Playing Dead
A short story about a frog playing dead.16 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This short short story, Playing Dead, is a funny story of the young escaping the old in the seemingly endless game of let's hide the salami.
There is a subtle tense shift from the beginning present tense to the past.
"Here I am again." begins the present tense story, but I feel "the old fart Freddy was..."
If you agree, I would think that fixing the first part would be easier.
Happy day.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
This short short story, Playing Dead, is a funny story of the young escaping the old in the seemingly endless game of let's hide the salami.
There is a subtle tense shift from the beginning present tense to the past.
"Here I am again." begins the present tense story, but I feel "the old fart Freddy was..."
If you agree, I would think that fixing the first part would be easier.
Happy day.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
-
Thanks for the feedback. I appreciate your reading and reviewing. I appreciate all the stars. Have a blessed day.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very cute and very well written Flash Fiction you have penned about the female frog playing dead so Freddy will stay away, but it was not successful! lol Thank you for sharing! love and blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
This is a very cute and very well written Flash Fiction you have penned about the female frog playing dead so Freddy will stay away, but it was not successful! lol Thank you for sharing! love and blessings, Teri
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing. I appreciate the many stars. Have a blessed day.
-
You are so welcome! love and blessings, Teri
-
You are so welcome! love and blessings, Teri
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this with us. A friend's daughter happens to be dissecting a frog today. Interesting coincidence. I enjoyed reading. You're right playing dead won't work on Freddy.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
Thank you for sharing this with us. A friend's daughter happens to be dissecting a frog today. Interesting coincidence. I enjoyed reading. You're right playing dead won't work on Freddy.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing. I appreciate the many stars. Have a blessed day.
Comment from lyenochka
Loved it! You made me laugh with the antics and how you took us into the mind of the female frog. I'm glad Freddy escaped the dissection, too. It's hard world for frogs out there! Great job on your club entry.
So glad you recovered from Covid. We certainly are not out of the woods from that plague yet.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
Loved it! You made me laugh with the antics and how you took us into the mind of the female frog. I'm glad Freddy escaped the dissection, too. It's hard world for frogs out there! Great job on your club entry.
So glad you recovered from Covid. We certainly are not out of the woods from that plague yet.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
-
Thanks for reading and reviewing. I appreciate the many stars.
I have not seen much of your writing lately.
-
I'm slowing down as I'm settling in to our new house and meeting with family more. Thanks for noticing. 💞😊
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
lol That poor frog. For her to have to play dead to be left alone is horrible. This is excellent story for the challenge. Your presentation is good and I appreciate your explanation about the image you lost. All of your descriptions are cute. You use expressive words and good imagery that will draw in a readers.
Best wishes,
Alexandra
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
lol That poor frog. For her to have to play dead to be left alone is horrible. This is excellent story for the challenge. Your presentation is good and I appreciate your explanation about the image you lost. All of your descriptions are cute. You use expressive words and good imagery that will draw in a readers.
Best wishes,
Alexandra
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing. I appreciate the many stars. Have a blessed day.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
There is humour here, but also sadness as Freddy has a bum knee because he was dissected which gave me the horrors. A fun post for the club, love Dolly x x x
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
There is humour here, but also sadness as Freddy has a bum knee because he was dissected which gave me the horrors. A fun post for the club, love Dolly x x x
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing. I appreciate the many stars.Have a blessed day.