Stick Change
Horror with cheesy introduction - PLEASE SEE NOTES26 total reviews
Comment from Hareem.S
I like how the story begins with good interesting dialogue. It is penned down in a vivid manner and the dialogues capture the reader's interest till the end.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014
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I like how the story begins with good interesting dialogue. It is penned down in a vivid manner and the dialogues capture the reader's interest till the end.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014
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Thank you for the great review!
Comment from Dean Kuch
Ha ha! I love the MC horror hosts name, Death D. Fying, or DD, for short. That was g-r-r-r-e-a-t! And Terry's dearly departed brother, no less. His witty quips and campy puns were a lot of fun to read. Brought back a few memories of those good ole days of television, when many late night Creature Features, with their campy horror hosts in silly get-ups, permeated the airwaves on Saturday nights. Spider in the pillows, Huh? Groovy. I happen to like spiders a lot...
Drivers...start your engines! Our story kicks off as our protagonist, Nigs, a race car driver, prepares to start his race. Unfortunately at some point during the race, he crashes the car and is done for the day. When he goes to congratulate the winner, he's greeted with a less than polite response. So be it, thinks Nigs, and walks away.
Jimmy Buffet, the track's owner, turns Nigs on to an establishment that specialize in a magical, colorful, but very uncomfortable, car seat cover that provides a less than comfortable ride, but is promised to ensure victory in races when used. So of course, our hero purchases one and has Ross install it in his car.
During the first race when using the seat cover, Nigs avoids disaster on lap one due to another opponent cutting in front of his car and stopping a flying bumper from a previous wreck that sent it hurling through the air. Lucky break, or magical seat cover? Whichever it was, Nig's elation was short-lived as something within the seat cover began to invade his body in ays no man's body was intended to be violated, if you catch the pitch I throwin' out here.
Nearly overcome by the shock and immense pain, Nig's begins to hear a voice -- an inner voice -- that begins to speak to him. It asks him his position in the race, and when Nigs manages to choke out a garbled "fifth", the voice pushes him to go faster, try harder.
Eventually after passing all of his competitors in the race, including his arch rival, #6, Nig's hears his fated foe slam headlong into the car that nearly cost him the race in the beginning. The detached bumper that had impaled the side of the now abandoned car went through number six's car, and into his head, pinning him against his window. Dead as a door nail, as they say.
And so it goes, with the help of the anal probing seat cover, Nigs and his car win race after race in the banger race circuit, garnering lots of attention from nubile young female fans along the way, as well as money and fame.
Buffet does try to warn our hero, whose name may or may not be Nigs, but that's what I'm calling him in my review for identifications sake. However, he doesn't listen of course, and blows Buffet off faster than an ant in a hurricane.
During Nig's last (and ultimately his final) race, he feel things begin to change. No longer in control as the probe from the seat cover had permitted before, he soon began to be closely tailed by another competitor with the same obvious fervor for winning as he'd had at all costs. His opponent slams into the rear of his car, sending him spiraling and out of control. Nig's ends up smashing head long into a car he'd spun out previously in the race himself.
As it turns out, Nigs is severely injured in the crash and placed in a medically induced coma while he slowly suffers and dies. The youngster Nigs was rude to -- the one who wanted his secret in an earlier race that Nigs had won, also paid ole Jimmy a visit, just as Nigs had. Jimmy gave him the card, just like as he had Nigs. He also got himself a seat cover from the emporium Nigs had visited. It seems the seat cover not only provides winning races, it also infuses the very soul of the one possessing it with hate and anger, as I had suspected and mentioned earlier on in my review.
As the story concludes, Nigs fades slowly to black, quickly dying. And the last thing he hears in his short, miserable life is Jimmy's final words to him...
""Yep. We all got deals to make."
Great story, Author 'X'. A little racy, but what twisted terror tale with a racing theme isn't? I think you've done Dr. Terry Fying very proud here, and I'm sure he appreciates the effort and time that went into the writing of it. After all, we both know what happens to those who don't put forth real, honest effort in the dear doc's contests, don't we? They lose, heh-heh-heh... What did you think I was going to say, h-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m?
Nicely done!
~FINIS~
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014
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Ha ha! I love the MC horror hosts name, Death D. Fying, or DD, for short. That was g-r-r-r-e-a-t! And Terry's dearly departed brother, no less. His witty quips and campy puns were a lot of fun to read. Brought back a few memories of those good ole days of television, when many late night Creature Features, with their campy horror hosts in silly get-ups, permeated the airwaves on Saturday nights. Spider in the pillows, Huh? Groovy. I happen to like spiders a lot...
Drivers...start your engines! Our story kicks off as our protagonist, Nigs, a race car driver, prepares to start his race. Unfortunately at some point during the race, he crashes the car and is done for the day. When he goes to congratulate the winner, he's greeted with a less than polite response. So be it, thinks Nigs, and walks away.
Jimmy Buffet, the track's owner, turns Nigs on to an establishment that specialize in a magical, colorful, but very uncomfortable, car seat cover that provides a less than comfortable ride, but is promised to ensure victory in races when used. So of course, our hero purchases one and has Ross install it in his car.
During the first race when using the seat cover, Nigs avoids disaster on lap one due to another opponent cutting in front of his car and stopping a flying bumper from a previous wreck that sent it hurling through the air. Lucky break, or magical seat cover? Whichever it was, Nig's elation was short-lived as something within the seat cover began to invade his body in ays no man's body was intended to be violated, if you catch the pitch I throwin' out here.
Nearly overcome by the shock and immense pain, Nig's begins to hear a voice -- an inner voice -- that begins to speak to him. It asks him his position in the race, and when Nigs manages to choke out a garbled "fifth", the voice pushes him to go faster, try harder.
Eventually after passing all of his competitors in the race, including his arch rival, #6, Nig's hears his fated foe slam headlong into the car that nearly cost him the race in the beginning. The detached bumper that had impaled the side of the now abandoned car went through number six's car, and into his head, pinning him against his window. Dead as a door nail, as they say.
And so it goes, with the help of the anal probing seat cover, Nigs and his car win race after race in the banger race circuit, garnering lots of attention from nubile young female fans along the way, as well as money and fame.
Buffet does try to warn our hero, whose name may or may not be Nigs, but that's what I'm calling him in my review for identifications sake. However, he doesn't listen of course, and blows Buffet off faster than an ant in a hurricane.
During Nig's last (and ultimately his final) race, he feel things begin to change. No longer in control as the probe from the seat cover had permitted before, he soon began to be closely tailed by another competitor with the same obvious fervor for winning as he'd had at all costs. His opponent slams into the rear of his car, sending him spiraling and out of control. Nig's ends up smashing head long into a car he'd spun out previously in the race himself.
As it turns out, Nigs is severely injured in the crash and placed in a medically induced coma while he slowly suffers and dies. The youngster Nigs was rude to -- the one who wanted his secret in an earlier race that Nigs had won, also paid ole Jimmy a visit, just as Nigs had. Jimmy gave him the card, just like as he had Nigs. He also got himself a seat cover from the emporium Nigs had visited. It seems the seat cover not only provides winning races, it also infuses the very soul of the one possessing it with hate and anger, as I had suspected and mentioned earlier on in my review.
As the story concludes, Nigs fades slowly to black, quickly dying. And the last thing he hears in his short, miserable life is Jimmy's final words to him...
""Yep. We all got deals to make."
Great story, Author 'X'. A little racy, but what twisted terror tale with a racing theme isn't? I think you've done Dr. Terry Fying very proud here, and I'm sure he appreciates the effort and time that went into the writing of it. After all, we both know what happens to those who don't put forth real, honest effort in the dear doc's contests, don't we? They lose, heh-heh-heh... What did you think I was going to say, h-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m?
Nicely done!
Comment Written 14-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014
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Wow! Thanks, Dean :-). I think your review is almost as long as my story. Thanks for the great contest idea - it really got my imagination moving. So glad you enjoyed my entry (no pun intended ;-)).
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Hey, no sweat, Mike, it was great! I really appreciate the fantastic effort that everyone put into their entries. And a great story like yours deserves nothing less than the best review I can muster. I just wish I'd had a sixer left to lay on you! :}
Great work!
Comment from OLA THOMAS
A very long post but not boring with you twists here ant there and stunning dialogue lines, these tend a reader on the page till the end. Nice details and a well managed storyline.
ola thomas
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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A very long post but not boring with you twists here ant there and stunning dialogue lines, these tend a reader on the page till the end. Nice details and a well managed storyline.
ola thomas
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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Thank you, Ola :-). I'm really glad you enjoyed the read.
Comment from Max Edon
I loved this story. How creative--a demonic car seat cover! There was a lot of humor in this too. But what the heck is a Nigs--a black person?
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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I loved this story. How creative--a demonic car seat cover! There was a lot of humor in this too. But what the heck is a Nigs--a black person?
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Thanks so much, Max :-). Yeah, Nigs was a way to use the word without quite going that far, because I wanted to keep the humour in there. I'm thrilled you enjoyed my devilish tale!
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You are welcome
Comment from Raphael Montonaro
Nascar forever.....er mum, make that this story forever! Nice dialogue with lots of narrative to back it up. Great job keep it going.....varooooom!!, I'm gone!
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Nascar forever.....er mum, make that this story forever! Nice dialogue with lots of narrative to back it up. Great job keep it going.....varooooom!!, I'm gone!
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Hehe, thanks Raphael. Really glad you liked it :-).
Comment from ravenblack
So that is why David Hasselhoff was so eager to make the switch from Knightrider to Baywatch- ouch. Awesome write , laced with high octane. I know you don't moonlight as a Nascar driver which made your racing scenes incredible- you really caught the feel of the race- except for that intrusive stick.
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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So that is why David Hasselhoff was so eager to make the switch from Knightrider to Baywatch- ouch. Awesome write , laced with high octane. I know you don't moonlight as a Nascar driver which made your racing scenes incredible- you really caught the feel of the race- except for that intrusive stick.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Haha, now that would have added some dimension to Knight Rider! Of course, it might also help explain why The Hoff went a bit off the rails - that's be some serious past trauma! I'll let you in on a secret - I can't even drive. I do love immersing myself in the thought of how something must feel, though. So glad you enjoyed the story :-).
Comment from michaelcahill
Hahaha. Christ, what the hell did I enter this for!!! This is just as entertaining as hell. I loved it. Length? Who cares. I read Lord Of the Rings in three days. Good is good. Specifically, everything that makes something good is here. Awesome. Just a note. You should find a way to cover your name in the graphic. The committee Nazi's might notice as it's supposed to be anon. mikey
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Hahaha. Christ, what the hell did I enter this for!!! This is just as entertaining as hell. I loved it. Length? Who cares. I read Lord Of the Rings in three days. Good is good. Specifically, everything that makes something good is here. Awesome. Just a note. You should find a way to cover your name in the graphic. The committee Nazi's might notice as it's supposed to be anon. mikey
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Thanks Mikey :-). Crap - I hadn't realised the pic showed my Flickr account name when it's hovered on. I'll have to find another way of dropping it in (the quality if I let Fanstory do it is pants! I had a ball writing this one.
Comment from adewpearl
Your narrator is one mean person. I would be scared to go to bed ever again after that passage about the spiders waiting in the pillow. LOL
It was a sparse crowd tonight, but that
a dribble of blood leaking from an eye and a lolling tongue - those are really icky visuals LOL
waterfall on my windscreen, and I felt - add the comma
If you were setting out to give me the creeps, you've succeeded. LOL :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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Your narrator is one mean person. I would be scared to go to bed ever again after that passage about the spiders waiting in the pillow. LOL
It was a sparse crowd tonight, but that
a dribble of blood leaking from an eye and a lolling tongue - those are really icky visuals LOL
waterfall on my windscreen, and I felt - add the comma
If you were setting out to give me the creeps, you've succeeded. LOL :-) Brooke
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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Hehe, thanks Brooke. The spiders were a result of me thinking about what would've made me scared to go to bed when I was little (and, indeed, now!). Thanks for the comma catches. I had this idea a while back and wrote the first paragraph but lost enthusiasm. Then Dean's contest popped up and I knew it was the story trying to regrab my attention!
Comment from Michaelk
Great story. I was so engrossed in it that I literally jumped when someone came in the room. Your characters were great and very believable. The action was well done. The atmosphere was perfect for this story. This was like 'Days of thunder' meets 'Tales from the crypt'. Excellent pacing and descriptions as well. I'd say you're on pace for a first place finish.
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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Great story. I was so engrossed in it that I literally jumped when someone came in the room. Your characters were great and very believable. The action was well done. The atmosphere was perfect for this story. This was like 'Days of thunder' meets 'Tales from the crypt'. Excellent pacing and descriptions as well. I'd say you're on pace for a first place finish.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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Thanks so much, Michael :-). I'm so glad you got into it - there's no more flattering feedback than to say my story engrossed you.
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read. The profanity was a turn off for me, but it was part of the story. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read. The profanity was a turn off for me, but it was part of the story. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2014
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Thanks very much, Charlie. I never try to offend (although I'm happy to shock!), so I'm glad you saw the language was contextual. I'm really happy you liked it :-).
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You're welcome.