Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Excellent

A very neat and humorous ending following your enjoyable verse which flowed and rhymed effortlessly. I liked the monorhymes and didn't think the stanzas were asking for too much (well, maybe a little) should your application to be God succeed. Best of luck in the job anyway and the contest! Thanks for sharing this fun post. Debbie

 Comment Written 06-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 07-Dec-2023

Thanks, Debbie. I wonder how many applications have been sent in.

Comment from Paul Manton

Excellent

A really nicely constructed repetition poem with a pleasantly wry twist at the end. You have worked hard and chosen well in giving us all an upgrade - the devil alone in hell is my favorite. That would mean no one would ever commit another sin - and that would mean we would all have to be different from present humans.
And how you would manage that? Yes, your work really would be cut out for you! But living in paradise would be great for a while.
Paul

 Comment Written 06-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 07-Dec-2023

Thanks, Paul. The devil line was also my favorite. That was the only line where the meter was a little off.

reply by Paul Manton on 07-Dec-2023

Yes, but it worked anyway.
Best from Paul

Comment from Douglas Goff

Excellent

This is very nicely done. Great picture to accompany your piece.

Maybe one day all of that is God's plan. Who knows? I sure hope so.

Good luck in your competition!
D

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 Comment Written 06-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 07-Dec-2023

Thanks, Doug. The sooner the better.