Tanka (golden afternoon)
Poetry34 total reviews
Comment from Sarah Tummey
I like Tanka - both writing and reading them. Love the image of the sunbeams sipping water out of the puddles. You've sketched the afternoon with your writing.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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I like Tanka - both writing and reading them. Love the image of the sunbeams sipping water out of the puddles. You've sketched the afternoon with your writing.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much Sarah!!
Melissa
Comment from nancy_e_davis
This is just lovely, Melissa.
Very descriptive and well written.
The Graphic is jut beautiful.
Very well done indeed. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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This is just lovely, Melissa.
Very descriptive and well written.
The Graphic is jut beautiful.
Very well done indeed. Nancy:)
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Hello Nancy. Thank you so much for your wonderful comments and review. Hugs, my friend.
Melissa
Comment from Heather Knight
Your poem is as beautiful as all the ones you write.
I like to think of those sunbeams drinking from a puddle.
And describing the thunderclouds as grumpy is a great idea.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Your poem is as beautiful as all the ones you write.
I like to think of those sunbeams drinking from a puddle.
And describing the thunderclouds as grumpy is a great idea.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Hi Maria... thank you so much for your lovely comments. I am really happy that you liked it and enjoyed the 'sipping sunbeams'... I love to see the sun come out after a heavy rain. Somehow, it speaks to me. Hugs!
Melissa
Comment from Jim Wile
This was a very nice tanka with such a beautiful picture to go with it. I love how often you see a stormy or very cloudy day when the sun finally breaks through and sends some rays down to brighten what otherwise would have been a gloomy day. You've captured that event beautifully! Jim
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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This was a very nice tanka with such a beautiful picture to go with it. I love how often you see a stormy or very cloudy day when the sun finally breaks through and sends some rays down to brighten what otherwise would have been a gloomy day. You've captured that event beautifully! Jim
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thank you very much, Jim. There is something about seeing the sun come out after a hard rain that just speaks to me :). Had to try to put it into words ~ LOL. Thanks again!
Melissa
Comment from Mrs. KT
Good morning, Melissa!
Exquisite Tanka!
I so love the imagery as it speaks to the best of my days.
Your Tanka form is "spot on!"
I long for those golden afternoons = just around the corner... I hope!
Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Good morning, Melissa!
Exquisite Tanka!
I so love the imagery as it speaks to the best of my days.
Your Tanka form is "spot on!"
I long for those golden afternoons = just around the corner... I hope!
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thank you very much, Diane. There is something about seeing the sun come out after a hard rain that just speaks to me :). Had to try to put it into words ~ LOL. Hopefully, you all will warm up and enjoy a few springtime days... we are in full bloom here in VA... Thanks again!
Melissa
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Melissa,
This is a well done tanka that describes a summer afternoon well.
I like the personification of the puddles and the clouds. I like all the consonance with s and r. It kind of sooths you.
This can also be said of sunny Winter days and the puddles from melted snows receding.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Hi Melissa,
This is a well done tanka that describes a summer afternoon well.
I like the personification of the puddles and the clouds. I like all the consonance with s and r. It kind of sooths you.
This can also be said of sunny Winter days and the puddles from melted snows receding.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thank you very much, Joan. There is something about seeing the sun come out after a hard rain that just speaks to me :). Had to try to put it into words ~ LOL. Thanks again!
Melissa
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You are most kindly welcome, Melissa.
Joan
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Very nice image and presentation, Melissa.
-You have written a good tanka with a good topic.
-Effective images set the scene in the first two lines.
-A very good pivot line.
-The closing lines show the impact of sunbeams
and "golden afternoons."
-Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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-Very nice image and presentation, Melissa.
-You have written a good tanka with a good topic.
-Effective images set the scene in the first two lines.
-A very good pivot line.
-The closing lines show the impact of sunbeams
and "golden afternoons."
-Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thank you very much, Pam. There is something about seeing the sun come out after a hard rain that just speaks to me :). Had to try to put it into words ~ LOL. Thanks again!
Melissa
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You are welcome, Melissa, and thanks for sharing.
Comment from patcelaw
This is a beautifully presented and worded format. I enjoyed reading it very much. I do wish you the very best with all of your writing as you continue to share with us. Patricia.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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This is a beautifully presented and worded format. I enjoyed reading it very much. I do wish you the very best with all of your writing as you continue to share with us. Patricia.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thank you very much, Patricia. There is something about seeing the sun come out after a hard rain that just speaks to me :). Had to try to put it into words ~ LOL. Thanks again!
Melissa
Comment from June Sargent
Well, the thunder clouds here are grumpy, but they're not fleeing! But, we can feel the warmer air sneaking in. It won't be long before spring and summer take over here in New England. Your tanka had great imagery of sunbeams sipping the water! Well done, Melissa.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Well, the thunder clouds here are grumpy, but they're not fleeing! But, we can feel the warmer air sneaking in. It won't be long before spring and summer take over here in New England. Your tanka had great imagery of sunbeams sipping the water! Well done, Melissa.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thank you very much, June. There is something about seeing the sun come out after a hard rain that just speaks to me :). Had to try to put it into words ~ LOL. I hope you all get warmer weather soon and can experience the blooms and blossoms . We are enjoying lovely weather at the moment... 74 degrees. :). Thanks again!
Melissa
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I love the sense of glory in your fine Tanka Melissa as we always appreciate a glistening sun peeping through the cloud to warm and delight us, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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I love the sense of glory in your fine Tanka Melissa as we always appreciate a glistening sun peeping through the cloud to warm and delight us, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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Thank you very much, Dolly. There is something about seeing the sun come out after a hard rain that just speaks to me :). Had to try to put it into words ~ LOL. Thanks again!
Melissa