Conflict in Connecticut.
A true story that happened to me.33 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
The reader is definitely leaning forward and holding on to their throat as they read these couple of paragraphs: "Quickly shifting into second gear, the small truck with a 2.4 liter cubic inch engine sped up very quickly to 35 miles per hour. I leaned over and punched one of the men right in the eye. His head jilted backwards. His eyes grew very big. He was scared now because he saw I was ready to fight for my life! The other man threw a punch at me while I was driving, but I turned, and he missed. I Shifted into third gear, the truck accelerated to 45 miles per hour. Both men tightened their grip around my neck. It started to hurt. I could barely breath! I'm glad you didn't care when we are faced with survival we don't care about anyone else except our survival. You had to have a good summary as to what the situation probably always is
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The reader is definitely leaning forward and holding on to their throat as they read these couple of paragraphs: "Quickly shifting into second gear, the small truck with a 2.4 liter cubic inch engine sped up very quickly to 35 miles per hour. I leaned over and punched one of the men right in the eye. His head jilted backwards. His eyes grew very big. He was scared now because he saw I was ready to fight for my life! The other man threw a punch at me while I was driving, but I turned, and he missed. I Shifted into third gear, the truck accelerated to 45 miles per hour. Both men tightened their grip around my neck. It started to hurt. I could barely breath! I'm glad you didn't care when we are faced with survival we don't care about anyone else except our survival. You had to have a good summary as to what the situation probably always is
Comment Written 19-Sep-2024
Comment from F. William Lester
My only thought, granted I wasn't there, is why didn't you steer toward the parked cars sooner? Usually in those situations, we don't think clearly. I'm not criticizing your actions, but just wondering if the thought occurred sooner. Glad you're okay and thanks for your service. Be well.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2024
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My only thought, granted I wasn't there, is why didn't you steer toward the parked cars sooner? Usually in those situations, we don't think clearly. I'm not criticizing your actions, but just wondering if the thought occurred sooner. Glad you're okay and thanks for your service. Be well.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2024
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Well, thank you William for your kind review. I really appreciate it! Everything went so fast that before I thought about it I was too busy throwing punches I guess. But when I thought about it everything changed real fast!
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Thanks. Stay well.
Comment from papa55mike
It's amazing the things we'll do to survive an attack while fighting for your life. What a wonderfully written story. Best of luck with your writing! Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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It's amazing the things we'll do to survive an attack while fighting for your life. What a wonderfully written story. Best of luck with your writing! Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 18-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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Well, thank you Mike for the nice review. I really appreciate that!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
What a story, Harry! I was on the edge of my seat! In the beginning, I was trying to visualise where they were and then realised that they were not in the truck but hanging on outside. I didn't understand how they could do that and attack you at the same time. But the assault was horrific and, just as you thought it was over, you then got shot at! Your anger was palpable and I'm not surprised that you wanted to kill them, given the outpouring of adrenaline and the shock and force of the attack. I'm not sure if this contest has been and gone but there would be no justice if this entry doesn't win. Good luck anyway! And a virtual six from me. Debbie
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2024
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What a story, Harry! I was on the edge of my seat! In the beginning, I was trying to visualise where they were and then realised that they were not in the truck but hanging on outside. I didn't understand how they could do that and attack you at the same time. But the assault was horrific and, just as you thought it was over, you then got shot at! Your anger was palpable and I'm not surprised that you wanted to kill them, given the outpouring of adrenaline and the shock and force of the attack. I'm not sure if this contest has been and gone but there would be no justice if this entry doesn't win. Good luck anyway! And a virtual six from me. Debbie
Comment Written 14-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2024
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Well, thank you so much Debbie for your great review. I really appreciate that!
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This is an incredible story. It makes me want to avoid New London, Connecticut. You did a good job with the flow of action. It would be an award-winning scene in a movie.
Little fixes:
When you are fighting for your life, "you do whatever it takes to win and save your life". You can take the quotation marks out unless you were quoting someone specific. So:
When you are fighting for your life, you do whatever it takes to win and save your life.
Change I lie there restless all night
to: I lay there, restless all night.
As I walked out of the police department, I said to myself, "so much for that,"
Just capitalize So in that quote
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2024
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This is an incredible story. It makes me want to avoid New London, Connecticut. You did a good job with the flow of action. It would be an award-winning scene in a movie.
Little fixes:
When you are fighting for your life, "you do whatever it takes to win and save your life". You can take the quotation marks out unless you were quoting someone specific. So:
When you are fighting for your life, you do whatever it takes to win and save your life.
Change I lie there restless all night
to: I lay there, restless all night.
As I walked out of the police department, I said to myself, "so much for that,"
Just capitalize So in that quote
Comment Written 12-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2024
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Well, thank you Crystie for your review and insight. I really appreciate that! And thanks for catching my ooppss!
Comment from Patrick Bernardy
Hello again Harry!
I enjoyed your personal narrative. It was a lot more enjoyable to read than I imagine it would have been living through it! As I was reading, I kept asking myself: why is he not going to the hospital? I got this image of the Terminator in the first movie going back to the hotel room and stitching up his wounds.
Anyway, I don't have a lot to recommend concerning the piece overall. It was an interesting read from start to finish. I did have some things I pulled out for you to fix if you are so inclined:
-------"I rolled my driver[-]side window down to enjoy the fresh air"
-------"[I heard him groan] because I had busted his lip! I quickly threw another punch and hit him in the nose and blood flew again. [I heard him groan]" --There is a repetition of this phrase in consecutive sentences. I think it would be better if you reworded one of them.
-------"you do whatever it takes to win and safe [save] your life."
-------"and did not see anyone around[,] so, I went to my room and closed the door." The comma should be before "so," not after.
-------"I thought, what if he had AIDS or [some] other disease!"
-------I laid [lie] there restless all night and was in pain from"
-------"What happened to you,["] he exclaimed?" and remove the quotation mark at the end and add a period.
I hope you can use these simple fixes for your narrative. I'm glad you survived your ordeal all those years ago and are here today to write about it!
Patrick
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
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Hello again Harry!
I enjoyed your personal narrative. It was a lot more enjoyable to read than I imagine it would have been living through it! As I was reading, I kept asking myself: why is he not going to the hospital? I got this image of the Terminator in the first movie going back to the hotel room and stitching up his wounds.
Anyway, I don't have a lot to recommend concerning the piece overall. It was an interesting read from start to finish. I did have some things I pulled out for you to fix if you are so inclined:
-------"I rolled my driver[-]side window down to enjoy the fresh air"
-------"[I heard him groan] because I had busted his lip! I quickly threw another punch and hit him in the nose and blood flew again. [I heard him groan]" --There is a repetition of this phrase in consecutive sentences. I think it would be better if you reworded one of them.
-------"you do whatever it takes to win and safe [save] your life."
-------"and did not see anyone around[,] so, I went to my room and closed the door." The comma should be before "so," not after.
-------"I thought, what if he had AIDS or [some] other disease!"
-------I laid [lie] there restless all night and was in pain from"
-------"What happened to you,["] he exclaimed?" and remove the quotation mark at the end and add a period.
I hope you can use these simple fixes for your narrative. I'm glad you survived your ordeal all those years ago and are here today to write about it!
Patrick
Comment Written 04-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
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Well, thank you Patrick. I really appreciate your insight and great review!
Comment from Douglas Goff
Oh my goodness, Harry! That is some ordeal.
You could have died at any moment. You got really lucky, my friend.
The cops attitude doesn't surprise me. Their ranks are ripe with laziness.
Thank you for your service.
D
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2024
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Oh my goodness, Harry! That is some ordeal.
You could have died at any moment. You got really lucky, my friend.
The cops attitude doesn't surprise me. Their ranks are ripe with laziness.
Thank you for your service.
D
Comment Written 03-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2024
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lol! Yes, Douglas you are so right. It was a bitter fight! Thank you so much for your review!
Comment from royowen
It sounds like you were pretty fortunate to be alive in this extreme situation Harry, but I must admit it I might have done the same, perhaps they might thik twice about trying to rob someone again, it would mean that their robbing lives were too dangerous an occupation, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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It sounds like you were pretty fortunate to be alive in this extreme situation Harry, but I must admit it I might have done the same, perhaps they might thik twice about trying to rob someone again, it would mean that their robbing lives were too dangerous an occupation, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 31-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Well, thank you Roy. That is the way I thought about it too!
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Well done
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Thank you Roy!
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Well done
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Bless you
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Quite the excitement! Nicely written, even if there are a couple places of what seemed like repetition.
Was there no sick bay on base?
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Quite the excitement! Nicely written, even if there are a couple places of what seemed like repetition.
Was there no sick bay on base?
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Yes, there was but I was too mad to see anybody at that time. Thank you for the review. I really appreciate that!
Comment from Teri7
Harry, This is a very well written and down right scary story you have told us about. My husband was in the U.S. Coast Guard many years ago. I am so sorry that happened to you, but I am so thankful you are here today to tell your story. Maybe it will help someone else going through the same things in life. I worked for our local police department, many years ago. I was an executive secretary for a Police Dept. I got to type up reports and wait on the officers who needed supplies. Thank you for sharing. It made my heartbeat really fast as I was reading that! Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Harry, This is a very well written and down right scary story you have told us about. My husband was in the U.S. Coast Guard many years ago. I am so sorry that happened to you, but I am so thankful you are here today to tell your story. Maybe it will help someone else going through the same things in life. I worked for our local police department, many years ago. I was an executive secretary for a Police Dept. I got to type up reports and wait on the officers who needed supplies. Thank you for sharing. It made my heartbeat really fast as I was reading that! Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 28-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Well, thank you Teri7. I really appreciate your review!
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You are so welcome Harry. Blessings, Teri
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Thank you!
