Black Shape Confusion
A Shakespearean Sonnet19 total reviews
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
An excellent entry for the Sonnet Poetry Contest. A lovely, classical feel to this poem. Shakespeare would be proud. My favorite line:
A black perception test of Rorschach ilk?
The ending was perfect. All in all, worthy of my 6. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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An excellent entry for the Sonnet Poetry Contest. A lovely, classical feel to this poem. Shakespeare would be proud. My favorite line:
A black perception test of Rorschach ilk?
The ending was perfect. All in all, worthy of my 6. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Thank you so much Marilyn for your wonderful review. I appreciate that you liked it enough to award a 6.
Comment from tfawcus
Just marvellous, Tom. The best sonnet I've read here in many a long year. Worth a six for this image alone, a kite of lost black silk. I can't see any other entry even coming close.
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Just marvellous, Tom. The best sonnet I've read here in many a long year. Worth a six for this image alone, a kite of lost black silk. I can't see any other entry even coming close.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Thank you Tony. I really appreciate your enthusiastic support. That 6 makes my day.
Comment from Mark Jackson
This brings to mind Poe and "The Raven" not only the imagery but also the use of archaic language "shouldst" and "Yea". I really like the dark sinister tone which is broken by "lovely evening song". The final couplet makes light of the whole fearsome development and brought a little laugh from me. Great work 5 stars.
Just so you know moles are not blind. If they were Kenneth Grahame would have had his Mole wearing dark glasses.
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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This brings to mind Poe and "The Raven" not only the imagery but also the use of archaic language "shouldst" and "Yea". I really like the dark sinister tone which is broken by "lovely evening song". The final couplet makes light of the whole fearsome development and brought a little laugh from me. Great work 5 stars.
Just so you know moles are not blind. If they were Kenneth Grahame would have had his Mole wearing dark glasses.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2024
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Thank you Mark for your comments. Most astute. What a fine thing when I achieve a little laugh from a reader. I guess "nearsighted" wouldn't have worked as well with my meter, Lol.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
This sounds VERY Shakespearean! And the mention of a black form - a bird - sounds like Poe speaking.
I like the line "possibly a kite of lost black silk".
This is a wonderful Sonnet, and it says below the poem that it is entered in the contest, but why is it featured under stories? You want it under poems, especially since not all poets cross over to our side of the page to read prose. I'm a prose writer who clicked on your "story" and immediately became confused. Still, I'm glad to have read it.
Contact Tom (Contact Us under Community), and he can help you.
Good luck getting it switched and with the contest.
xo
Pam
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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This sounds VERY Shakespearean! And the mention of a black form - a bird - sounds like Poe speaking.
I like the line "possibly a kite of lost black silk".
This is a wonderful Sonnet, and it says below the poem that it is entered in the contest, but why is it featured under stories? You want it under poems, especially since not all poets cross over to our side of the page to read prose. I'm a prose writer who clicked on your "story" and immediately became confused. Still, I'm glad to have read it.
Contact Tom (Contact Us under Community), and he can help you.
Good luck getting it switched and with the contest.
xo
Pam
Comment Written 24-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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Thank you Pam. I will do that.
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I took your advice and Tom fixed it.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I did not know that the word tantalise was derived from (Tantalus) I learned something here. I enjoyed the sentiment in your sonnet here and metre and rhymes, a joy to read, love Dolly x x x
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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I did not know that the word tantalise was derived from (Tantalus) I learned something here. I enjoyed the sentiment in your sonnet here and metre and rhymes, a joy to read, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 24-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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Thank you Dolly. I didn?t know it either until I researched for a myth on reaching, and read about him. It always great to discover something new.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
This is a real Shakespearean sonnet, Tom, and very well written too. I love the old English voice that comes through, and I had to smile at the final couplet. If I could suggest one thing, nothing to do with your lovely poem, but if you go back and edit the spacing at the top. Drop the start down 4 line spaces so the lines all together and read better. I think it will do your poem justice as it's such a lovely one. Good luck in the contest, my friend. Warmest hugs. Sandra xx
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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This is a real Shakespearean sonnet, Tom, and very well written too. I love the old English voice that comes through, and I had to smile at the final couplet. If I could suggest one thing, nothing to do with your lovely poem, but if you go back and edit the spacing at the top. Drop the start down 4 line spaces so the lines all together and read better. I think it will do your poem justice as it's such a lovely one. Good luck in the contest, my friend. Warmest hugs. Sandra xx
Comment Written 23-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2024
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Thank you Sandra. I?ll do that.
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It looks perfect now, Tom. 😊xx
Comment from royowen
Somehow there's something that borders on the mystical when comes into dream reading or inkblot reading that supposedly betrays one's personality, or something from the past, that I simply don't accept. Man playing God, only a millimetre from sorcery. I think we can all decide our behaviour, good or bad, strange, loving or antisocial, in my case with God's help and support. Beautifully written my friend. Blessings Roy
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2024
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Somehow there's something that borders on the mystical when comes into dream reading or inkblot reading that supposedly betrays one's personality, or something from the past, that I simply don't accept. Man playing God, only a millimetre from sorcery. I think we can all decide our behaviour, good or bad, strange, loving or antisocial, in my case with God's help and support. Beautifully written my friend. Blessings Roy
Comment Written 23-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2024
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Thank you Roy. Your reasoning is sound on the point inkblots. I am glad you enjoyed my poem and really appreciate the extra star.
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Bless you, a very thoughtful and skilful post.
Comment from lancellot
This is very good and written with flair. I found myself captured by the Poe like feel of it.
Now, I would only suggest, a message to Tom. This is listed as prose, and I would hate for you be disqualified from the poetry contest because of that little mistake.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2024
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This is very good and written with flair. I found myself captured by the Poe like feel of it.
Now, I would only suggest, a message to Tom. This is listed as prose, and I would hate for you be disqualified from the poetry contest because of that little mistake.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2024
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Oh Thank you.
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Oh my, how can I fix this? No wonder I had so much trouble formatting the text to go under the image. I I delete it, I lose the 3 reviews Inalready got ( including a 6), plus the $25 dollars i spent for certificates and pumps.
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Just send Tom (admin) a message with the title and ask him to switch it to poetry.
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I took your advice and Tom fixed it. Thank you.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I thought your sonnet was wonderful. I love how he observes a mysterious form above them and you slowly paint a picture of the bird. This was very creative. Flowed perfectly. Well done!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2024
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I thought your sonnet was wonderful. I love how he observes a mysterious form above them and you slowly paint a picture of the bird. This was very creative. Flowed perfectly. Well done!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2024
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Thank you Michael. I appreciate the comments and astute observation.