Panpipes
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Panpipes - Chapter 13"A Novella
25 total reviews
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
Have you given thought to writing for my contest?
"Let's Kill Karen" I must die in the story. You don't have to be the one to kill me. But there must be humor in the story. I can die in my sleep, then my pompous sister Kathleen can trip and fall in the open grave, That is humor. Check it out. Good story. Karen
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Have you given thought to writing for my contest?
"Let's Kill Karen" I must die in the story. You don't have to be the one to kill me. But there must be humor in the story. I can die in my sleep, then my pompous sister Kathleen can trip and fall in the open grave, That is humor. Check it out. Good story. Karen
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Good luck with your contest, Karen. I'm fully occupied with this story at the moment, so won't be able to participate. Nonetheless, it's an intriguing challenge.
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:-)
Comment from Julie Fudge Smith1
This is an intriguing story. I jumped right in and found it easy to become immersed in the story (even though it was chapter 13 and I hadn't read the summary beforehand).
The scene describing the sores on the elephant was particularly well written. It had sufficient detail for me to understand the distress of the animal, but wasn't so gruesome that I had to quit reading. That is a delicate balance to strike and Tony hit it just right.
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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This is an intriguing story. I jumped right in and found it easy to become immersed in the story (even though it was chapter 13 and I hadn't read the summary beforehand).
The scene describing the sores on the elephant was particularly well written. It had sufficient detail for me to understand the distress of the animal, but wasn't so gruesome that I had to quit reading. That is a delicate balance to strike and Tony hit it just right.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Thanks so much for dropping by, Julie, and for your affirming review. It's always great to have a fresh pair of eyes viewing my work. Best wishes, Tony.
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If you have a moment, and are interested, could you check out my chapter for the First Chapter contest? It's titled "The Boy Who Danced For The Moon." Thank-you! All the best, Julie
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi there,
Another great chapter in this tale of hijinks and disasters! I'm enjoying your character development and use of dialogue to move the storyline along. Thank you for sharing - I'm looking forward to more,
~MP~
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Hi there,
Another great chapter in this tale of hijinks and disasters! I'm enjoying your character development and use of dialogue to move the storyline along. Thank you for sharing - I'm looking forward to more,
~MP~
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Thanks, Patty. These two still have some sorting out to do if I'm to contrive a happy ending! I appreciate your comments about the dialogue and character development. All the best, Tony.
Comment from Mrs. KT
Good morning, Tony,
What I appreciated greatly about this chapter is the meticulous detail throughout. Your sense of detail is exceptional, from Bapit's difficulty maneuvering on his crutches, right down to the unkept nature of the trekking lodge's pathways:
"They set out down the path, brushing bougainvillaea vines aside. Feathery fronds of lalang grass had begun to invade the herbaceous beds, and the lawns were sorely in need of a trim. Bapit was surprised by how overgrown the gardens had become. Chanarong had always made sure the trekking lodge was in tip-top condition for the tourists."
And I also appreciated the need for Ayesha to learn/know/ become familiar with the social customs and mores of Bapit's country.
Much enjoyed, Tony,
Thank you for sharing!
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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Good morning, Tony,
What I appreciated greatly about this chapter is the meticulous detail throughout. Your sense of detail is exceptional, from Bapit's difficulty maneuvering on his crutches, right down to the unkept nature of the trekking lodge's pathways:
"They set out down the path, brushing bougainvillaea vines aside. Feathery fronds of lalang grass had begun to invade the herbaceous beds, and the lawns were sorely in need of a trim. Bapit was surprised by how overgrown the gardens had become. Chanarong had always made sure the trekking lodge was in tip-top condition for the tourists."
And I also appreciated the need for Ayesha to learn/know/ become familiar with the social customs and mores of Bapit's country.
Much enjoyed, Tony,
Thank you for sharing!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Thanks, Diane. Such an affirming review! It's made my day. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Hello Tony. I love the idea of writing a story with the main character being wheelchair-bound! I, too am wheelchair bound and yet full of life and vim and viger. I love also the ease of reading your work because of the large type my eyesight is poor so I can enjoy this story in all of its details.
Thanks for sharing this entertaining and happily ever after sort of tale.
Jesse
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Hello Tony. I love the idea of writing a story with the main character being wheelchair-bound! I, too am wheelchair bound and yet full of life and vim and viger. I love also the ease of reading your work because of the large type my eyesight is poor so I can enjoy this story in all of its details.
Thanks for sharing this entertaining and happily ever after sort of tale.
Jesse
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2024
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Thanks so much for this review, Jesse. I'm on unfamiliar ground with this, so if I commit any howlers let me know! You're not alone in welcoming the larger print size. I need it, too, if only to spot where I've put a comma where I meant to put a period. Keep well! All good wishes, Tony.
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You're welcome, Tony.
I'll remember to let you know.
Take care,
Jesse
