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Silent Voices

Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "Crossing "
Verses of personification

26 total reviews 
Comment from gansach
Excellent
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This is a lovely example of a Wabi-Sabi poem. I have always liked the philosophy of wabi-sabi, the beauty of imperfection--and the practice of repairing broken objects with gold to accent the beauty in the flaws. Your broken oak becomes a beautiful natural bridge and the artwork illustrates it perfectly. Wonderful!

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
    Thank you so much! Xoxo
Comment from Bill Schott
Excellent
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This haiku, Crossing, presented with a 4-5-4 formatting, has the proper set up and shows nature creating a path between land separated by a river of division. Nice.

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
    Thank you, Bill!
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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I think there's nothing better than when God describes as sifting gold among the dust, rough diamonds that have not been cut, prepared for the master to bring the value to a broken vessel, beautifully written Jessica, , blessings Roy

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 Comment Written 30-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
    Thank you so much, Roy! Xoxo
reply by royowen on 30-Apr-2024
    Pleasure
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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It's a "fallen bridge" or a "bridge because of a fall." It would be good if we could be bridges for others after we fall. Maybe that's why we leave behind poems.

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 Comment Written 30-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
    Thank you, Helen! Xo
Comment from isabelteeth
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I absolutely adore this. It's so beautiful. You have a great sense of wording. The imagery you create is beautiful. You do so much with so little. I've seen so many unfortunate haiku, but yours is awesome and emotional. Thanks for sharing!

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 04-May-2024
    Thank you, that truly means so much to me!! Xoxo
Comment from kahpot
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I am reading your poem then reading the rules for the prompt, and found that the broken is/has become useful, I was getting confused with
"Repaired with gold" (in the notes) so I just went back and read your words for what they are, how very clever, hard sometimes to give a six for short works, but not this time, very well written, (broken can still be useful) love it****kahpot

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 04-May-2024
    This means the world, thank you so much!!
    Xoxo
    Jess