchen Island. (island.)
Tears formed in Sam's eyes. "I'm okay. He pulled away. (okay.")
"Is it the baby?" He asked. (he asked.)
She whispered in his ear. "You must be an angel from heaven." (ear,)
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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This is a wonderful story, and I can't wait to read more. I do hope you finish the story about Luke too.
Sam stood on the other side of the kitchen Island. (island.)
Tears formed in Sam's eyes. "I'm okay. He pulled away. (okay.")
"Is it the baby?" He asked. (he asked.)
She whispered in his ear. "You must be an angel from heaven." (ear,)
Comment Written 02-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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Thanks Barbara, I'm going back to Luke in the western. Have an interesting turn of events with Luke coming in a few chapters. Appreciate what you said.
Comment from BethShelby
This is a good story that sounds like a decent man trying to help and lady of the street. I just noticed it is listed as a horror thriller story. I don't know who is going to be the victim here. Both of them seem vulnerable.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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This is a good story that sounds like a decent man trying to help and lady of the street. I just noticed it is listed as a horror thriller story. I don't know who is going to be the victim here. Both of them seem vulnerable.
Comment Written 02-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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Thanks Beth. I'm torn over whether it is family as theme or thriller. I'd say it's both.
Comment from patcelaw
Ironically, I was one of those girls who had a child that I was not wanting to keep and I managed to be able to get the child life and give him up for adoption. Years later when I met my husband and I married him, he and I were tried several times to get pregnant and I had three miscarriages in rapid virus succession. Amazingly though the next pregnancy that I had resulted in me having a child and that child is my oldest daughter. She was born on Christmas Day. Patricia.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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Ironically, I was one of those girls who had a child that I was not wanting to keep and I managed to be able to get the child life and give him up for adoption. Years later when I met my husband and I married him, he and I were tried several times to get pregnant and I had three miscarriages in rapid virus succession. Amazingly though the next pregnancy that I had resulted in me having a child and that child is my oldest daughter. She was born on Christmas Day. Patricia.
Comment Written 02-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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Wonderfull. Thanks for sharing. My son Nathan was born on Christmas day too! Actually, I will be using him in the story, esp. since Nathan means, "Gift of God."
Comment from Gayla putnam
You have left me wondering what will happen next. The title is A Christmas Baby, but there are prickles on my spine, praying it won't be horror. I like the atmosphere you created, along with the characters.
I look forward to the continuing saga. gayla
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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You have left me wondering what will happen next. The title is A Christmas Baby, but there are prickles on my spine, praying it won't be horror. I like the atmosphere you created, along with the characters.
I look forward to the continuing saga. gayla
Comment Written 02-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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Thanks so much. Your words made my day. I hope to not disappointment. When I write, I try to see it as a screenplay and how it would be viewed.
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Thanks so much. Your words made my day. I hope to not disappointment. When I write, I try to see it as a screenplay and how it would be viewed.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I really felt the raw emotion in your story. The way you show Sam's grief and the tension between him and Taylor kept me hooked. I like how you let their actions speak for themselves. I love how the room with the baby's things was described, it gave me chills. You really made the characters feel alive and gave me a lot to think about. Great work! Keep it up!
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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I really felt the raw emotion in your story. The way you show Sam's grief and the tension between him and Taylor kept me hooked. I like how you let their actions speak for themselves. I love how the room with the baby's things was described, it gave me chills. You really made the characters feel alive and gave me a lot to think about. Great work! Keep it up!
Comment Written 02-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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Appreciate in particular what you described that resonates. I'd like to think that is one of the best helps for anyone's project.
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Appreciate in particular what you described that resonates. I'd like to think that is one of the best helps for anyone's project.
Comment from Cecilia A Heiskary
This is an awesome story. It is very descriptive and pulls your reader into the scene as if they were standing by watching everything unfold in front of them. The story is very engaging and holds the reader captive.
Well done
Cecilia
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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This is an awesome story. It is very descriptive and pulls your reader into the scene as if they were standing by watching everything unfold in front of them. The story is very engaging and holds the reader captive.
Well done
Cecilia
Comment Written 02-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2024
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Appreciate mentioning those exact words. It really motivates me to take this to the finish line.
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Appreciate mentioning those exact words. It really motivates me to take this to the finish line.
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You're welcome
Cecilia