His Silence
Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "His Silence - Chapter Nineteen "Why did a 14 year old boy murder his parents?
10 total reviews
Comment from Neonewman
Yes, I felt the creepiness flowing through the dining area, especially when they welcomed Danielle and Calum simultaneously. Sent shivers up my spine. So, it sounds like a cult.
God bless,
Steve
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2024
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Yes, I felt the creepiness flowing through the dining area, especially when they welcomed Danielle and Calum simultaneously. Sent shivers up my spine. So, it sounds like a cult.
God bless,
Steve
Comment Written 10-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2024
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Thank you, Steve, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
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My pleasure, Jacob.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
You are doing a very good job of making Danielle and Callum feel uncomfortable with the atmosphere of the dinner. It is a very awkward situation. I do wonder what this sentence has to do with the paragraph--I used to hate too many people at once.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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You are doing a very good job of making Danielle and Callum feel uncomfortable with the atmosphere of the dinner. It is a very awkward situation. I do wonder what this sentence has to do with the paragraph--I used to hate too many people at once.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Thank you, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
This is all very weird and unsettling for Danielle. I still think it's some kind of religion order/retreat and Oliver isn't quite as charming as he first seems. And how is Danielle going to explain staying away for a few nights? Many questions here as your excellent story delves ever deeper. A vivid scene of them all sitting down at the meal table. Thanks for sharing. Debbie. A couple of suggestions below:
First para - from the way (how - delete) he spoke to me earlier
I can see (Callum) struggling to keep a straight face
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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This is all very weird and unsettling for Danielle. I still think it's some kind of religion order/retreat and Oliver isn't quite as charming as he first seems. And how is Danielle going to explain staying away for a few nights? Many questions here as your excellent story delves ever deeper. A vivid scene of them all sitting down at the meal table. Thanks for sharing. Debbie. A couple of suggestions below:
First para - from the way (how - delete) he spoke to me earlier
I can see (Callum) struggling to keep a straight face
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Debbie, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
It is a commune. I am curious its purpose. I am also a little afraid for Danielle. There must be a very good reason her parents left.
beside vs next to (According to my editor it has to deal with the definition of both words. Beside deals with people and next to deals with objects or a person and a object.)
crossing his legs as we sit next to each other at the table in the living area. (sit beside each other)
Danielle, would you like to sit next to me?' Oliver asks, smiling. (sit beside me)
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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It is a commune. I am curious its purpose. I am also a little afraid for Danielle. There must be a very good reason her parents left.
beside vs next to (According to my editor it has to deal with the definition of both words. Beside deals with people and next to deals with objects or a person and a object.)
crossing his legs as we sit next to each other at the table in the living area. (sit beside each other)
Danielle, would you like to sit next to me?' Oliver asks, smiling. (sit beside me)
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Barbara, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Hi Jacob! The creepiness factor is actually increasing with each chapter and makes me think of a few other cults of infamy. I'm thinking mom and dad did a great thing getting the kids out, but, apparently, Harvey didn't agree. There seems to be an obsession with Danielle to be a breeder or something? And the girl Eve is her replacement? Again, don't know, just some thoughts.
Take care,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Hi Jacob! The creepiness factor is actually increasing with each chapter and makes me think of a few other cults of infamy. I'm thinking mom and dad did a great thing getting the kids out, but, apparently, Harvey didn't agree. There seems to be an obsession with Danielle to be a breeder or something? And the girl Eve is her replacement? Again, don't know, just some thoughts.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Rhonda, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This chapter leads me to think there is a religious cult in this residence. That is due to the all-white clothes worn by everyone, and the way they all speak with this line: 'Welcome, Danielle and Callum,' everyone says in unison.
Danielle, however, is thinking there must be a business side of the relationship somewhere. At least one reference that Harvey said is starting to make sense, but there is only a hint so far. The ice cubes in the orange juice remind me of a grandparent. We will have to see what happens next. Is it a cult that abuses children as part of some odd ritual?
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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This chapter leads me to think there is a religious cult in this residence. That is due to the all-white clothes worn by everyone, and the way they all speak with this line: 'Welcome, Danielle and Callum,' everyone says in unison.
Danielle, however, is thinking there must be a business side of the relationship somewhere. At least one reference that Harvey said is starting to make sense, but there is only a hint so far. The ice cubes in the orange juice remind me of a grandparent. We will have to see what happens next. Is it a cult that abuses children as part of some odd ritual?
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
You do such a good job of creating an atmosphere of mystery. I felt like I'm right there with the characters, experiencing the awkwardness alongside them. Danielle and Callum are particularly interesting characters. I really enjoyed reading this chapter - it left me eager to know more!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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You do such a good job of creating an atmosphere of mystery. I felt like I'm right there with the characters, experiencing the awkwardness alongside them. Danielle and Callum are particularly interesting characters. I really enjoyed reading this chapter - it left me eager to know more!
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Begin Again
It strikes me as weird that these people have not seen or known Danielle since she was very young but act as if they have shared her entire life. It must be cult of some kind or maybe the Amish. the latter would not wish her harm I think, but a cult would be a different story. Either way, I don't get the feeling that Danielle or Callum are safe... someone is hiding something from them.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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It strikes me as weird that these people have not seen or known Danielle since she was very young but act as if they have shared her entire life. It must be cult of some kind or maybe the Amish. the latter would not wish her harm I think, but a cult would be a different story. Either way, I don't get the feeling that Danielle or Callum are safe... someone is hiding something from them.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Carol, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from royowen
This seems to have the hallmarks of a religious cult, from my experience sometimes it's the difference between the control of adhering to law, and allowing to grace to function, it's not really difficult to tell the difference, beautifully written Jacob, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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This seems to have the hallmarks of a religious cult, from my experience sometimes it's the difference between the control of adhering to law, and allowing to grace to function, it's not really difficult to tell the difference, beautifully written Jacob, blessings Roy
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Roy, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
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Most welcome
Comment from BethShelby
At least others have cars. No alchol and no meat and everyone wearing the same kind of clothes. This definately sounds like a religious cult. There are two such places like that near me. The Amish do eat meat however but they don't have cars. I'm starting to think she is getting many answers but these people all seem to care about her.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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At least others have cars. No alchol and no meat and everyone wearing the same kind of clothes. This definately sounds like a religious cult. There are two such places like that near me. The Amish do eat meat however but they don't have cars. I'm starting to think she is getting many answers but these people all seem to care about her.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Beth, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.