Hope
Little life lesson82 total reviews
Comment from ~Dovey
Hi Poet,
I enjoyed your commentary on hope. I'm not sure if you meant to change your rhyme scheme, but it seems that's what you've done once you've hit the near rhymes in the fourth stanza. Then you switch back to the rhyme scheme you've carried through the piece, aa,bb. Then in the last stanza you switch to ab,ab. There is nothing to say you can't do this, but it changes your flow. I'm just not sure if that was your intention? I believe the last stanza is the strongest in your message.
Good luck in the contest.
Kim
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Hi Poet,
I enjoyed your commentary on hope. I'm not sure if you meant to change your rhyme scheme, but it seems that's what you've done once you've hit the near rhymes in the fourth stanza. Then you switch back to the rhyme scheme you've carried through the piece, aa,bb. Then in the last stanza you switch to ab,ab. There is nothing to say you can't do this, but it changes your flow. I'm just not sure if that was your intention? I believe the last stanza is the strongest in your message.
Good luck in the contest.
Kim
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thanks for the kind words
Comment from nancyrabbrose
You did an excellent job with the writing prompt. The flow, the words, the good advice all add up to making a fine poem.
Giving away hope is especially a very creative way to express a profound thought.
Well done.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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You did an excellent job with the writing prompt. The flow, the words, the good advice all add up to making a fine poem.
Giving away hope is especially a very creative way to express a profound thought.
Well done.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Many thanks
Comment from brownies
You did an amazing job here. At first I was feeling sad for the way the person was viewing hope as if he or she had none but rather bitterness or anger. Then when going on it was evident that hope is a cherished possession within the person but sees that it is only a possession that is meant to be given away. The more we give, the more others have, and the more hope there will be around us. I don't agree with your thoughts on truth and faith, but I have to say I really liked this work!
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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You did an amazing job here. At first I was feeling sad for the way the person was viewing hope as if he or she had none but rather bitterness or anger. Then when going on it was evident that hope is a cherished possession within the person but sees that it is only a possession that is meant to be given away. The more we give, the more others have, and the more hope there will be around us. I don't agree with your thoughts on truth and faith, but I have to say I really liked this work!
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Food for thought
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I agree with what you are saying, and I like the idea of giving a homeless person a meal and watch as hope shows in the face. It doesn't hurt of cost much to do something nice and unexpected, and we are beneficiaries as well. As we give, so we get that nice feeling too. Excellent poem, well worded and an excellent contest entry. Good luck! xsx Sandra
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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I agree with what you are saying, and I like the idea of giving a homeless person a meal and watch as hope shows in the face. It doesn't hurt of cost much to do something nice and unexpected, and we are beneficiaries as well. As we give, so we get that nice feeling too. Excellent poem, well worded and an excellent contest entry. Good luck! xsx Sandra
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thanks
Comment from P1
i really like this and think it is a very
strong entry to the contest. the rhyme
is perfect and flows without any glitches
good luck with this i reall enjoyed the read.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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i really like this and think it is a very
strong entry to the contest. the rhyme
is perfect and flows without any glitches
good luck with this i reall enjoyed the read.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thank you much
Comment from Ben Colder
Must agree with the meaning of this contest piece. Work is the secret of success. Anyone can sit back and grieve over yeaterday. I hope you win the contest. You have my vote.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Must agree with the meaning of this contest piece. Work is the secret of success. Anyone can sit back and grieve over yeaterday. I hope you win the contest. You have my vote.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thank you
Comment from Chris Walker
I enjoyed reading your poem written about how. Hope is a lovely concept, but relying on hope/faith to solve all problems is a bit of magical thinking. Well written and thought provoking, good luck in the contest. Chris
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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I enjoyed reading your poem written about how. Hope is a lovely concept, but relying on hope/faith to solve all problems is a bit of magical thinking. Well written and thought provoking, good luck in the contest. Chris
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thanks
Comment from Senyai
My favorite line is third from the last..."Hope only works when you give it away." Very profound. I also like the message, makes one stop and assess the heart. Never a bad thing to do. The picture is a striking accompaniment to this well written verse.
Best to you in the contest with this strong entry.
Senyai
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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My favorite line is third from the last..."Hope only works when you give it away." Very profound. I also like the message, makes one stop and assess the heart. Never a bad thing to do. The picture is a striking accompaniment to this well written verse.
Best to you in the contest with this strong entry.
Senyai
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thank you
Comment from konni
I read this with pleasure and great interest.
Stanzas 1 & 3 & 5 are especially well-done.
In stanza 3, I'm uncertain about "quite"
Stanza 5 "not expected"-- unexpected?
A commendable job and food for thought.
All the best.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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I read this with pleasure and great interest.
Stanzas 1 & 3 & 5 are especially well-done.
In stanza 3, I'm uncertain about "quite"
Stanza 5 "not expected"-- unexpected?
A commendable job and food for thought.
All the best.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thank you much
Comment from CEO2020
I love the illustration. Prepares the reader extremely well for the poem.
"When life gets too tough and you think you can't cope
You can always just sit there and rally some hope
You can call on your faith while you watch the time pass
Or be productive and get off your ass"
Mm...you sound very harsh and angry at the slothful.
"Faith and hope are both used to avoid reality
Truth is pure and destroys individuality
A good life expresses the nature of quality
And beholds creations as they show their beauty"
I take it that you are not godly
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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I love the illustration. Prepares the reader extremely well for the poem.
"When life gets too tough and you think you can't cope
You can always just sit there and rally some hope
You can call on your faith while you watch the time pass
Or be productive and get off your ass"
Mm...you sound very harsh and angry at the slothful.
"Faith and hope are both used to avoid reality
Truth is pure and destroys individuality
A good life expresses the nature of quality
And beholds creations as they show their beauty"
I take it that you are not godly
Comment Written 21-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2016
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Thanks for the review...