Reviews from

This Time - That Time 3

Viewing comments for Chapter 45 "Veronica Threatens the Powers! "
Third book in the time travel trilogy

30 total reviews 
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Sandra,
Another marvelous chapter as the net begins to tighten around Charles.
Excellent insightful comment: "But if I know anything about the hierarchy in the navy, he will be quietly removed like an embarrassing stain."
The "good old boys" protect themselves.
You've wound the threads tightly in the ever shifting scenarios that envelope
all of the characters.
An interesting ultimatum uttered by Veronica. We'll see how the Powers respond. Time is a tricky thing.
Well done, my friend.
Looking forward to the next chapter!
Robert


 Comment Written 19-May-2019


reply by the author on 19-May-2019
    Thank you so much for the lovely review and the six stars, Robert. There is a problem with Mildred and Tommy, isn't there? Veronica and Gladys can only see heartache ahead for the two of them. Just two parts to go and a tidy up with an epilogue. I hope you like those parts. :)) Big hugs, my dear friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Ulla
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Sandra, this is just brilliant. They all got the better of that idiot, and now Victoria is furious with the powers to be. I couldn't agree more, Mildred deserves to experience the love from a man. I just wonder if they a agree, won't be to interfere with the history of what is Mildred. But, of course, it certainly won't have international implications. Big hugs. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 19-May-2019


reply by the author on 19-May-2019
    I think everyone will be surprised. :))
    Thank you so much, my friend, for those lovely stars and the wonderful review. I really have appreciated you all the way through. Nearly done now. Two parts to go and a short epilogue. Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from tfawcus
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

A good chapter, beginning to tie up a few loose ends after all the drama of the previous scene. Interesting foreshadowing of a possible resolution for Mildred and Tommy. I also like the way you leave the possibility hanging that Churchill might still be convinced by the Jutland strategy that has been outlined to him. A bit more for the time travellers to do yet, perhaps. Maybe Gladys can use that as a bargaining chip to get what she wants for Mildred. You have left some intriguing possibilities open.

 Comment Written 18-May-2019


reply by the author on 19-May-2019
    Thank you so much for the 6 stars, and fabulous review, Tony. There are only two parts left, and the ending will be quite different to what everyone is expecting. As this is the last book in the trilogy all the answers had to add up. There will be a short prologue as well. I'll miss this lot, they've been with me for over 4 years now. Thank you again, my friend. Sandra xx
Comment from Heather Knight
Excellent
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Another great chapter.

I like the expression 'dittoed my feelings'.

I don't remember if I told you last time, but bringing Churchill into the story was a great idea.

I do hope Mildred can have her happy ending.

 Comment Written 18-May-2019


reply by the author on 18-May-2019
    Thank you, Maria. I had this mental picture of Churchill, puffing on his cigar, polluting the room, and then his look of shock seeing the King's picture. I'm glad you liked it. Two parts left and a short prologue to tidy the loose ends. :)) Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from JDRBAR
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Stupendous! The reactions were all so clearly defined I felt like I was watching them in person.
How can Mildred stay? She's part of Veronica's life, not to mention Ann and Michael. Hmmmm! At any rate, I'm glad Veronica told off the powers. They deserved it.
I see you incorporated the name Daphne into this chapter. Does that mean Gladys won't become Daphne?
Great chapter.

 Comment Written 18-May-2019


reply by the author on 18-May-2019
    Yes, I took your advice when you said Daphne sounded soft, (I liked that, actually, because that was my mother's name. And she was a softy) so Gladys remains. :)) As for Mildred and Tommy. There are two more chapters, you'll find out a bit at the end of the next chapter, and then in the finale part, it will all fall into place. (hopefully!!)

    Thank you so very much for that fantastic compliment. I'm delighted you enjoyed this part, and also gave it a six. That was a review that put a big smile on my face. Thank you so, so much! Big hugs, my dear friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was an interesting chapter, Sandra. You packed a lot of info in it. I thought the glasses on WC was a great idea--even greater the Churchill saw them! I didn't think about Mildred wanting to stay, but it makes sense--sets up a great ending. I like the rant at the end. Food job and thanks for sharing, Jan

 Comment Written 18-May-2019


reply by the author on 18-May-2019
    Thank you so very much, Jan, for the lovely six stars and the wonderful review. Two chapters to go with an ending that will hopefully surprise and please everyone. Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Alex Rosel
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I haven't been following the previous posts, so I come to this cold.

Here are a couple of things you might like to consider.

I'm sure Winston Churchill - this doesn't sit quite right with me. Would someone refer to Winston by his full name when they've just called him Churchill a few seconds ago?

Getting dialogue tags right is usually difficult. One thing you might like to try is:
1 Copy and paste the text (do not work on the original);
2 Strip out all the speech;
3 Strip out anything that is pure narrative:
4 You're now left with the dialogue tags;
5 Along with indicating who's talking, do they add to the characterisation? Do they convey attitude? Or are they a series of mundane snippets?

All the best :)

 Comment Written 18-May-2019


reply by the author on 18-May-2019
    Thank you for coming and reading this part, Alex, and for your suggestions. I'll do that. It will be an interesting exercise. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from WryWriter
Excellent
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This was an excellent chapter to swing the reader's emotions from amusement, to sadness, to anger and then to anticipation with the superb ending. A couple of suggestions for your consideration below:
----------
"I'm so grateful to you, Veronica, and to you, Mildred, for all you've done. ....like a death sentence anyway to Charles."

Not sacked((omit, anyway)).

"It's all quite outlandish" (End punctuation)
----------------
Another great read by a most talented author! Enjoyed! : )

 Comment Written 17-May-2019


reply by the author on 18-May-2019
    Thank you so much for this lovely review, my friend, and finding that missing full.stop. I've also changed the sentence with, anyway, in it. Two parts left to go. :)) Big hugs my friend. Sandra xx
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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So it looks like this is the end for Charles, he may even be committed, I don't think people like him repent very easily, and he may do something incredibly stupid. Dear Veronica says to the powers that be, giving an ultimatum that Mildred remains in that time frame, so she can be as happy as she is. I didn't think she had a choice about time travel. It just happened , mind you, she could dig her heels in! Well done Sandra, an excellent episode, blessings, Roy

 Comment Written 17-May-2019


reply by the author on 17-May-2019
    It's not quite over yet, Roy. I think you will all have a surprise when I post the last chapter. Only two to go, and a small epilogue to tie up loose ends. Thank you so much for this lovely review, my dear friend. You are right about Charles not repenting, hmm, he's just not a nice man. No, Veronica has no say in her time-travelling, but she could make it difficult. Though, saying that, she wouldn't do anything that would hurt someone else. Thank you again, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
reply by royowen on 17-May-2019
    That's what the big heart of your characters would o dear Sandra, Roy
Comment from Lori S.
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I'm intrigued! I'm going back to the beginning! Lovely job with the dialogue and I got the idea even though it's the first I've read! Looking forward to reading more of your work!

 Comment Written 17-May-2019


reply by the author on 17-May-2019
    Aw, thank you so much, Lori. This book has two more chapters, and that will finish the three books. I hope you like the story if you are starting from the beginning, it has lots of twists and turns. Thank you for reading this part and the lovely review you gave it. :)) Sandra xxx

    Ps, I've just seen that you are new to the site, so wanted to say, Welcome! You'll love it here. So nice to meet you. :))
reply by Lori S. on 17-May-2019
    Thank you! This is my first day and I've already upset one person but I'm still excited to be here where I can get real feedback! I look forward to reading your work!