Untethered Dreams
two line poetry29 total reviews
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
This is a great contest entry, Melissa. The picture is awesome to pair with your well chosen words. Great job with the requirements of the contest.
Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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This is a great contest entry, Melissa. The picture is awesome to pair with your well chosen words. Great job with the requirements of the contest.
Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Hello Jan. Thank you. It did challenge me because of the limited syllable count. :). I like challenges!!
Melissa
Comment from Senyai
Hi SugarRay,
Your 2 line poem is excellent with a wonderful image of a dreamer inside her daydream! This form isn't easy but you have your internal rhyme and end rhyme placed well within your six syllable allotment per line. Quite a restrictive form that can kill creativity, but you excelled here! Very beautiful and well done. Out of sixes but you would get one here.
You'll do well in the contest :-)
Senyai
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Hi SugarRay,
Your 2 line poem is excellent with a wonderful image of a dreamer inside her daydream! This form isn't easy but you have your internal rhyme and end rhyme placed well within your six syllable allotment per line. Quite a restrictive form that can kill creativity, but you excelled here! Very beautiful and well done. Out of sixes but you would get one here.
You'll do well in the contest :-)
Senyai
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Hello Senyai. Thanks so much. Just the thought that you would give it a six delights me!! :)
Melissa
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:-)
Comment from Pantygynt
This contest entry is a lovely thought expressed beautifully over two lines and compliant with the doubled rhyming requirements as laid down. I like the juxtaposed words beside and inside.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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This contest entry is a lovely thought expressed beautifully over two lines and compliant with the doubled rhyming requirements as laid down. I like the juxtaposed words beside and inside.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Thanks dear Jim!! These short ones are quite a challenge! Glad you like it.
Melissa
Comment from judiverse
An adorable picture. i admire that you did double duty with your rhyme--beside and inside and streams and daydreams. It's tricky to achieve and your rhymes are in keeping with the mood of the poem. It is a rare occasion to find such a lovely place to engage in daydreams. Neat idea about living inside daydreams. This is wonderful for a two-liner and best of luck in the contest. judi
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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An adorable picture. i admire that you did double duty with your rhyme--beside and inside and streams and daydreams. It's tricky to achieve and your rhymes are in keeping with the mood of the poem. It is a rare occasion to find such a lovely place to engage in daydreams. Neat idea about living inside daydreams. This is wonderful for a two-liner and best of luck in the contest. judi
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Hello Judi. Thanks so very much. The internal rhyme and end rhymes are a requirement for this prompt and make it quite the challenge. It is fun to have to push and pull words to make it all happen. :)
Melissa
Comment from Brenda Henderson
Beautifully crafted. I found this light uplifting and ethereal much like a daydream. Your choice of color here is exquisite. The work in its entirety is quite beautiful to behold. Well done!
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Beautifully crafted. I found this light uplifting and ethereal much like a daydream. Your choice of color here is exquisite. The work in its entirety is quite beautiful to behold. Well done!
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Thank you so much Brenda.
Melissa
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You're Welcome!
Comment from mermaids
Love your two line poem and the feeling you create with your words. I like the line "I live inside daydreams", it gives me a good feeling and has a fantasy feel to it. Excellent two line poem.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Love your two line poem and the feeling you create with your words. I like the line "I live inside daydreams", it gives me a good feeling and has a fantasy feel to it. Excellent two line poem.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Hi Mermaids!! Thanks so much. I am delighted you liked it. It is so short that it is a challenge!!
Melissa
Comment from June Sargent
Just lovely! Your beautiful artwork and well chosen words create a perfect poem in just two lines. It's definitely a winner! Living in my own dreams...great imagery.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Just lovely! Your beautiful artwork and well chosen words create a perfect poem in just two lines. It's definitely a winner! Living in my own dreams...great imagery.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Hi June. Thank you so very much for your ? so encouraging? comments. Hugs, my friend.
Melissa
Comment from Sally Law
Delicious poem that just floats across the page. Perfectly metered and rhymed. A winner here, I swear it! Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest,
Sal XOs...
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reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Delicious poem that just floats across the page. Perfectly metered and rhymed. A winner here, I swear it! Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest,
Sal XOs...
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Hi Sweet Sal, I so appreciate you and your encouraging words. Hugs and many thanks!!
Melissa
Comment from royowen
I can remember being a dreamer when I was young, sitting down under a tree and dreaming of a life that was truly free of anxiety and "immediacy", I liked that little boy! Beautifully written my friend, well done Melissa, good luck, blessings Roy
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reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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I can remember being a dreamer when I was young, sitting down under a tree and dreaming of a life that was truly free of anxiety and "immediacy", I liked that little boy! Beautifully written my friend, well done Melissa, good luck, blessings Roy
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2021
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Thanks so much Roy!!
Melissa
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Good job,