Detour
Viewing comments for Prologue "Old Reliable, Rachelle's Version"Two very real women in not so real situation.
35 total reviews
Comment from papa55mike
The story sounds like my brother and I. I have a ratty old Jeep with no AC, and he has a new Subaru. What a wonderfully written story and a great idea. Best of luck with your writing! Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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The story sounds like my brother and I. I have a ratty old Jeep with no AC, and he has a new Subaru. What a wonderfully written story and a great idea. Best of luck with your writing! Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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Thanks, Mike! It DOES sound like your brother and you! I hope you've checked out Gretchen's side of this tale, as well (GW Hargis) because, just like when brothers tell the same story to their mom, the versions are definitely not identical!! I appreciate the nice review here. xoxo
Comment from Liz O'Neill
This is a good foreshadowing the reader will be leaning forward to try and hear what's going on: "I always become wary whenever Gretchen hedges and then uses the words 'Here's the thing.'" This reminds me of when we were kids. We used to frantically say, "Daddy daddy you've got to stop." My mother cleaned things up, we got on our way and then the other of us yelled, Now I got to throw up." Daddy Daddy you got to stop.
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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This is a good foreshadowing the reader will be leaning forward to try and hear what's going on: "I always become wary whenever Gretchen hedges and then uses the words 'Here's the thing.'" This reminds me of when we were kids. We used to frantically say, "Daddy daddy you've got to stop." My mother cleaned things up, we got on our way and then the other of us yelled, Now I got to throw up." Daddy Daddy you got to stop.
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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Wow! You guys were not exactly the best road trip crew, were you?! Thanks for the fun review, Liz.(you know, 'fun' because it wasn't MY children or MY car during one of MY vacations... Funny the way that works, right?)
If you haven't also read/reviewed Gretchen's posting of this chapter, don't forget to do so. GW HARGIS. In fact, if you fan us both, then you'll receive the notifications every time we post our newest additions!
Thank
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Fanning an doing
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Wonderful!!!
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Fantastic!!
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***Smile***
Comment from Wendy G
This is such a fun and fascinating thing to do. What a brilliant idea. I can't wait to see what happens as it definitely will with the two of you joining together. Off to a great start. Excellent descriptions ( very realistic re spewing!) Well done!
Wendy
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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This is such a fun and fascinating thing to do. What a brilliant idea. I can't wait to see what happens as it definitely will with the two of you joining together. Off to a great start. Excellent descriptions ( very realistic re spewing!) Well done!
Wendy
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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Hahaha. It's so fun to put words (I was going to add "and vomit," but I decided not to be so crass...) into Gretchen's mouth!! Thanks for the nice review, Wendy. xoxox
Comment from Steve Foreman
Brilliantly funny and well written. The chopping and changing kept me reading to see what the hell would be the conclusion of this potentially disasterous road trip - and when it came it was hilarious! Well done!
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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Brilliantly funny and well written. The chopping and changing kept me reading to see what the hell would be the conclusion of this potentially disasterous road trip - and when it came it was hilarious! Well done!
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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I hope you read Gretchen's side, too, Steve. She's hilarious with the way she creates pictures. Thanks for the fun review. xo
Comment from judiverse
I hope this story will continue. I was intrigued by the thought of being rescued by Amish people in horse and buggy. (There are plenty of them in Indiana.) The contrast in automobiles is humorous. My vehicle would have been an ancient gray Lincoln. Is there really a FanStory convention? Wouldn't it be fun to go and meet some of the people whose writing you've read for years. I also enjoyed the bit about the clothing. I can't wear high heels but admire those who can. And your hat sounds interesting--black and leopard. You would impress in that outfit. I wish more people would dress like that. Very entertaining story. Since this is fiction, I would love to be at the FS Conference. Make it happen! judi
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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I hope this story will continue. I was intrigued by the thought of being rescued by Amish people in horse and buggy. (There are plenty of them in Indiana.) The contrast in automobiles is humorous. My vehicle would have been an ancient gray Lincoln. Is there really a FanStory convention? Wouldn't it be fun to go and meet some of the people whose writing you've read for years. I also enjoyed the bit about the clothing. I can't wear high heels but admire those who can. And your hat sounds interesting--black and leopard. You would impress in that outfit. I wish more people would dress like that. Very entertaining story. Since this is fiction, I would love to be at the FS Conference. Make it happen! judi
Comment Written 25-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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Well, that's IF "they" make it there, of course!!
For the record, I do NOT own a 2024 S-class Mercedes! My ride is a 2020 Toyota Camry that's deep dark tealish black with chips of golden mica mixed into her paint job. For that reason, her name is Sparkle Allen.
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My car doesn't have a name. Sometimes I call her the old dear. I hope they end up hitching a ride in the Amish buggy. Love your details in this. They add humor to the story. jud
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Thank you, Judi! oxox
Comment from LJbutterfly
This sounds like a fun project...the type of thing that allows you to reach deep into your imagination and come out with all sorts of creative gems. A FanStory conference is the perfect destination and you are dressed the part. The 2024 Mercedes S-Class sedan would have been perfect. However, I will search out Gretchen's side of the story. This is going to be big fun.
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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This sounds like a fun project...the type of thing that allows you to reach deep into your imagination and come out with all sorts of creative gems. A FanStory conference is the perfect destination and you are dressed the part. The 2024 Mercedes S-Class sedan would have been perfect. However, I will search out Gretchen's side of the story. This is going to be big fun.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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And we just happened upon the idea last night when we were chatting on Facebook Messenger!! And voila! Just like that, we're off on the adventure. I love Gretchen's writing, so I'm very happy to be co-authoring this.
Thank you for the delightful review! I hope it's a fun ride for us all, with our imaginations running wild.
xxox
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I am very tight when giving six stars but with this tale I found no reason to keep my sixes reserved or unused. I look forward to hearing her take on the turn of events
And should I get nearer to NYC I'll let you drive!
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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I am very tight when giving six stars but with this tale I found no reason to keep my sixes reserved or unused. I look forward to hearing her take on the turn of events
And should I get nearer to NYC I'll let you drive!
Comment Written 25-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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Yes, definitely do that!
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
First of all, a national FanStory conference? How come I've never heard of such a thing, and will there be another one? I'm in the dark about this matter and without my form-fitting leopard dress and 3-1/2" heels!
What is the name of "her side of the story" so we can also look for that. I imagine she'll have something to say about all of your hats:-)
xoxo
PT
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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First of all, a national FanStory conference? How come I've never heard of such a thing, and will there be another one? I'm in the dark about this matter and without my form-fitting leopard dress and 3-1/2" heels!
What is the name of "her side of the story" so we can also look for that. I imagine she'll have something to say about all of your hats:-)
xoxo
PT
Comment Written 25-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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It's Gretchen Hargis! check it out and review her, too!! Thanks for your review...even though your greatest take-away was my form-fitting dress and high heels!! lol You really are a sicko.
Oh, and you've probably never heard of the National FS Conference because at the top of the announcement, it reads, in huge red letters: DO NOT TELL PAM LONSDALE. WE AREN'T INVITING HER SICKO ASS TO THIS!!!
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Now you've hurt my feelings:-(
But wait, they'll have you? Now that's sick.
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They just couldn't take a sicko overload, you see. You'll get invited next year, and I'll be off the guest list.
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
When I read Gretchen's story it said multi person book so i wrote chapter two. I did not know it was just you and her. Good thing I checked your story before I posted. You can read it anyway. Both of your stories are good. Karen
In the middle of absolutely nowhere, with no hope to be had, I was crying like I had lost my dog when Rachelle and I heard a rumbling. We saw cattle, and horses with riders! We are saved, at least I hope so.
Zelda Strindmeyer saved our trip. She had seen a young calf skedaddle in our direction. She had a face that should be sculpted in clay. She was at least 70 if she was a day ample but firm. As she slid down her horse " Attila" she said cell phones don't work out here, but that she would use her satellite phone to get us picked up, and her guys would see what the problem was and we could go up to the house.
There should be another name for her house. She had no idea how many rooms it had, but looked like the senior class at my high school could move in with room to spare.
She said the bigger the spread got, the more people they needed, and since everyone needed housing, they just kept adding on. They fed us, watered us, and told us all kinds of stories, some true, and, I expect some not. Our mood was vastly improved.
It was the water pump, after all. She wouldn't accept money; she said she didn't need it, but since we were writers, we could earn our supper by telling them some new stories.
Rachelle and I pulled out our computers and kept them entertained all night. We were a big hit. Rusty gave me some long looks. I wonder if he is near-sighted.
They asked us to stay a while, but we had places to be. But we said we might stop back on our way home. They promised us all the ribs and BBQ corn we could eat if we did.
We left in the morning happy, well fed, and with good directions and pointed in the right direction. I even let Rachelle drive.
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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When I read Gretchen's story it said multi person book so i wrote chapter two. I did not know it was just you and her. Good thing I checked your story before I posted. You can read it anyway. Both of your stories are good. Karen
In the middle of absolutely nowhere, with no hope to be had, I was crying like I had lost my dog when Rachelle and I heard a rumbling. We saw cattle, and horses with riders! We are saved, at least I hope so.
Zelda Strindmeyer saved our trip. She had seen a young calf skedaddle in our direction. She had a face that should be sculpted in clay. She was at least 70 if she was a day ample but firm. As she slid down her horse " Attila" she said cell phones don't work out here, but that she would use her satellite phone to get us picked up, and her guys would see what the problem was and we could go up to the house.
There should be another name for her house. She had no idea how many rooms it had, but looked like the senior class at my high school could move in with room to spare.
She said the bigger the spread got, the more people they needed, and since everyone needed housing, they just kept adding on. They fed us, watered us, and told us all kinds of stories, some true, and, I expect some not. Our mood was vastly improved.
It was the water pump, after all. She wouldn't accept money; she said she didn't need it, but since we were writers, we could earn our supper by telling them some new stories.
Rachelle and I pulled out our computers and kept them entertained all night. We were a big hit. Rusty gave me some long looks. I wonder if he is near-sighted.
They asked us to stay a while, but we had places to be. But we said we might stop back on our way home. They promised us all the ribs and BBQ corn we could eat if we did.
We left in the morning happy, well fed, and with good directions and pointed in the right direction. I even let Rachelle drive.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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Thanks.
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:-)
Comment from Cindy Decker 3
Rachelle,
Once again you've written a great story.
I love your genuine dialogue, and your brash writing style.
Tell me: when was this Fanstory Conference? How many attended? From all parts of the globe? Was it fun???
Good luck with your story, Rochelle.
Cindy
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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Rachelle,
Once again you've written a great story.
I love your genuine dialogue, and your brash writing style.
Tell me: when was this Fanstory Conference? How many attended? From all parts of the globe? Was it fun???
Good luck with your story, Rochelle.
Cindy
Comment Written 25-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2024
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Well, you'll just have to wait and see, Cindy!! (Did you read Gretchen's version, too?)
Thanks for the fun review; I enjoyed it very much. xo
