Comment from Jazh

Excellent

This is a great poem, Sue...it would have done well in the contest. I like "Masquerading and parading untruths" and the way you have built up to that line (literally). Very kind of you to donate to the contest. :)

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

---

reply by the author on 08-Mar-2009

So glad you saw the "building up to the 10 syllable line". I always intend to do that. It seems to be central for me. Thanks so much for your great review! Sue

Comment from MJMuraco

Excellent

Pablo Picasso's work is perfect for this poem. You did a nice job creating the cruel feeling. Sorry that you missed the contest because this would be a great entry. Oh well, we write because we love it.

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

---

reply by the author on 09-Mar-2009

Yes, even though I missed the deadline, I do love the rictameter and had to write it. Thanks for commenting on that great Picasso! Glad you liked it. And for your great review. With regards, Sue

Comment from jeslaf

Excellent

I've missed many myself, but I hate to enter and then feel UNmotivated and have to write something crappy to fulfill obligation, or, equally bad, waste the money altogether and not show up.

Liked best 'neverminding' as it can be thought of two ways, 'neverminding' as a verb and 'never minding'--liked it. :)

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

---

reply by the author on 09-Mar-2009

You're the first to pick up on the "neverminding"! I was split on which way to write it, but very glad I kept it as a verb. Thanks for highlighting that. And for your great review! With regards, Sue

Comment from amada

Excellent

Oh cheer up, don't be cruel with yourself. (Smile) It's all for fun. This cruel thing is something we all deal in our lives. I liked the Picasso's picture.

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

Comment from Judian James

Excellent

You did review my "Loose" right? Oh, I hear you on this one ... signing up, paying your money and then totally forgetting to enter! Talk about Cruel!! well done

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

---

reply by the author on 09-Mar-2009

No, I missed "Loose"!! How did I do that? My inbox is a mess and I'm so disorganized right now!! Will get on over there now. Thanks for your review, Jude...Sue

Comment from Dklrdmcches

Excellent

this was very well written. great expression felt throughout. the heart is in pain and it shows. the mind wielded a great tool within this well woven poem...DKLRD

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

Comment from jaeladarling

Excellent

Awww, don't you hate it when you keep missing deadlines? I do that too! LOL This would have been a wonderful contestant. Very well written and thought provoking. Thanks for sharing!

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

Comment from Annelisa

Excellent

Too bad you missed the deadline. This is an excellent richtometer. It is smooth and coherent with a clear message. Well done. Annelisa

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

---

reply by the author on 08-Mar-2009

Annelisa, yes...I thought today was deadline and wrote it this morning. I do love a rictameter! Thank you so much for your kind review. Sue

Comment from prodigal

Excellent

I liked this one. It is too bad you missed the deadline for the contest. I like that you began and ended with cruel. I have noticed with repitition on this site, some know how to effectively use it, and some don't. You do- Sam

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

---

reply by the author on 08-Mar-2009

Yeah, thought today was the deadline. Thanks so much for your lovely compliments and review. With warmest regards, Sue :-)

Comment from BethShelby

Excellent

This poem paints a very clear picture of someone who is cruel. You use strong language: selfish, uncaring. You speak of a person who lies and doesn't care about the pain he inflicts on other. You have don't a good job of getting your message across.

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2009

---

reply by the author on 08-Mar-2009

Thank you for your very specific comments on this work. And for your most kind review. With regards, Sue