Haiku Club Challenges, Book II
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "haiku (sugar cotton clouds)"an anthology of haiku written by fanstory poets
28 total reviews
Comment from rama devi
Lovely tone and tenor. Superb word economy, superb imagery, superb phonetics (all the S sounds plus alliteration of C and M as well as consonance of L)!
I could not open this in classic view, which is strange, since it has no artwork posted with it.
Anyway, I enjoyed. A six, if I had one left.
******
Love
rd
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
Lovely tone and tenor. Superb word economy, superb imagery, superb phonetics (all the S sounds plus alliteration of C and M as well as consonance of L)!
I could not open this in classic view, which is strange, since it has no artwork posted with it.
Anyway, I enjoyed. A six, if I had one left.
******
Love
rd
Comment Written 06-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
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:-))
Comment from Joan E.
I am sorry to hear you are battling your demons. Thank you for taking the time to share this appealing 5-7-3 haiku. It is quite visual and your use of alliteration intensifies its impact. Take good care of yourself- Joan
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
I am sorry to hear you are battling your demons. Thank you for taking the time to share this appealing 5-7-3 haiku. It is quite visual and your use of alliteration intensifies its impact. Take good care of yourself- Joan
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
Comment from rspoet
Hello Gypsy,
This is a fine haiku for the book
Excellent imagery of the clouds and their movement
and a "moving" satori line
Good use of alliteration that read smoothly
Nicely done
RS
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
Hello Gypsy,
This is a fine haiku for the book
Excellent imagery of the clouds and their movement
and a "moving" satori line
Good use of alliteration that read smoothly
Nicely done
RS
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Good topic choice.
-Format is good.
-I like all the references to
things that are sweet,
especially in lines one and two.
-Satori is also effective.
-Thanks for sharing, Gypsy.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
-Good topic choice.
-Format is good.
-I like all the references to
things that are sweet,
especially in lines one and two.
-Satori is also effective.
-Thanks for sharing, Gypsy.
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
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You are quite welcome, Gypsy.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Hang in there, Teach. You have so much talent, especially where haiku poetry is concerned. That's worth something I should think.
Many people would love to be able to write such vividly expressed, wonderfully composed haiku the way you do.
Much like the sweet offering you've presented for us all here to read and review.
I too deal with depression.
You mustn't let it win.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
Hang in there, Teach. You have so much talent, especially where haiku poetry is concerned. That's worth something I should think.
Many people would love to be able to write such vividly expressed, wonderfully composed haiku the way you do.
Much like the sweet offering you've presented for us all here to read and review.
I too deal with depression.
You mustn't let it win.
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
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Anytime.
Comment from Ric Myworld
What a timely poem. Just last night as the evening was approaching, the sky was full of huge cottony clouds of pink and feathery blues. Clouds of cotton candy I said, and here I sit in a car and can't even reach it. Thanks for sharing another fine poem. :-)
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
What a timely poem. Just last night as the evening was approaching, the sky was full of huge cottony clouds of pink and feathery blues. Clouds of cotton candy I said, and here I sit in a car and can't even reach it. Thanks for sharing another fine poem. :-)
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Gypsy
About you haiku clouds to me has a lot of meaning.
I know they are temporary and they will move along with their own sweet pace
Take care
Gert
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
Hello Gypsy
About you haiku clouds to me has a lot of meaning.
I know they are temporary and they will move along with their own sweet pace
Take care
Gert
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
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You are welcome Gypsy
Gert
Comment from DR DIP
Gypsy why is it that the most wonderful writers suffer from depression or some sort of mental illness?
God works in mysterious ways. All poets and painters seem to suffer from some sort of emotional affliction I have found. We are masters of our own keyboard and the words can convey our feelings and emotions and mental state better than any doctor.
Keep well my Gypsy Rose..try not to feel 'blue'
dip
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
Gypsy why is it that the most wonderful writers suffer from depression or some sort of mental illness?
God works in mysterious ways. All poets and painters seem to suffer from some sort of emotional affliction I have found. We are masters of our own keyboard and the words can convey our feelings and emotions and mental state better than any doctor.
Keep well my Gypsy Rose..try not to feel 'blue'
dip
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
Comment from royowen
I like the sheer.ambiguous ."movement" of this work Gypsy, the satori line is clever, thoughtful, spiked with multiplistic meaning, one the best examples of subtlety in words one could see, well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
I like the sheer.ambiguous ."movement" of this work Gypsy, the satori line is clever, thoughtful, spiked with multiplistic meaning, one the best examples of subtlety in words one could see, well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
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Most welcome
Comment from dragonpoet
This gives me an image of a spring day that has puffy clouds in the sky and very little breeze to move them around. I thought it was called cotton candy not sugar candy. Both work.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
This gives me an image of a spring day that has puffy clouds in the sky and very little breeze to move them around. I thought it was called cotton candy not sugar candy. Both work.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 05-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
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thank you very much for your review and kind words
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Don't mention it.
Joan