Reviews from

Panpipes

Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Panpipes - Chapter 11"
A Novella

24 total reviews 
Comment from Sankey
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Another great chapter. You are really keeping us "locked in" on this great drama with all it's twists and turns. Just one query? dispel the "charnel??" images
Never heard this word before or is it a typo?

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2024
    Many thanks for your review and the sixth star, Geoffrey.
    In medieval times, a charnel house was a building or vault in which corpses or bones were piled, a place associated with violent death. It can be shortened to charnel when used as an adjective. Now there's a piece of useless information for you! LOL
reply by Sankey on 14-Jan-2024
    Thanks mate. I knew there was probably a reasonable explanation.
Comment from lyenochka
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I like that metaphor and hope she knows that she's a "swimmer in a sea full of sharks" like that lawyer she's meeting with.

Honestly, I didn't like your Ayesha character until now. She seemed very self-centered and shallow but we see a completely different person here. She's suddenly intelligent and able to make good assessment. And she's able to overcome her phobia of physical deformity in her love and care for Bapit. She's considerate and even thought up the learning of the panpipes so that Bapit could be elevated as the teacher and overcome his humiliation of being handicapped. Great chapter!

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
    Thanks so much for your kind words and the sixth star. I've always struggled with creating a believable character arc, and I'm hoping I get it right this time around with Ayesha, and possibly with Bapit.
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Ayesha and Bapit are starting again the game of life and survival, and in the same time, a new world as a widow awaits her. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings and the next chapter.

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 Comment Written 14-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 16-Jan-2024
    Thanks, Iza. I appreciate your comments and encouragement. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Navada
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I was wondering when the panpipes would make a reappearance! I really like that they have done so as a positive quid pro quo to get poor Bapit back on his ... foot. I'll be interested to see what happens with Ayesha's finances and to get an update on poor Abharamu.

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 Comment Written 14-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2024
    Thanks, Navada. Appreciated. Have just read the chilling first chapter of your novel. Will try to follow it in due course. Looks good.