Comment from Dave M

Excellent

Barbara,

No need to be nervous about this post. It's excellent, and it's high time those two got laid. Of course, this will change a lot of things. Bet they end up retired and in the witness protection program...

I couldn't find anything to criticize.

Dave

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2010

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2010

Thank you for your kind review. We shall see how this changes their lives. I have chewed off two fingernails waiting for reviews on this.

reply by Dave M on 19-Mar-2010

Barbara,

You may as well let the fingernails grow back. I see that you've gotten nine excellent reviews. Sometimes, I worry just as much, even though there's no sex in hell.

Dave

Comment from L.lora

Excellent

typo='Steven('s) kisses left her lips'

Barbara this is fabulous, so well
written and so tastefully done yet,
you didn't miss a beat and I feel like
I need a cold shower. If I had six stars
left you definitely could have them all.
No need to worry about the writing in this
addition, it is excellent in all ways. :)Lora

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2010

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2010

Thank you for your very kind words. I appreciate the support. I have already lost two fingernails over this. I don't normally write love scenes.

reply by L.lora on 20-Mar-2010

Yes, I can understand and relate to that (love scenes). I also have struggled with those in my books. YOu did great. Lora

Comment from c_lucas

Excellent

This is a very good "action" chapter. It held this reader's attention. This is very well written with very good imagery and descriptive scheme.
Errors
the men had already sat (set) at the table for dinner.
A moan louder than (the) rest, caused Steven to leave her breasts.

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2010

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2010

Thank you for your review. I wanted the men to sit (sat for past tense) They were physically sitting there, they didn't set the table for eating, of course somebody had to, but I didn't address that. I will fix the other. Thank you for your review and continued support.

reply by c_lucas on 19-Mar-2010

You're welcome, Barbara. Charlie

Comment from Belinda

Excellent

Wow... finally. I sort of wish Steven will back off, though. Maybe it is only my eastern upbringing. But anyway they are officially married. And they have had pent up feeling for so long. It is okay, Barbara, I know you are nervous but let it go...:)

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2010

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2010

Thank you for your kind review. I have already chewed off two fingernails. I don't normally write love scenes so this was difficult.

Comment from Begin Again

Excellent

Barbara

It's about time...I was beginning to think these two weren't human or something. Finally, they came together. Loved the ending...You wrote it!!!! Great job!

smiles, Carol

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2010

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2010

Thank you for your kind review. I am very nervous about writing a love scene. I don't do it often.