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CSP: A Collection of Poems

Viewing comments for Chapter 112 "Nine/One/One"
A collection of poetry

23 total reviews 
Comment from Just2Write
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I thought this senryu was very clever. The graphics helped too, but were not necessary to envision what would happen if you stick a fork into the toaster. Consider changing the word knife to fork to match the graphic.

 Comment Written 06-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    Just2Write, I just changed it to fork! And thanks for that. When writing it, I kept going back and forth between using knife or fork. I liked knife because of the two "K's" (kitchen - knife next to each other) and didn't even pay attention to the "K" at the end of fork! Ha! So thanks for that. I like it much better. :-)) Sue
Comment from sara-beth
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That is funny, and you know what......I might be one of those people that would do such a thing! Once, I got paint on my husband's cordless phone, and I was so worried that he would be mad that I ran it under the kitchen tap while scrubbing off the paint......you can imagine what happened! Duh! That was a long time ago, though, hmmm I also reached in front of the steaming tea kettle and burned the skin off my finger, so I guess I'll never learn to be careful......good luck to you in the contest!

 Comment Written 06-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    sara-beth, you are a very dangerous person! LOL!! Thanks for sharing those anecdotes of pain! And thank you for your very generous review. :-)) Sue
Comment from Susan E. Pennycuff
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I don't know hun, but at my house ... we call them thar thingamajiggys... forks lol

I can't tell you how many times I have done this and i know it is dangerous... I guess one day I will learn the hard way.

good luck in the contest dear.

Suzi

 Comment Written 06-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    Finally!! Someone admits it! But, now in you're in for a lecture - Ha! Do yourself a favor and keep a wooden spoon handy- LOL!! Thanks for your very kind review and. ...ahem...fun story. :-)) Sue.
Comment from babylonia
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LOL yeah, but it is so tempting. maybe if you use a fork instead .... nah! same result. made me smile. made me laugh. keep up the good work~
good luck~
love,
barbara

 Comment Written 06-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    Barbara, yeah a fork would work just great! As long as you want a 110 volt high! HA!! I swear I still see people do this occasionally and it makes me insane! What are they thinking?? Gotta laugh at some of the crazy things we do, though - ha! Cheers, Sue
reply by babylonia on 06-Jan-2009
    sue,
    yeah, they still do it. it is crazy. the problem is they aren't thinking OR they think it could never happen to me. when i was young i used to read stories all the time in the paper about someon doing something like that or doing the dishes during a lightening storm. touching too much metal at once and acting as an electric conductor. poof ... no brains.
    i think houses are better insulated now but back then ... oh well. some just never learn.
    love,
    barbara
Comment from NadineM
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Oops! Not a good idea! Dangerously funny is this write and contest entry. Good luck in the contest. Thanks for sharing this with me.

 Comment Written 05-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    Nadine, SHOCKING story, huh? Ha! Thanks for your very kind review and fun comments. :-)) Sue
Comment from Hitcher
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I bet it's happened to you! Come on Sue, come clean friend, this little piece of humor is a lost memory that just resurfaced? Ha ha. I think it is a great bit of humor for the contest, NO! It has never happened to me, Never! Ha ha.

 Comment Written 05-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    When I was a child, I DID do it and my mother freaked! But, still cannot believe that people still do it till this day. I've seen it!! And, yes, I yell at them! HA! Thanks for your vote of confidence that it's a "contender" .....Suc
Comment from AlvinTEthington
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I must be really dense. I don't get the humor in this. Why would an ambulance arrive for using a kitchen knife to get bread out of the toaster? If the person hurt himself or herself, that needs to be made clear. I also don't get the connection between the title and the poem. If you can explain the humor in this to me, or who your intended reader or target audience is, I would be happy to take another look. But, right now, I, at least, just don't "get it."

SECOND REVIEW:

The author explained to me this was about electrocution. Although I do not find that amusing, the first rating was unfair, and I have raised it accordingly.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 05-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 05-Jan-2009
    Okay, I have to be honest here and say, "You are joking, right????" It is quite known that many, many people have been seriously injured or even killed by using a metal object (usually a knife or fork) to dig out a stuck piece of bread in a toaster. "ELECTROCUTED". The connection between the title and the poem is when you get injured, people call 911 for an ambulance. I cannot even believe I'm spelling this out for you. Sorry you didn't get it. Sue
reply by AlvinTEthington on 05-Jan-2009
    I have never had that experience, nor have I know anyone who has. I will raise the rating now that you have explained it, but please review the rules for responding to reviews; this was inappropriate.
Comment from aviddbrut
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shocking little haiku here, sixteezkid! electrifying reading experience. quite arresting actually. good contest entry...good luck in the contest.
david

 Comment Written 05-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    Love this "hair-raising" review! HA! Thank you very much :-)) Sue
Comment from adewpearl
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I laughed out loud at that one - I wondered what the final line would be after I read the concrete image and thought uh oh. LOL Ambulance comes - of course!!! this is in good form and utterly hilarious in a gallows humor kinda way.

 Comment Written 05-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 05-Jan-2009
    So glad you laughed out loud!! Ha! That makes it all worth while. I was eating toast and wondering what to write about in the contest. And voila! Thanks for your great review, Brooke. :-)) Sue
reply by adewpearl on 05-Jan-2009
    What would make writing and life worthwhile today? I know, making Brooke laugh out loud. :-D
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2009
    Ha! Yes, yes..I admit, it was all for you, Brooke LOL!!
Comment from venusanblue
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Haha, I really enjoyed this poem. It told a whole story with a whole lot of funny visuals. So you were toast too,haha. Nice, V,xxx

 Comment Written 05-Jan-2009


reply by the author on 05-Jan-2009
    That's a good one...."you were toast"!! HA! Thanks very much for your most kind review. Regards, Sue