When We Were Once Five
Contest Entry: Children's Poem37 total reviews
Comment from Nescher Pyscher
Suppose we never learned these nursery rhymes
Could we recall those long ago times? (Your meter, nice and smooth throughout, with a clean, polished feel, gets a little chunky and disordered here.)
Our lives would be much smaller, wouldn't they?
:0)
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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Suppose we never learned these nursery rhymes
Could we recall those long ago times? (Your meter, nice and smooth throughout, with a clean, polished feel, gets a little chunky and disordered here.)
Our lives would be much smaller, wouldn't they?
:0)
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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I agree: too chunky! So...I editted it, and in place of "nursery" I wrote "simple." Funny how one syllable can make a difference. Thank you for stopping by and your review. diane
Comment from amada
What a great poem Mrs. T. I will send it to one of my grand daughters, the one who is precisely five years old. What a great poem, even for us grown-ups; I still wish upon stars.
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What a great poem Mrs. T. I will send it to one of my grand daughters, the one who is precisely five years old. What a great poem, even for us grown-ups; I still wish upon stars.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from Diny
You get full marks even thought ithink a few more Suess-ish refrences are needed - Like Sneeds or Horton hears a Who? even Whoville... There are many more possiblilities for this- but the fact you got it back to what if and manners- was brillant!- Good LUCK!- Di
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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You get full marks even thought ithink a few more Suess-ish refrences are needed - Like Sneeds or Horton hears a Who? even Whoville... There are many more possiblilities for this- but the fact you got it back to what if and manners- was brillant!- Good LUCK!- Di
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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Hello Friend! On the way to work this morning I wrote a line for Horton!!!! So much fun. Glad you enjoyed! diane
Comment from Signaler
Hello Mrs. KT...a very charming child's poem. You were very correct in all of it except....here is where I nit pick, only a little....
and the dish ran away with the spoon.
it was the cat and the fiddle.
but as I said, Charming!
Angels to Watch over You,
As Always, Signaler
review....yeah! that's the way....changing your stars. smile
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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Hello Mrs. KT...a very charming child's poem. You were very correct in all of it except....here is where I nit pick, only a little....
and the dish ran away with the spoon.
it was the cat and the fiddle.
but as I said, Charming!
Angels to Watch over You,
As Always, Signaler
review....yeah! that's the way....changing your stars. smile
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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Oh!!! Too Funny!! I kept saying that line over and over!! What a dolt I am! Of course the dish ran away with the spoon! Thank you for pointing tht out and for enjoying my offering! diane
Comment from ulster3
Hi Mrs. KT.
This is absolutely wonderful. You have well caotured the essence of the contest, and the inclusion of the nursery rhymes is irresistable. Best to you in this contest. Fondly, Rebecca
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Hi Mrs. KT.
This is absolutely wonderful. You have well caotured the essence of the contest, and the inclusion of the nursery rhymes is irresistable. Best to you in this contest. Fondly, Rebecca
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from Bryana
Dear Diane, what a delightful
poem you've written. It certainly
brought back memories when my sons
were little children and I would
read all those stories to them.
Reading your poem was a pleasure.
Thank you for sharing.
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Dear Diane, what a delightful
poem you've written. It certainly
brought back memories when my sons
were little children and I would
read all those stories to them.
Reading your poem was a pleasure.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from starkat
Hi Diane,
Delightful poem and great contest entry. Beautiful rhythm and choice of rhymes as you incorporate so many of the poems and stories we learned around age 5, an impressionable age as those stories and poems seem to remain in our memory banks for our entire lifefime. Each child's poem kindles a spark of recognition as we recall the story within the poem. They all seem to have a shared universal appeal, especially here in the US. I'm not sure how many other countries teach their children these poems, but the English speaking ones for sure do. These poems really widened our imaginations and opened doors for fantasy, adventure and fun. And then we pass them down from generation to generation so they will continue to delight and entertain everyone.
Lovely fantasy artwork you chose enhances the poem even more. Enjoyed your set of suppositions and the order you placed them in.
Outstanding job..so, I suppose a 'sixer' is in order..
This poem should be a super strong contender in this contest.
Well done.
Cheers,
Art
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Hi Diane,
Delightful poem and great contest entry. Beautiful rhythm and choice of rhymes as you incorporate so many of the poems and stories we learned around age 5, an impressionable age as those stories and poems seem to remain in our memory banks for our entire lifefime. Each child's poem kindles a spark of recognition as we recall the story within the poem. They all seem to have a shared universal appeal, especially here in the US. I'm not sure how many other countries teach their children these poems, but the English speaking ones for sure do. These poems really widened our imaginations and opened doors for fantasy, adventure and fun. And then we pass them down from generation to generation so they will continue to delight and entertain everyone.
Lovely fantasy artwork you chose enhances the poem even more. Enjoyed your set of suppositions and the order you placed them in.
Outstanding job..so, I suppose a 'sixer' is in order..
This poem should be a super strong contender in this contest.
Well done.
Cheers,
Art
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from rhymelord
Well, I'll suppose I will have to forgive you for the heinous crime of your lack of end punctuation, because in the end you have created a delightful, touching little trip down memory lane with beautiful rhyme and metre. I promise not to let any of your old pupils know. Good luck in the contest.
Regards
Reg
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Well, I'll suppose I will have to forgive you for the heinous crime of your lack of end punctuation, because in the end you have created a delightful, touching little trip down memory lane with beautiful rhyme and metre. I promise not to let any of your old pupils know. Good luck in the contest.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from joan marie
Well, this sure fits the bill to a tee. I just heard someone on a movie sing Somewhere Over the Rainbow and I thought about that as I read. Where would we be without all the lessons we never knew we were learning? joan marie
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Well, this sure fits the bill to a tee. I just heard someone on a movie sing Somewhere Over the Rainbow and I thought about that as I read. Where would we be without all the lessons we never knew we were learning? joan marie
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from knowledge
Now, I had to give you six stars, count them, for this most delightful poem. My wife and I are very successful Dyslexia tutors. We enjoy being able to open the printed word for these young and old dyslexic people.
Thank You My Friend,
Knowledge
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Now, I had to give you six stars, count them, for this most delightful poem. My wife and I are very successful Dyslexia tutors. We enjoy being able to open the printed word for these young and old dyslexic people.
Thank You My Friend,
Knowledge
Comment Written 04-Feb-2009
