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Miranda's Trouble In Paradise

Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Reprimand "
Miranda tries to find Dougie.

24 total reviews 
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

"Momma comes to call?" It was Mr. Sterling.

She shouldn't feel that way about Mitch. He
is so patient with her. She had better learn to
apologize, but first to accept his apology. he's right , they seem to have different perspectives on what love means. Well done, Gretchen. Just that heading needs changed. Nancy:)


 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    I got ahead of my self. Lol. Next chapter focuses on momma. Thanks for the catch. Also, thanks for the awesome review and stars. Gretchen
Comment from barbara.wilkey
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What's going on with Mr. Starling?? I'm interested in that. Miranda needs to walk herself to Mitch and apologize before it's too late. I knew she'd blow it.

"Don't blow it with Mitch. He is a once in a lifetime guy. Just pout a little, let him ask for forgiveness and then get over it." (GREAT advice, but will Miranda follow it?)

He smile fades as she looks back at me. "Somethings off with that one." (Her???)

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Thanks, Barbara. I was telling Miranda the same thing as I was writing it. Who knows what is going to happen next. Thanks for catching the spag. Gretchen
Comment from John Ciarmello
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AHA! I knew there was something odd about that geezer!

The subtleties in your writing are perfect and give a mico glint of what is coming. That's not only excellent writing, but it's essential to what we're allowed to ponder before the next chapter other than the hanger.

You have that perfect control over your readers, and I'm jealous! LOL

For example, The fact that Miranda is talking to her reflection in full-blown conversation gives a glint into her mental state, and automatically, you root for Mitch and the boys regarding her getting help. Their breakup adds to the suspense about whether she gets the help or has that ship now sailed.

I'm so impressed with you, Gretchen! Best, JohnC

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Don't be jealous, I've read your writing. You are excellent. We just write different. Everybody has their own way. Thank you for this. I did laugh when you said I knew something was up with the old geezer. Great instincts. Thanks for this. Gretchen
Comment from BethShelby
Excellent
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Hopefully it isn't really the end for Mitch. A breakup should have more closure than that. I had a breakup like that one when I was eighteen and ending up calling him and telling him I'd marry him. Now, I'm starting to wonder if something strange is going on with the little old man. I assume Miranda will meet with the lady shrink to talk as she promised.
Beth

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Miranda did like the shrink, but she's too hurt with the way Mitch handled things. The Little old man scares me. Thank you so much. Gretchen
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent
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Oh dear me. If he is trying to be a friend in order to commit some heinous act .... Miranda needs to swallow her pride and get back together with Mitch, for her own safety. He will still be watching over her though, from a distance. Well written!
Wendy

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Hes after something just not sure why he's using Miranda as his go to. Thank you so much, Wendy. Gretchen
Comment from Sankey
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

A bit sad. I hope she and Mitch make up. She needs a friend. This was another good read. Just one teeny weeny little spag.He(r) smile fades as she looks back

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Thank you so much. Thanks for the edit help as well. I really am glad you are enjoying this tale. Gretchen
Comment from JSD
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'sic'?

Another lovely episode. Well done. Great internal monologue with the mirror and the build up of the row is perfectly described. Been there so many times. The things we do for pride!

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Pride is a catapult for a lot of things. Both good and bad. Gretchen
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
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I get the feeling here that Miranda is so distracted by her love for Mitch that she is missing other cues and needs to keep herself focused. She wasn't entirely in the wrong to object to his manipulation with the therapist and now she's taking Mr Starling on face value. Thank Goodness for Rita's keen eye.There is a small edits:"He(r) smile fades as she looks back at me." Excellent as ever, Gretchen, with superb dialogue enhancing your character building. Debbie

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Miranda is very distracted. She needs to figure out what her priorities are. Her being right or getting help. Thanks for this. Gretchen
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Excellent
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Very well done. Nicely written.
Your Miranda character is true to herself. And true to life. People 'do' behave stupidly, against their own best interests.
Best wishes.

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    I can definitely attest to the behaving stupidly. Lol. Pride gets in the way of a lot of good things. Lol. Thank you for this. Gretchen
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
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I sense the feeling of betrayal here. If someone had secretly arranged a shrink to casually chat with me, I would also be annoyed. I know those feelings of betrayal when a friend of mine once repeated something I said in confidence to another person and hurt their feelings. I never trusted that friend again with my private thoughts.

I loved this line Gretchen, you have such a wonderful way with words:

(I nod, my sharpened tongue suddenly seized with a case of paralysis).

Mitch has been shown some coolness which he deserved, but not sure if things can be repaired between them at this point.

Another fine chapter Gretchen, always a pleasure to read your work, love Dolly x x x

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2023


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
    Things probably won't be the same. They are coming at this love thing from two different angles. He's open and she's closed off. Who knows where or if they will meet. Gretchen
reply by Dolly'sPoems on 28-Oct-2023
    And yet she hope he was coming back in your post x x x