Heart Crafted Poems -2021
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Walking the Strand"Musings of an old man -2021
41 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Spencerian sonnet about a meaningful walk along the beach holding hands and talk about life with each other. A relationship sometimes ends before it starts.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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A very well-written Spencerian sonnet about a meaningful walk along the beach holding hands and talk about life with each other. A relationship sometimes ends before it starts.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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Smiling back!
Comment from Gloria ....
This is just so good, J! Your metre has improved immensely. Your classes with Jim have helped and your metre and rhyme is terrific. I thoroughly enjoyed the vibrancy of your poem moving from line to line and the mirthful couplet summed it up beautifully.
Terrific sonnet and I hope to read many more from your quarter.
Just one small typo in your author notes:
Spencerian (Spenserian) Sonnet, a sonnet in ...
Gloria
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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This is just so good, J! Your metre has improved immensely. Your classes with Jim have helped and your metre and rhyme is terrific. I thoroughly enjoyed the vibrancy of your poem moving from line to line and the mirthful couplet summed it up beautifully.
Terrific sonnet and I hope to read many more from your quarter.
Just one small typo in your author notes:
Spencerian (Spenserian) Sonnet, a sonnet in ...
Gloria
Comment Written 18-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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Gloria, I can not express my gratitude enough! Being a natural free verser, as you know I have struggled with meter. Jim's sonnet class among others have been a boon of experiential activities. I am so grateful to him and FanStory for this platform to develop my writing abilities. Your six-star rating is so validating! thank you!
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
This is a lovely lilting Spencerian Sonnet, with well-chosen words and excellent rhyme. The aura of the Strand is well perceived and delineated well in your composition. Thanks for sharing.
Ralf
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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This is a lovely lilting Spencerian Sonnet, with well-chosen words and excellent rhyme. The aura of the Strand is well perceived and delineated well in your composition. Thanks for sharing.
Ralf
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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Ralf, I owe a debt of gratitude to James Bartlett (Pantygnt) for his skill and patience as a student in this classes.
Comment from nancyjam
I enjoyed reading your Spencerian Sonnet. a lovely walk on the beach with
hopes that love will bloom, but like the fickle sea rushes in, but eaves the shore empty. The imagery is lovely and the rhyme and meter excellently
crafted. Great job.
Nancy
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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I enjoyed reading your Spencerian Sonnet. a lovely walk on the beach with
hopes that love will bloom, but like the fickle sea rushes in, but eaves the shore empty. The imagery is lovely and the rhyme and meter excellently
crafted. Great job.
Nancy
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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Nancy, thank you.
Comment from Susan X Smith
I like the humor of the surprise ending. At first, this read like an old-fashioned, predictable piece, but then it jumped into something more contemporary. Good job.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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I like the humor of the surprise ending. At first, this read like an old-fashioned, predictable piece, but then it jumped into something more contemporary. Good job.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2021
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Susan thank you!
Comment from AnnieDawn
I think your class has created a poet of worth because this sonnet is beautifully written. I know that there are several ways to write sonnets and all of them are a bit different. This Spencerian style is smooth and is easy to read. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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I think your class has created a poet of worth because this sonnet is beautifully written. I know that there are several ways to write sonnets and all of them are a bit different. This Spencerian style is smooth and is easy to read. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Annie, thank you 🙏 ! I am so grateful for the amount I have learned in the writing class through FanStory. I am grateful for this six-star review.
Comment from Bill Schott
This Spenserian sonnet, Walking the Strand, has the proper formatting and finds the uniqueness in the short-lived ebb tide landscape.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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This Spenserian sonnet, Walking the Strand, has the proper formatting and finds the uniqueness in the short-lived ebb tide landscape.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Thank you, Bill
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Well am impressed with the perfect metered words here and your rhymes 'calmed' and 'bombed' made me smile, but I love near rhyme and it is a pity this relationship did not working out and you delivered the sentiments here perfectly. This is a perfectly formed sonnet and deserves a six, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Well am impressed with the perfect metered words here and your rhymes 'calmed' and 'bombed' made me smile, but I love near rhyme and it is a pity this relationship did not working out and you delivered the sentiments here perfectly. This is a perfectly formed sonnet and deserves a six, love Dolly x
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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I am very humbled and honored. Thank you so much for your consistent reviews and guidance. I am getting some confidence built in this poetic arena. I am working on my first Italian sonnet now...
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I shall look forward to reading more sonnets from you and awarding you more six stars in the future, love Dolly x
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I shall look forward to reading more sonnets from you and awarding you more six stars in the future, love Dolly x
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I shall look forward to reading more sonnets from you and awarding you more six stars in the future, love Dolly x
Comment from robyn corum
JLR,
hahahaha I'm sorry. I don't mean to laugh at the expense of your poor heart -but I couldn't help it. This piece was fun to read and the ending was awesome. I don't know much about this form of the sonnet - so I shall not offer ideas re: editing. Thanks so much!
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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JLR,
hahahaha I'm sorry. I don't mean to laugh at the expense of your poor heart -but I couldn't help it. This piece was fun to read and the ending was awesome. I don't know much about this form of the sonnet - so I shall not offer ideas re: editing. Thanks so much!
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Thanks much my friend.
Comment from Joanne Gill-Maddick
This is a beautifully written sonnet. Carefree sweethearts view waves above the strand. Such glee comes as two souls enjoy this day. Very nicely done. Great photo selection to go with your words. I Love it.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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This is a beautifully written sonnet. Carefree sweethearts view waves above the strand. Such glee comes as two souls enjoy this day. Very nicely done. Great photo selection to go with your words. I Love it.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Thank you so much!