Little Billy
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 " Im Waiting......."memiors from my life experiences.
59 total reviews
Comment from edgey54
Well written and thought out. The flow and words went together.You emphasized the meaning. The way I looked at it there was no mistakes. Well done. Kenny
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
Well written and thought out. The flow and words went together.You emphasized the meaning. The way I looked at it there was no mistakes. Well done. Kenny
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
thank you
Comment from dportwood
keimosobie,
That you accepted the challenge of writing a villanelle is admirable. The repetition of rhyming scheme makes it a less-than-easy type of poetry to write. Very well done.
Duane
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
keimosobie,
That you accepted the challenge of writing a villanelle is admirable. The repetition of rhyming scheme makes it a less-than-easy type of poetry to write. Very well done.
Duane
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
thank you
Comment from katz meow
This well structured Villanelle presents itself in a dark manner. It also delivers a poignant message. Thanks for sharing this enjoyable read, that's also an excellent write...katz meow
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
This well structured Villanelle presents itself in a dark manner. It also delivers a poignant message. Thanks for sharing this enjoyable read, that's also an excellent write...katz meow
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
thank you katz
Comment from afternoonlight
I like everything about this writing. The rhyme, the repeating, the alternating lines, the subject handled poetically, dramatically. Awesome write.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
I like everything about this writing. The rhyme, the repeating, the alternating lines, the subject handled poetically, dramatically. Awesome write.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
thank you
Comment from Amina Ahmed
a very nice poem . i like the end:
All of your kings that are so royal.
Will beg for mercy under my scythe.
Stir the pot it's going to boil
What will you do when the earth's out of oil?
keep it up
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
a very nice poem . i like the end:
All of your kings that are so royal.
Will beg for mercy under my scythe.
Stir the pot it's going to boil
What will you do when the earth's out of oil?
keep it up
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
thanks.
Comment from Fireshadow
Billy, this is a perfectly structured villanelle poem with great imagery to present a rather dark theme. Perfect artwork presentation. I don't understand how the title relates to the actual poem, though. Could you please explain ? Very well penned writing, my friend. Amarillys
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
Billy, this is a perfectly structured villanelle poem with great imagery to present a rather dark theme. Perfect artwork presentation. I don't understand how the title relates to the actual poem, though. Could you please explain ? Very well penned writing, my friend. Amarillys
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
The grim reaper is waiting for the oil to run out. Supposed to be him telling the poem. Thank you for the review.
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi keimosobie
Interesting theme and an interesting form for this. It conveys your message very well. Good rhythm and a good flow to the words.
Patrick
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
Hi keimosobie
Interesting theme and an interesting form for this. It conveys your message very well. Good rhythm and a good flow to the words.
Patrick
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
Thank you
Comment from LadyCosgrove
An excellent example of villanelle that depicts a very poignant and current subject.
Well written and well delivered. :o)
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
An excellent example of villanelle that depicts a very poignant and current subject.
Well written and well delivered. :o)
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
Thanks
Comment from DecrepitOldBag
Excellent villanelle. I really like the two refrains 'stir the pot it's going to boil' and 'what will you do when the earth's out of oil'. Great writing, superb rhythm too. No faults to pick at a nice write with vivid imagery.
Warm wishes
Kat
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
Excellent villanelle. I really like the two refrains 'stir the pot it's going to boil' and 'what will you do when the earth's out of oil'. Great writing, superb rhythm too. No faults to pick at a nice write with vivid imagery.
Warm wishes
Kat
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
thank you
Comment from R. K. Alan
Loved the deep dark story line. Unfortunately, I think we all know the answer to your question. Well crafted and well presented. Loved the image. Ray aka Krlyon
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
Loved the deep dark story line. Unfortunately, I think we all know the answer to your question. Well crafted and well presented. Loved the image. Ray aka Krlyon
Comment Written 09-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2010
-
thank you