The Edge of Reality
How it feels to be near death89 total reviews
Comment from HPicasso
This free verse poem is about the way a near death experience feels (very deeply emotional).
Very good wording and great imagery.
Very interesting piece; pretty dark and very intense.
The art work is very telling. Well done!
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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This free verse poem is about the way a near death experience feels (very deeply emotional).
Very good wording and great imagery.
Very interesting piece; pretty dark and very intense.
The art work is very telling. Well done!
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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thank you very much for the kind review...dark lord
Comment from Rdfrdmom2
Dklrdmcches:
Tiptoeing on the edge of insanity
Oh, I've been there before
Unsure of my humanity
Tired of the blood and gore
Trying hard to run away
From sights that still haunt me
I don't know what else to say
Other than to wish some peace for thee
thanks for sharing
love,
jan
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Dklrdmcches:
Tiptoeing on the edge of insanity
Oh, I've been there before
Unsure of my humanity
Tired of the blood and gore
Trying hard to run away
From sights that still haunt me
I don't know what else to say
Other than to wish some peace for thee
thanks for sharing
love,
jan
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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thank you very much for the kind review...dark lord
Comment from Melspoems
wow, this is a very intense and very well written poem.
I totally relate to the feeling of needing to be busy to run from the darkness, and then just not being able to run anymore.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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wow, this is a very intense and very well written poem.
I totally relate to the feeling of needing to be busy to run from the darkness, and then just not being able to run anymore.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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thank you so very much for the kind review...dark lord
Comment from artemis53
What a classical story of a train heading for a demolished bridge. The words are frantic, the colors shout warnings and the picture looks like an open scream.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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What a classical story of a train heading for a demolished bridge. The words are frantic, the colors shout warnings and the picture looks like an open scream.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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thank you so very much for the kind review...dark lord
Comment from victortouche
I do in general like a dark side as well, and this was no exception. However, I am going to bring up one critical point. I think this poem would be better by a full level, if "I" wasn't used as much. Two times-stanza one-ok. Four times-stanza two-not ok. In fact the phrase "I am" is used twice in close proximity. Stanza three-starts with "I am" again, and "I" is used four more times. Stanza four- one time- perfect. Now, this may seem overly critical, but the poem was a good read in spite of this. It's just that these "I's" were like a mosquito annoying me while I read. Ok, enough. Please continue on, you write well enough, and my opinion is easily washed down with a quick slug of wine. Thank you for listening.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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I do in general like a dark side as well, and this was no exception. However, I am going to bring up one critical point. I think this poem would be better by a full level, if "I" wasn't used as much. Two times-stanza one-ok. Four times-stanza two-not ok. In fact the phrase "I am" is used twice in close proximity. Stanza three-starts with "I am" again, and "I" is used four more times. Stanza four- one time- perfect. Now, this may seem overly critical, but the poem was a good read in spite of this. It's just that these "I's" were like a mosquito annoying me while I read. Ok, enough. Please continue on, you write well enough, and my opinion is easily washed down with a quick slug of wine. Thank you for listening.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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thank you so very much for the honest review...dark lord
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BTW, I'm (oops, I used it too) sorry to hear of your harrowing medical experience. Good luck with all.
Comment from Gungalo
Dark Lord, this very aptly portrays exactly what a person would act like on the throes of death. You're good at it and this write proves it.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Dark Lord, this very aptly portrays exactly what a person would act like on the throes of death. You're good at it and this write proves it.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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WOW! I thank you so very much for this kind review...dark lord
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Smile.
Comment from Mara del Mar
The human is very fragile, but our body count with a good system of defense and even better, of alarm. I wait and desire that you are well now. This is a piece with flow smooth of read and great expresivity, congrats.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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The human is very fragile, but our body count with a good system of defense and even better, of alarm. I wait and desire that you are well now. This is a piece with flow smooth of read and great expresivity, congrats.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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I thank you so very much for the kind review...dark lord
Comment from MeagM
Very haunting and eerie. I really enjoyed the picture that was painted with this poem, with the struggle. So well-written and quite captivating! Loved it :)
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Very haunting and eerie. I really enjoyed the picture that was painted with this poem, with the struggle. So well-written and quite captivating! Loved it :)
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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I thank you so very much for the kind review...dark lord
Comment from pattipac
Your poem is filled with clues that cry out to be heard. But, you hurry on ignoring the warning signs. Filled with pain you push on toward insanity intent to end life on your own terms. Only on the verge of death do you see the bright light that could have been available to you in life. Tragic.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Your poem is filled with clues that cry out to be heard. But, you hurry on ignoring the warning signs. Filled with pain you push on toward insanity intent to end life on your own terms. Only on the verge of death do you see the bright light that could have been available to you in life. Tragic.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Thank you so very much for the kind review...dark lord
Comment from debskatz
Hi Dklrdmcches,
An interesting poem. I see it as a person who's told he has a heart problem or something, should take it easy, but doesn't. He lives, despite the pain, as he sees fit. Reminds me of my favorite poem, "Invictus," by William Earnest Henley. "Out of the night that covers me, black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul."
Thanks for sharing with us!
smiles,
deb
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2012
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Hi Dklrdmcches,
An interesting poem. I see it as a person who's told he has a heart problem or something, should take it easy, but doesn't. He lives, despite the pain, as he sees fit. Reminds me of my favorite poem, "Invictus," by William Earnest Henley. "Out of the night that covers me, black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul."
Thanks for sharing with us!
smiles,
deb
Comment Written 08-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2012
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Thank you so very much for the insightful review. I need to listen to my body more and with this "wake-up" call, I will...dark lord
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Yes, please listen to the "wake-up" call. I have a few ot those, & i like my life, so I have to pay attention. sigh... lol Take care. :-)
