Baseball Dreams
A really short one...20 total reviews
Comment from Jumbo J
Hey John((((((((... whilst you say you don't 'dangle' with poetry... the sway within your 25 words hung low with the form of what is know to be 'poetry'... and man... you capture so much with these 25 words.. It took me back to the Christmas when I received my first bat, signed baseball and mitt... the cousin's and I played until the day turned to night... and how many times did we have to search for that one very special ball... nothin' like hearing the 'crack' of that well timed swing that connects on the sweet spot... "where did that ball go?" Smile)))))))))... should'a entered this one in the contest Brother... I suspect it would have came up with a result!
With our thoughts we create,
the moments of joy,
James.
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2016
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Hey John((((((((... whilst you say you don't 'dangle' with poetry... the sway within your 25 words hung low with the form of what is know to be 'poetry'... and man... you capture so much with these 25 words.. It took me back to the Christmas when I received my first bat, signed baseball and mitt... the cousin's and I played until the day turned to night... and how many times did we have to search for that one very special ball... nothin' like hearing the 'crack' of that well timed swing that connects on the sweet spot... "where did that ball go?" Smile)))))))))... should'a entered this one in the contest Brother... I suspect it would have came up with a result!
With our thoughts we create,
the moments of joy,
James.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2016
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Thank you, James, for an astonishing review! I never would consider what I wrote as poetry. Maybe I know more then "me thinks me do"?
I love baseball. If only my aging shoulders didn't ache so damn much I'd still be able to throw a ball with my boys and grandkids.
Oh well, better then the alternative, right? Be well my brother. John
Comment from Nomar Chagrin
Well, that packed a lot of baseball into a few words. That's how I remember it when I was a kid. We'd play late until we couldn't see the ball anymore, then we'd play another hour.
The only thing is we called it bottom of the ninth instead of last.
Anyway, short and sweet and enjoyable story.
~ Jack
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Well, that packed a lot of baseball into a few words. That's how I remember it when I was a kid. We'd play late until we couldn't see the ball anymore, then we'd play another hour.
The only thing is we called it bottom of the ninth instead of last.
Anyway, short and sweet and enjoyable story.
~ Jack
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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You're right. Play till it was dark, then play some more. Good times! Thanks for reading. John
Comment from MelB
I like this post and can relate. Just got back from a baseball tournament today. It was a beautiful day and my son's team won the tournament.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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I like this post and can relate. Just got back from a baseball tournament today. It was a beautiful day and my son's team won the tournament.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Yes! I like to hear that. Give him my congrats! I love baseball. Thank you for reading and sharing. John
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Thanks John! Me too!
Comment from Janet Foor
This could have been a great entry to the 25 word poetry contest. "BaseballDreams" is a fun little poem. Well done.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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This could have been a great entry to the 25 word poetry contest. "BaseballDreams" is a fun little poem. Well done.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Thank tou Janet for stopping over to read. Also for the encouraging remarks. John
Comment from Mary Wakeford
Your poem did well to express an American summer, all that is left is Chevrolet and apple pie. Good job for content and storyline while keeping with the 25 word limitation. Well done.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Your poem did well to express an American summer, all that is left is Chevrolet and apple pie. Good job for content and storyline while keeping with the 25 word limitation. Well done.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Baseball-apple pie and Chevrolet. Thanks for reading. John
Comment from Mastery
I think this route is fine, John. Anybody say it had to be poetry? I've seen other entries in poem form for this contest and this one little charmer about Baseball outshines them all. Bravo! (ps. How come I don't hear from you anymore, my friend?) Bob
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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I think this route is fine, John. Anybody say it had to be poetry? I've seen other entries in poem form for this contest and this one little charmer about Baseball outshines them all. Bravo! (ps. How come I don't hear from you anymore, my friend?) Bob
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Thank you, Bob. Honestly, time constraints. I'm working 6days a week, over 65 hours. I'll try to be a better fan going forward.... John
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No problem, my friend. I onlympost about thee times per month as is. Bob
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
Honestly I would have put this in for the poetry contest as it carries more poetic devices than a lot of poetry that does get entered!
Great feel to this economical piece. Says it all.
Great stuff
GMG
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Hi there,
Honestly I would have put this in for the poetry contest as it carries more poetic devices than a lot of poetry that does get entered!
Great feel to this economical piece. Says it all.
Great stuff
GMG
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Thank you GMG. I know less about poetry then I do with writing. Thank you for the encouragement. It means a lot. John
Comment from Marykelly
The thing that makes most poetry different from prose, with some notable exceptions, is length. A poet can say briefly what a prose writer spends pages on. So for the poet word choice becomes essential and in your 25 words you have given a great description of backyard baseball and the coming of summer. You paint a picture and suggest the emotional welcome of summer.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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The thing that makes most poetry different from prose, with some notable exceptions, is length. A poet can say briefly what a prose writer spends pages on. So for the poet word choice becomes essential and in your 25 words you have given a great description of backyard baseball and the coming of summer. You paint a picture and suggest the emotional welcome of summer.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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Thank you Mary for the encouraging words. John
Comment from rspoet
You should have made a 25 word story contest
This would have done well
Touched on those Wiffle ball memories
Pitcher, batter, player, commentator all in one
with mosquitoes and crickets for spectators
You have it exactly as I remember it
Excellent picture to match
Well done
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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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You should have made a 25 word story contest
This would have done well
Touched on those Wiffle ball memories
Pitcher, batter, player, commentator all in one
with mosquitoes and crickets for spectators
You have it exactly as I remember it
Excellent picture to match
Well done
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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I loved playing wiggle ball, by myself just batting it or with friends. Thanks for reading and sharing. John
Comment from William Ross
No one said it had to rhyme, great 25 word on whiffle ball in the backyard mosquitoes and all. thanks for the share. enjoy the day
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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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No one said it had to rhyme, great 25 word on whiffle ball in the backyard mosquitoes and all. thanks for the share. enjoy the day
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2016
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William, thank you very much for the review and encouragement. John