The Woman on the Train
A woman takes the train to work34 total reviews
Comment from Michele Harber
That was a kick in the gut. As a New Yorker who rides the subway, I've seen such people on a regular basis, and rarely given them anything. Rather, when I see the homeless people staring too directly at me, or talking to themselves, I do tend to let fear take over, and I walk away. I guess the biggest difference is that I don't do so without sympathy for their plight but, with all the stories I hear on the news, fear way more than sympathy has controlled my actions.
This is a very powerful poem, its best feature being that it humanizes the homeless population and, to a degree, dehumanizes the ones who look at them with disdain or walk away.
Your story is very moving, and truly brings the reader in. It's very easy to see what you describe, and to put oneself in the "What would I do?" position. As hard as this story (not your poetry) is to read, it's equally necessary.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
  |
That was a kick in the gut. As a New Yorker who rides the subway, I've seen such people on a regular basis, and rarely given them anything. Rather, when I see the homeless people staring too directly at me, or talking to themselves, I do tend to let fear take over, and I walk away. I guess the biggest difference is that I don't do so without sympathy for their plight but, with all the stories I hear on the news, fear way more than sympathy has controlled my actions.
This is a very powerful poem, its best feature being that it humanizes the homeless population and, to a degree, dehumanizes the ones who look at them with disdain or walk away.
Your story is very moving, and truly brings the reader in. It's very easy to see what you describe, and to put oneself in the "What would I do?" position. As hard as this story (not your poetry) is to read, it's equally necessary.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful review
and excellent stars
Your reviews are deep and thoughtful, and I appreciate them
-
I give those reviews because your work truly deserves them.
Comment from Rachelle Allen
There are so many "in need" anymore that trying to help can begin to feel overwhelming. I wouldn't call her a "jerk" for it anymore than the people who are homeless are "jerks" for being who they are. I know this is fictitious, but it a little bit rankled me.
Still, you did an excellent job with the meter and rhyming!
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2024
|
There are so many "in need" anymore that trying to help can begin to feel overwhelming. I wouldn't call her a "jerk" for it anymore than the people who are homeless are "jerks" for being who they are. I know this is fictitious, but it a little bit rankled me.
Still, you did an excellent job with the meter and rhyming!
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful comments and a great review
Comment from BOO ghost
Allow me to indulge into this story poem. He took some codeine for his pain. Hahaha! Rhymes well! Oh, you not the woman on the train. There are more homeless people since, illegal immigrants are dumped on the streets with a cellphone. Seems like a well written poem. Count your lucky stars!
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
 |
Allow me to indulge into this story poem. He took some codeine for his pain. Hahaha! Rhymes well! Oh, you not the woman on the train. There are more homeless people since, illegal immigrants are dumped on the streets with a cellphone. Seems like a well written poem. Count your lucky stars!
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
-
Thank you so much for these shiny stars and for your wonderful comments. You made my day.
Comment from lyenochka
This isn't any new phenomenon as Jesus teaches about it in the parable of the Good Samaritan. But these days, Good Samaritans do get sued and we have had homeless people kill people on the trains. So it's not so easy reach out and help. It's best to do it as the whole church or give money another organization who help people on the street.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
|
This isn't any new phenomenon as Jesus teaches about it in the parable of the Good Samaritan. But these days, Good Samaritans do get sued and we have had homeless people kill people on the trains. So it's not so easy reach out and help. It's best to do it as the whole church or give money another organization who help people on the street.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful review
and excellent stars
Comment from jmdg1954
Many times people have good intentions to do the right thing or a good deed. But when push comes to shove so many fall into not doing any of what they thought of doing.
I'm the same way at times... all talk, no action.
John
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
|
Many times people have good intentions to do the right thing or a good deed. But when push comes to shove so many fall into not doing any of what they thought of doing.
I'm the same way at times... all talk, no action.
John
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
part.
From the time that I awake, til the time I lay down
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Once again, beautifully crafted to convey this sad story in the most impactful way. So many of us shy away from getting involved and hope the problem will simply go away. On this occasion it did, most probably forever. What I really like about your poetry is that the rhyming never feels forced in any way. I would however suggest that when-ere be whene'er (the apostrophe replacing the 'v' and no hyphon) Well done and thanks, Pam! Debbie
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
|
Once again, beautifully crafted to convey this sad story in the most impactful way. So many of us shy away from getting involved and hope the problem will simply go away. On this occasion it did, most probably forever. What I really like about your poetry is that the rhyming never feels forced in any way. I would however suggest that when-ere be whene'er (the apostrophe replacing the 'v' and no hyphon) Well done and thanks, Pam! Debbie
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful review
and excellent stars
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Pam,
This is such a sad story, both for the woman and the poor in the woods.
It could have and should have been different. She definitely isn't Christian if she didn't even try to help.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Have a great rest of the week.
Joan
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
|
Hi Pam,
This is such a sad story, both for the woman and the poor in the woods.
It could have and should have been different. She definitely isn't Christian if she didn't even try to help.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Have a great rest of the week.
Joan
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful review
and excellent stars
Comment from LJbutterfly
You have crafted a really meaningful story with a necessary final message. We all have seen people in need of some type of help. They may not be homeless, they just need some type of assistance. How often do we think of them for a brief moment and then fall asleep to the idea of helping? Thank you for a thought-provoking story in a poem.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
|
You have crafted a really meaningful story with a necessary final message. We all have seen people in need of some type of help. They may not be homeless, they just need some type of assistance. How often do we think of them for a brief moment and then fall asleep to the idea of helping? Thank you for a thought-provoking story in a poem.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful review
and excellent stars
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I've gotten to where I keep food with me so when I encounter homeless people I can pass it to them. We, as Christians, should do a lot more for the homeless and I believe we can. Great poem.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
|
I've gotten to where I keep food with me so when I encounter homeless people I can pass it to them. We, as Christians, should do a lot more for the homeless and I believe we can. Great poem.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful review
and excellent stars
Comment from Karen Dougherty Estep
Wow! This is an amazing poem with a different twist. I enjoyed your descriptive prose and found myself actually wondering how someone could be that cold hearted. Keep writing!
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
|
Wow! This is an amazing poem with a different twist. I enjoyed your descriptive prose and found myself actually wondering how someone could be that cold hearted. Keep writing!
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for your wonderful review
and excellent stars
