Footsteps
Silly story about being followed21 total reviews
Comment from karenina
Another way to deal with Angel's loss. Writing is always good therapy and your muse knows it! Grammarly was nagging me that "the moon shined bright" should be "the moon shone brightly" but hey, I just have the basic and I think if I want REAL answers I'd have to buy the pay version.
(smile)
"The footsteps behind me and I almost peed myself." Doesn't seem to be a complete sentence on its own. "There were footsteps behind me and..." maybe?
I felt the tension and fright here. I do not know how to use a gun, nor would I likely ever have one-- but I'd be inclined to shout behind me just to scare the "intruder" off!
Karenina
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
Another way to deal with Angel's loss. Writing is always good therapy and your muse knows it! Grammarly was nagging me that "the moon shined bright" should be "the moon shone brightly" but hey, I just have the basic and I think if I want REAL answers I'd have to buy the pay version.
(smile)
"The footsteps behind me and I almost peed myself." Doesn't seem to be a complete sentence on its own. "There were footsteps behind me and..." maybe?
I felt the tension and fright here. I do not know how to use a gun, nor would I likely ever have one-- but I'd be inclined to shout behind me just to scare the "intruder" off!
Karenina
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Karenina,
You are one of my mentors and I appreciate your input. I went ahead and made the changes you suggested. I appreciate you. Thank you for the wonderful review.
Cecilia
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Grammarly drives me nutty sometimes. I think both are correct actually, but maybe this way fits better? We'll see in your ensuing reviews!
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You're the best my friend
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I thought it was going to turn out that this was a dream. It was certainly an unnerving experience in your imagination that build in tension and anticipation until the relief of getting inside the house and discovering that there was nothing there. Fear will always be in our DNA. It's part of our survival kit from birth. And, in my view, it shouldn't always be considered a negative emotion because, without it, we wouldn't develop our courage and self-confidence to overcome it. Thanks for sharing your engaging story, Cecilia. Warm wishes Debbie
The moon (shone) bright.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
I thought it was going to turn out that this was a dream. It was certainly an unnerving experience in your imagination that build in tension and anticipation until the relief of getting inside the house and discovering that there was nothing there. Fear will always be in our DNA. It's part of our survival kit from birth. And, in my view, it shouldn't always be considered a negative emotion because, without it, we wouldn't develop our courage and self-confidence to overcome it. Thanks for sharing your engaging story, Cecilia. Warm wishes Debbie
The moon (shone) bright.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Debbie,
Thank you for a lovely review. Fear is a good thing like you say. It keeps us on our toes.
Cecilia
Comment from Brenda Strauser
Hi Cecilia, nice story. Good imagination. It is scary if you are being followed. Today, it is dangerous, especially if you are a woman. Well written. Have a Happy New Year.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
Hi Cecilia, nice story. Good imagination. It is scary if you are being followed. Today, it is dangerous, especially if you are a woman. Well written. Have a Happy New Year.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Brenda,
Thank you for the wonderful review. Have a Happy New Year yourself.
Cecilia
Comment from barbara.wilkey
When I was working I walked our little black labrador, Phoenix about 5:00 AM. It was still dark, one day a man stopped his car and attempted to talk to me. Although Phoenix was about 50 pounds, she was the friendliest dog in the world. I told my husband about it during dinner. It was the end of my walking the dog when it was dark. Thank you for sharing this story with us.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
When I was working I walked our little black labrador, Phoenix about 5:00 AM. It was still dark, one day a man stopped his car and attempted to talk to me. Although Phoenix was about 50 pounds, she was the friendliest dog in the world. I told my husband about it during dinner. It was the end of my walking the dog when it was dark. Thank you for sharing this story with us.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Barbara,
Thank you for the wonderful review. Walking at night can be sketchy.
Cecilia
Comment from Charles D Ezell
Well, we got home safely. I would never stop walking the dog because of footsteps. So it could be imagine , but no matter, kept walking and you will overcome. Angel in more ways than one. Good write
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
Well, we got home safely. I would never stop walking the dog because of footsteps. So it could be imagine , but no matter, kept walking and you will overcome. Angel in more ways than one. Good write
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Charles,
Thank you so much for the wonderful review. We kept walking. I was packing so we were okay.
Cecilia
Comment from tempeste
Ciao!,
At night even places we are familiar with can take on a menace stance.
I was once caught late in my pine forest. The shadows were slowly being swallowed by complete darkness.
The sound of twigs breaking under my feet spooked the crap out of me. I felt I was being followed.
I quickened my pace , I was so relieved when I was out on the main road and I could see twilight.
Angel barked , so most probably there was someone,
.. in my case I think it was just my imagination playing with me.
I enjoyed the read!
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
Ciao!,
At night even places we are familiar with can take on a menace stance.
I was once caught late in my pine forest. The shadows were slowly being swallowed by complete darkness.
The sound of twigs breaking under my feet spooked the crap out of me. I felt I was being followed.
I quickened my pace , I was so relieved when I was out on the main road and I could see twilight.
Angel barked , so most probably there was someone,
.. in my case I think it was just my imagination playing with me.
I enjoyed the read!
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Tempeste,
Thank you for the wonderful review. I think our mind plays tricks on us at night.
Cecilia
Comment from Angel Debbie
This has happened in real life. There has been stories in the papers and news around here where I live. You always have to be on the lookout especially at night with your dog. Or even without. Great story I hope that is all it was and you didn't experience anything like it. Thanks for sharing. Please be careful.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
This has happened in real life. There has been stories in the papers and news around here where I live. You always have to be on the lookout especially at night with your dog. Or even without. Great story I hope that is all it was and you didn't experience anything like it. Thanks for sharing. Please be careful.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Thank you for the wonderful review. It a sad world we live. Sicko's all around. I live out in the country so we don't have to worry to much about the sicko's.
Cecilia
Comment from lancellot
A nice flash fiction story. Just a few suggestions, of what to look for to trim the reading a bit, if so desired.
notes:
It was a dark night and the moon was shinning bright.
-or-
It was a dark night, and the moon shined bright.
I had taken her out often by myself and we never had any problems.
-or-
I took Angel out often and never had any problems.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
A nice flash fiction story. Just a few suggestions, of what to look for to trim the reading a bit, if so desired.
notes:
It was a dark night and the moon was shinning bright.
-or-
It was a dark night, and the moon shined bright.
I had taken her out often by myself and we never had any problems.
-or-
I took Angel out often and never had any problems.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Lancellot,
Thank you for the wonderful review. I will take your suggestion and change those two lines.
Cecilia
Comment from royowen
I must admit I have no answer either, and obviously your hearing is fine, otherwise why else would you hear it? But I see it's labelled fiction, beautifully written Cecilia, well done, blessings Roy
Typo : sensed it to(o)
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
I must admit I have no answer either, and obviously your hearing is fine, otherwise why else would you hear it? But I see it's labelled fiction, beautifully written Cecilia, well done, blessings Roy
Typo : sensed it to(o)
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Roy,
Thank you for the great review. I appreciate you. God Bless you.
Cecilia
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My pleasure
Comment from patcelaw
this is a nicely written story, and I enjoyed listening to it, I wish you a very good evening and a very good day. By the way in your opening paragraph you said the world the moon was shining bright and it should be shining. You have an extra N in the word shining. Patricia.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
this is a nicely written story, and I enjoyed listening to it, I wish you a very good evening and a very good day. By the way in your opening paragraph you said the world the moon was shining bright and it should be shining. You have an extra N in the word shining. Patricia.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2024
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Thank you for the wonderful review. I will fix that mistake right away. Bless you my friend.
Cecilia