Heart Cafted Poems - 2020
Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "Passing through your life"Musings of an old man -2020
29 total reviews
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
There would be much suffering in a bruised soul from a relationship gone wrong. Learning to meld together as a couple is difficult and to succeed, both have to be on the same page, and both must be willing to give 60% or more in adjusting. It is not an easy row to hoe.
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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There would be much suffering in a bruised soul from a relationship gone wrong. Learning to meld together as a couple is difficult and to succeed, both have to be on the same page, and both must be willing to give 60% or more in adjusting. It is not an easy row to hoe.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Rebecca thankfully I am not had to bear witness to this in my relationship with my wife of 37 years Whew!
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Ha ha You are indeed blessed.
You wrote it like you suffered this yourself. You sure got inside that man in a splendid way.
Comment from Mastery
Brilliant writing, Jim. From start to finish it is poetically beautiful, like here:
"I felt your soft touch, your warmth receding
creating doubts, I knew you were succeeding
I tired so, of the constant unfettered flack
my love songs refrain were not misleading
My soul is bruised."
"My soul is bruised." is key in this one.
Good job.
: ) Bob
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Brilliant writing, Jim. From start to finish it is poetically beautiful, like here:
"I felt your soft touch, your warmth receding
creating doubts, I knew you were succeeding
I tired so, of the constant unfettered flack
my love songs refrain were not misleading
My soul is bruised."
"My soul is bruised." is key in this one.
Good job.
: ) Bob
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Smiling back my dear friend! Thank you
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Passing through, sometimes we are frightened by this idea that we are missing so much from what we could do. You have capture very well in the last stanza :"Silly how little I want to bemoan
or feel the need to cry out a groan
lamenting, I need to learn to abstain
from companionship when I create pain
accepting that it is my life I must own
Just passing through." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Passing through, sometimes we are frightened by this idea that we are missing so much from what we could do. You have capture very well in the last stanza :"Silly how little I want to bemoan
or feel the need to cry out a groan
lamenting, I need to learn to abstain
from companionship when I create pain
accepting that it is my life I must own
Just passing through." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Thank you!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
When a relationship is not fundamentally working, it is best to move on. Life on one's own can be a challenge, but you find out what really makes you happy. A well rhymed write and I did see the meter improving here, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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When a relationship is not fundamentally working, it is best to move on. Life on one's own can be a challenge, but you find out what really makes you happy. A well rhymed write and I did see the meter improving here, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Dolly, thank you so much! Practice, practice. LOL
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Wow, JL, so much regret and sadness wrapped up in this one, sir -- makes the reader almost catch their breath as they 'pass through' with you.... well done! ;) Thanx for sharing your Double Rondeau! ;) Yvette
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Wow, JL, so much regret and sadness wrapped up in this one, sir -- makes the reader almost catch their breath as they 'pass through' with you.... well done! ;) Thanx for sharing your Double Rondeau! ;) Yvette
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Yvette something was stirred on my early morning sitting, the results are sometimes shocking as I write.
Comment from Becky Kern-Taylor
Beautiful but so sad. I hope this wasn't a true experience. If it was sorry for the anguish you went through. Relationships are difficult. If, or when, you finally find someone who makes things easier, scoop them up. I told all my kids, before you marry, make sure this is who you want to spend the rest of your life with. No divorces yet, thank God!
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Beautiful but so sad. I hope this wasn't a true experience. If it was sorry for the anguish you went through. Relationships are difficult. If, or when, you finally find someone who makes things easier, scoop them up. I told all my kids, before you marry, make sure this is who you want to spend the rest of your life with. No divorces yet, thank God!
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Becky, whew no, no thank God! something was stirred on my early morning sitting, the results are sometimes shocking as I write.
Comment from Sally Law
Excellent double rondeau, dear J. I love the theme and the illustration. It left me wanting more.
Sending you my best today as always, and best wishes for the challenge,
Sal xo
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reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Excellent double rondeau, dear J. I love the theme and the illustration. It left me wanting more.
Sending you my best today as always, and best wishes for the challenge,
Sal xo
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Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Sal. Thank you very much! This was a challenge for certain.
Comment from Beverly A McBride
My, this is a complicated meter! I so sympathize with the feeling expressed here. I'm such a dork! I feel this way after every failed attempt at trusting and losing. After a while, the deep hurt fades, and I find I'm willing to try again. Hopefully a bit smarter. This angst is a source of lots of life philosophy and writing. After all the failures, I still believe in love. And there's someone out there just for me. Don't lose hope. Do be skeptical until you aren't anymore. Then take the chance. Don't give up.
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reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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My, this is a complicated meter! I so sympathize with the feeling expressed here. I'm such a dork! I feel this way after every failed attempt at trusting and losing. After a while, the deep hurt fades, and I find I'm willing to try again. Hopefully a bit smarter. This angst is a source of lots of life philosophy and writing. After all the failures, I still believe in love. And there's someone out there just for me. Don't lose hope. Do be skeptical until you aren't anymore. Then take the chance. Don't give up.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Thank you for your time taken to review and comment on my work.
Comment from Mary Furlong
I am beyond impressed by this interesting and compelling poem. What a challenge and how wonderfully you met it! The emotional content is amazing as well.
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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I am beyond impressed by this interesting and compelling poem. What a challenge and how wonderfully you met it! The emotional content is amazing as well.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Nary, My, I am so grateful! Something was stirred on my early morning sitting, the results are sometimes shocking as I write.
