Comment from LJbutterfly

Excellent

I appreciate how tactfully you described two young people discovering for the first time, the ecstasy (not the drug) of sexual pleasure. I'm glad Brian considered Julia's wishes. I'm also glad Julia was protected, and could give the okay. Another great chapter.

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Aug-2024

Thanks very much, Lorraine. I really appreciate your comments about this. Writing a scene that explicitly was new for me, so I'm glad it came across as it did for you.

Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Exceptional

Oh wow, Jim! I don't know about them but I'm pretty exhausted after that marathon:)) But how well you did it, never gratuitous, just two young innocent teenagers finding this sanctuary of sexual liberation after all they've been through. I must admit I wasn't expecting this quite yet but it was a wonderful boost, in particular for Julia, to find her release from all that long-held tension in something other than narcotics. Is this their pinnacle of happiness before a tragedy, I wonder? I look forward to reading more. Thanks for sharing this exceptional write about young love! Debbie

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Aug-2024

I'm with you there, Debbie. I could only dream about (or write about) that amount of activity now. I really appreciate your comments about how the chapter came out and those 6 stars too.

This seemed to be just what Julia needed to reduce the tension of the upcoming audition. It seemed to happen naturally enough; it certainly wasn't Brian's intention when he drove up there.

I think they'll ride this high for a while, but you know it won't all be fun and games throughout. This story kind of goes in waves.

Comment from royowen

Excellent

Where to now? With these two undeniably in love and ready to be joined in a permanent, but not inconvenient relationship, too far apart for seeing each other more regularly, something might have to change, their young careers are important, beautifully written Jim, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Aug-2024

Thanks very much, Roy. Where to, indeed? So many possibilities at this point. I'm not even sure what they all are because I haven't written it yet, but I do know there will be both ups and downs along the way.

Comment from Tom Horonzy

Excellent

If I was you, and I couldn't be, I would submit this story to a producer of film, as the content would make delicious viewing. And then my mind slip a gear, and I thought she is going to end up with child.

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 31-Jul-2024

Nah, we don't want to mess up a good thing. Maybe some day, but not now.

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

I think Lance would be proud of your ecstatic descriptions!
What I liked best is the care and concern that Brian had for Julia to come all the way to be with her and to be extra careful to check that it was her choice to proceed. If only he had such self-control with the drug that he would create in the future!

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 31-Jul-2024

Yeah, we'll see what he has to say about it. Probably too tame for him :)

Very good point about the self control now versus the future. There's a big difference, though, that you'll see when we get back to that part of the story.

Comment from Lindsey Russell

Exceptional

I love this chapter not because of the content as much as the ending. I'm a sucker for happy endings in chapters and in entire books. Good luck with this and happy writing!

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 31-Jul-2024

I'm glad you enjoyed it, Lindsey, for whatever reason. This is the first time I've ever written an explicit sex scene in one of my novels, and I debated whether or not to write it this way, but I decided to because the pleasurable feelings generated during sex are important in the story for which one of the themes is pleasure vs pain, and I will be exploring the role of endorphins and substances like dopamine that are produced during sex.

As advertised, Brian will eventually create a painkiller that will divorce the two (pleasure and pain-relief) from being in the same drug, so it's important to lay the groundwork for this. I didn't think it would be as effective without getting a bit graphic.

reply by Lindsey Russell on 31-Jul-2024

I really liked it!

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

I'm wondering how Julia being accepted into Juilliard will affect their relationship. I'm sure it will. I can't wait to read more.

Who was I to argue with that? and we resumed where we had left off. ('that? We' -- or 'that? And we')

This lasted for several minutes until I couldn't hold it in me any longer, (you can omit 'me' it's understood)

She hesitated before answering. "I never really thought about it that way. (answering,)

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 31-Jul-2024

My son and daughter-in-law were high school sweethearts who went to different colleges in different states, but they were able to maintain their relationship for the 4 years they were apart. So, I think Brian and Julia have a chance, but it isn't guaranteed.

Thanks for the edits. The first one is actually acceptable as is. It passed my grammar-checker, and I looked it up. It's okay to have a question mark within a sentence. Another example would be:

When will we go? is a legitimate question.

The third one is optional and works either way, but I think I like your way better.

Comment from BethShelby

Excellent

I think Brian being being their helped her relax and overcome her nervousness and fear. These two really seem in love but we still seem a long way from where Brian was when this story began. Maybe being apart with Julia at Juilliard isn't going to work out so good for them.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 31-Jul-2024

There's still a long way to go until then. That took place when he was 32, and he's only 18 now. There will be a few ups and downs before we get back to that.

Comment from Wayne Fowler

Excellent

Well written.
You didn't say anything about the 'cherry' part.
I'm a bit surprised that the sex didn't play on Julia's psyche a bit, maybe doubling her tension.
Best wishes.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 31-Jul-2024

---

reply by the author on 31-Jul-2024

It's going to relieve it. She'll be quite relaxed for the audition. I think she's wanted it for a while.