Ten Elephants
Elephants march to their sunset.56 total reviews
Comment from waterartist707
This does justice to the tragedy the story is yelling. It's painfully heartbreaking that this is based on truth but it is and it couldn't have been written with more sincerity and passion. I loved this.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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This does justice to the tragedy the story is yelling. It's painfully heartbreaking that this is based on truth but it is and it couldn't have been written with more sincerity and passion. I loved this.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you, waterartist707, for your thoughtful and passionate review. When I embarked upon my poem, I thought poachers only shot elephants. I Google elephant poaching and was horrified that they also use poisoned spears and watermelons, military aircraft and anti-tank mines, pits and wire snarls. This truth propelled me further to write my poem. I read in the paper this morning that the 2014 rate of elephant poaching remained unchanged from 2013 as poachers rapidly hunt wild elephants to extinction. Thank you for your review.
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you are so welcome. keep writing!
Comment from skye
Pitiful life for this herd. It is so true, that we as a world, are earnestly trying to obliterate wildlife, for what... a bit of ivory, a piece of meat, oil, diamonds, etc.
Your poem is well thought, well written, and sad.
Excellent.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Pitiful life for this herd. It is so true, that we as a world, are earnestly trying to obliterate wildlife, for what... a bit of ivory, a piece of meat, oil, diamonds, etc.
Your poem is well thought, well written, and sad.
Excellent.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you, skye, for your kind review. I am dizzy with the scale and the horrific weapons poachers use to murder these majestic animals. I am humbled that my poem moved you.
Comment from Cedar
This is such a sad poem, but your words are so true. It happens everyday, the senseless slaughter of these giants just for the greenback dollar. I think it would be a wonderful way to ease children into what death is really all about. Great job and good luck. Bill
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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This is such a sad poem, but your words are so true. It happens everyday, the senseless slaughter of these giants just for the greenback dollar. I think it would be a wonderful way to ease children into what death is really all about. Great job and good luck. Bill
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you, Bill, for your kind review. My poem is a conversation starter. I am glad you acknowledged that my poem "would be a wonderful way to ease children into what death is really all about." Thanks.
Comment from acerisestory
Your poem is a powerful one, mystery poet, and in need of being written. So, thank you! Thank you, also, for your author's notes. I had no idea the population of the wild elephant has dwindled at such an alarming rate. Our children should understand now what is happening so they can set their sites on finding a solution before it's too late.
Your poem is well written, your couplets rhyme well, and your well chosen words flow with a fine rhythm.
This is a great entry for the contest. Best of luck! Alana
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Your poem is a powerful one, mystery poet, and in need of being written. So, thank you! Thank you, also, for your author's notes. I had no idea the population of the wild elephant has dwindled at such an alarming rate. Our children should understand now what is happening so they can set their sites on finding a solution before it's too late.
Your poem is well written, your couplets rhyme well, and your well chosen words flow with a fine rhythm.
This is a great entry for the contest. Best of luck! Alana
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you, Alana, for your kind, thoughtful review. Until I researched elephant poaching for my poem, I had no idea that poachers have killed 95% of the world's elephant population in the last hundred years. Experts predict they may become extinct in ten to twenty years. I read in the paper this morning that the 2014 rate of elephant poaching remained unchanged from 2013. Yes, our children should understand what is happening now. Thanks for your review.
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You are welcome!
Comment from robina1978
The photo is gorgeous and complements your poem very well. I first even though it was Brooke writing this as I reviewed it. This is a sad but original subject for this children's poem. We saw things like this on animal planet. Best wishes for the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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The photo is gorgeous and complements your poem very well. I first even though it was Brooke writing this as I reviewed it. This is a sad but original subject for this children's poem. We saw things like this on animal planet. Best wishes for the contest.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you for your review and contest well wishes. Brooke's count down poem "Ten Elephants" saddened me because it omitted the real countdown of elephants being poached to extinction. I decided to write my version of "Ten Elephants" listing the many documented ways poachers kill them. Thanks for your review.
Comment from livelylinda
Author: such sadness in your message. Elephants are such regal creatures. I've seen video and pictures in which a baby get stuck and yells for its mom. Two to three elephants immediately come running and quickly get the baby out of its troubled position. Then the elephants form a tight circle around the baby for protection and examination. They mourn their dead and family is of the upmost importance. I know a few humans who need to take a lesson from the elephant. Your poem will teach children about the horrors the elephant must endure. Maybe those children will change the course of history for the elephants. livelylinda
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Author: such sadness in your message. Elephants are such regal creatures. I've seen video and pictures in which a baby get stuck and yells for its mom. Two to three elephants immediately come running and quickly get the baby out of its troubled position. Then the elephants form a tight circle around the baby for protection and examination. They mourn their dead and family is of the upmost importance. I know a few humans who need to take a lesson from the elephant. Your poem will teach children about the horrors the elephant must endure. Maybe those children will change the course of history for the elephants. livelylinda
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you, livelylinda, for your kind and touching review. We all need to take a lesson from elephants and what poachers are doing to them.
Comment from patcelaw
There is just now sense in killing these animals for sport as some call it. It is just a thing to brag about and have a trophy on the wall of some game hunter museum as one I visited some time ago. Nicely written with an important message
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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There is just now sense in killing these animals for sport as some call it. It is just a thing to brag about and have a trophy on the wall of some game hunter museum as one I visited some time ago. Nicely written with an important message
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you for your kind review. I read in the paper today that the 2014 rate of elephant poaching is unchanged from 2013. In our lifetime, elephants can disappear from the wild.
Comment from Kingsland
It's terrible that poachers are killing these magnificent animals. Rinos are in the same awl full killing fields as well. Your poem is well written and flows well in its thought patterns. Let us hope that they are not all killed, because the world will never be the same again. It is a damn shame that this is happening... John
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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It's terrible that poachers are killing these magnificent animals. Rinos are in the same awl full killing fields as well. Your poem is well written and flows well in its thought patterns. Let us hope that they are not all killed, because the world will never be the same again. It is a damn shame that this is happening... John
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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This is all horrible. In order to write my countdown poem, I researched online the poachers' killing methods. The pictures are gruesome. Anti-tank mines!? I am nauseous by the scale and rapidity of their extinction. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Njorgensen
Excellent alternative to Brooke's Ten Elephants poem. Yours was a more sober, factual account of the atrocities that plague the elephant world. It was a unique expression of a counting poem, where most of them are lighthearted.
Terrific!
Nancy
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Excellent alternative to Brooke's Ten Elephants poem. Yours was a more sober, factual account of the atrocities that plague the elephant world. It was a unique expression of a counting poem, where most of them are lighthearted.
Terrific!
Nancy
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Yes, Nancy, mine was the anti-lighthearted countdown poem. In order to write my poem, I researched online the poachers' killing methods. The pictures are gruesome. Anti-tank mines!? I am nauseous by the scale and rapidity of their extinction. The horrible thing about my poem is that it is all true and happening every day. Thanks for your review.
Comment from bob cullen
A poem that contains a very important message. Poachers must be stopped. And they must be stopped before its too late.
As poetry it is faultless. As a message of conservation It must be listened too
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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A poem that contains a very important message. Poachers must be stopped. And they must be stopped before its too late.
As poetry it is faultless. As a message of conservation It must be listened too
Comment Written 24-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2015
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Thank you, Bob, for your kind review. I read in the paper this morning that the 2014 rate of elephant poaching remained unchanged from 2013 as the carnage and massacres continue unabated. I have a bad feeling about the direction we are going.