Little Billy
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "The Devils Seed"memiors from my life experiences.
116 total reviews
Comment from misscookie
Love the artwork just looking into her eyes will lead you into the story of temptation.
I love the movement of your poem it brings a touch of excitment into it.To all those who have or are tempted.
Remember you can't put your sins behind you until you fsce them.
this is a good write.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
  |
Love the artwork just looking into her eyes will lead you into the story of temptation.
I love the movement of your poem it brings a touch of excitment into it.To all those who have or are tempted.
Remember you can't put your sins behind you until you fsce them.
this is a good write.
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thanks misscookie
-
You're very welcome, take care.
Comment from Signaler
Hi keimosobie,
I am a firm believer that poetry should be brief and succint, and whiloe I like what you have written so far, I think if you rework it and make us want to know your subject more that it will give your work more power.
Angels to watch over you, Signaler
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
 |
Hi keimosobie,
I am a firm believer that poetry should be brief and succint, and whiloe I like what you have written so far, I think if you rework it and make us want to know your subject more that it will give your work more power.
Angels to watch over you, Signaler
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thanks
Comment from Pen&Ink
Hello keimosobie,
Amen. I have indeed yielded to temptation. Never thought I would, but I did. You describe the feelings of desperation quite well.
Ray
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
Hello keimosobie,
Amen. I have indeed yielded to temptation. Never thought I would, but I did. You describe the feelings of desperation quite well.
Ray
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thank you ray
Comment from Raul GF
Temptation turned into the devils seed, I like that analogy, what becomes of it, the flower or the tree, depends on each individual and the way the let that seed grow or the what they nurture they heart with.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
Temptation turned into the devils seed, I like that analogy, what becomes of it, the flower or the tree, depends on each individual and the way the let that seed grow or the what they nurture they heart with.
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
yes thats true thank you.
Comment from jason456
Your poem shows a great deal of talent in the way you write. I enjoyed this poem and the way in which you wrote it. It is very descriptive and and the reader can relate to this, so easily. Well done.
Patti :)
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
Your poem shows a great deal of talent in the way you write. I enjoyed this poem and the way in which you wrote it. It is very descriptive and and the reader can relate to this, so easily. Well done.
Patti :)
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thank you patti for the complement and the stars.
-
You are so very welcome.
Patti :)
Comment from Ann Smith
We all have fallen into temptation. I especially like the metaphor of devil's seed. He knows all too well how to plant it, and where to plant it, so it will grow. That's why we need to keep in the word. I especially like the lines, 'go back Moses with your commandment you don't know hopeless abandonment.' Those lines seem to be crying out for help. It also reminds me of the song Go Down Moses way down in Egypt's land. Egypt for sure was the devil's seed. ann
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
We all have fallen into temptation. I especially like the metaphor of devil's seed. He knows all too well how to plant it, and where to plant it, so it will grow. That's why we need to keep in the word. I especially like the lines, 'go back Moses with your commandment you don't know hopeless abandonment.' Those lines seem to be crying out for help. It also reminds me of the song Go Down Moses way down in Egypt's land. Egypt for sure was the devil's seed. ann
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thank you ann for your comments and your stars.
Comment from Penpal
Good poem portraying temptation, and I found it read smooth and had great rhyming. I especially liked:
go back Moses with your commandment
you don't know hopeless abandonment?
Sooo true.
I appreciate your notes as well.
Pen
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
Good poem portraying temptation, and I found it read smooth and had great rhyming. I especially liked:
go back Moses with your commandment
you don't know hopeless abandonment?
Sooo true.
I appreciate your notes as well.
Pen
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thank you
Comment from Robert D Wilson
Very interesting, keimosobie! Very evocative words used to describe this temptress, without crossing over "the line". Trying to figure out if this is a warning to others or wishfull thinking? LOL!
Thanks for sharing, my friend!
Blessings,
Bob
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
Very interesting, keimosobie! Very evocative words used to describe this temptress, without crossing over "the line". Trying to figure out if this is a warning to others or wishfull thinking? LOL!
Thanks for sharing, my friend!
Blessings,
Bob
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
your welcome.
Comment from Connie C
You've done a great job here of expressing the feelings of temptation, especially in the first three stanzas. The use of the words, "smoldering embers that combust into fire" really give the poem depth in defining temptation. Powerfully worded; I'm surprised this wasn't entered into the Temptation contest. Connie
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
You've done a great job here of expressing the feelings of temptation, especially in the first three stanzas. The use of the words, "smoldering embers that combust into fire" really give the poem depth in defining temptation. Powerfully worded; I'm surprised this wasn't entered into the Temptation contest. Connie
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thank you
Comment from chita
you have great artwork and good arthor notes--you have a good flow with your poem--you write with emotion--I love how you write about everyone's heart has a hidden imagination which I believe that is true and you conveyed this in your poem--great job.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
|
you have great artwork and good arthor notes--you have a good flow with your poem--you write with emotion--I love how you write about everyone's heart has a hidden imagination which I believe that is true and you conveyed this in your poem--great job.
Comment Written 18-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2010
-
thank you chita for your words of encouiragement.
-
You're welcome!!