Bottom of the Loch
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Bonnie can't sit on Beach anymore"Parents die, so she moves in with unknown family
11 total reviews
Comment from dportwood
wierdgrace,
Goodness!
I hope the dark or fog does not prevent Hank from seeing the flag.
I did notice this:
As she sat, she stared wistfully out over the water.
This sentence is a repeat of the preceding one.
Duane
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reply by the author on 21-Jun-2010
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wierdgrace,
Goodness!
I hope the dark or fog does not prevent Hank from seeing the flag.
I did notice this:
As she sat, she stared wistfully out over the water.
This sentence is a repeat of the preceding one.
Duane
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2010
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thank you for catching, I will put this in my second draft, your the best.
