When it felt safe to cry
my feelings after the earthquake44 total reviews
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
I can't imagine an earthquake, but I know straight line winds that are as powerful as tornadoes. They only last a few minutes but are very intense and destructive. Your earthquake seems more personal as it leaves debris within the house. Still relying on your wheelchair means the earthquake attacks you personally. There is no timeframe to letting go of fear and sadness.
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I can't imagine an earthquake, but I know straight line winds that are as powerful as tornadoes. They only last a few minutes but are very intense and destructive. Your earthquake seems more personal as it leaves debris within the house. Still relying on your wheelchair means the earthquake attacks you personally. There is no timeframe to letting go of fear and sadness.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
Comment from Jay Squires
Hey Jesse ... I'm assuming this was the earthquake in northern California a week or so back? I live in the San Joaquin Valley and I didn't feel it at all, though some did. Oh, what a horror you went through, and I assume alone. I know you had recent medical attention. Is the wheelchair the result of that. We're all a family here -- a whole lot of unashamed criers.
Jay
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Hey Jesse ... I'm assuming this was the earthquake in northern California a week or so back? I live in the San Joaquin Valley and I didn't feel it at all, though some did. Oh, what a horror you went through, and I assume alone. I know you had recent medical attention. Is the wheelchair the result of that. We're all a family here -- a whole lot of unashamed criers.
Jay
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
Comment from LateBloomer
Hi Jesse, when the earthquake happened, I thought of you immediately, and wondered how you were doing. Sorry for not reaching out at the time, although I wanted to--my granddaughter spent her 3rd birthday in the hospital. She was very sick, and I had to go and help out.
Your story illustrates the destruction that an earthquake can do, and not just property damage, but damage to the health and welfare of the people--both physically and mentally. Jesse, you went through a horrific experience. I'm glad that you and Sunny are ok for the most part--time will tell. Hang in there. Did you have great damage and losses to your home? Be well ~ stay safe. Keep the blue waters flowing. Margaret ~ LateBloomer
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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Hi Jesse, when the earthquake happened, I thought of you immediately, and wondered how you were doing. Sorry for not reaching out at the time, although I wanted to--my granddaughter spent her 3rd birthday in the hospital. She was very sick, and I had to go and help out.
Your story illustrates the destruction that an earthquake can do, and not just property damage, but damage to the health and welfare of the people--both physically and mentally. Jesse, you went through a horrific experience. I'm glad that you and Sunny are ok for the most part--time will tell. Hang in there. Did you have great damage and losses to your home? Be well ~ stay safe. Keep the blue waters flowing. Margaret ~ LateBloomer
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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Thank you, Margaret, for thinking of me when the earthquake happened. Thanks for the kind words and for wishing me well and hoping I stay safe.
Your kindness is overflowing.
Jesse
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Yikes.
Jesse, this was so well-written that I felt as if I were there, observing the aftermath and trying to recalibrate and make sense of it all.
I'm so sorry you had to endure this, and, more than anything, I hope you never have to do so again. I'm glad you were able to cry because that is an integral step in the healing process.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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Yikes.
Jesse, this was so well-written that I felt as if I were there, observing the aftermath and trying to recalibrate and make sense of it all.
I'm so sorry you had to endure this, and, more than anything, I hope you never have to do so again. I'm glad you were able to cry because that is an integral step in the healing process.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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Thanks, Rachelle. Your feeling as if you were there with me is the feeling I was trying to create with this piece. And yes my crying is an integral step in healing from the wounds (figuratively speaking.)
I hope you enjoy the new year's celebration of a lifetime!
Jesse
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You, too!
Comment from Ulla
Hi Jesse, I can understand your fear and the reaction to it after it was over, especially as you were dependent on your wheelchair. You must have felt utterly helpless.
I have been in a couple of earthquakes. A 5.5 in Tokyo and a 7.2 in Los Angeles where the earth never stopped moving for three days. After that last one, I had nightmares for quite some time after be I got back home.
I used to be very a flight attendant.
Thanks for sharing this with us. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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Hi Jesse, I can understand your fear and the reaction to it after it was over, especially as you were dependent on your wheelchair. You must have felt utterly helpless.
I have been in a couple of earthquakes. A 5.5 in Tokyo and a 7.2 in Los Angeles where the earth never stopped moving for three days. After that last one, I had nightmares for quite some time after be I got back home.
I used to be very a flight attendant.
Thanks for sharing this with us. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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Thanks, Ulla, for sharing your horrific stories of earthquakes in Tokyo and Los Angeles. And thank you for understanding how alone I felt since I am confined to a wheelchair.
You're a good friend.
Jesse
Comment from mermaids
I certainly would cry after an earthquake, it is such a severe natural phenomenon. I am glad you allowed yourself to cry, releasing the pain and stress of being in the quake. I am sure many can relate to your story and I am glad you and Sunny are safe.
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I certainly would cry after an earthquake, it is such a severe natural phenomenon. I am glad you allowed yourself to cry, releasing the pain and stress of being in the quake. I am sure many can relate to your story and I am glad you and Sunny are safe.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
Comment from Begin Again
Sharing your story and exposing how emotional and vulnerable you (or anyone else) would be in such a difficult and dangerous time (compounded by the use of your wheelchair) is at the top of the mountain, Jesse. Regardless of how emotional a person appears on the outside, I believe the deeper fears remain hidden and spill over when no one sees. You shared those moments and it took strength to do so. Great job!
I hope the after shocks have ceased and you are able to find some normalcy again.
Hugs, Carol
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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Sharing your story and exposing how emotional and vulnerable you (or anyone else) would be in such a difficult and dangerous time (compounded by the use of your wheelchair) is at the top of the mountain, Jesse. Regardless of how emotional a person appears on the outside, I believe the deeper fears remain hidden and spill over when no one sees. You shared those moments and it took strength to do so. Great job!
I hope the after shocks have ceased and you are able to find some normalcy again.
Hugs, Carol
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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Thanks, Carol for this insightful and truly amazing account of how it feels to be in a wheelchair and the shared moments after the quake had stopped. I will hopefully return to normalcy when the aftershocks cease and perhaps when the new year arrives.
Thanks also for the extra star and the hugs.
Jesse
Comment from jmdg1954
I've never been through something so tragic. Ten years ago Superstorm Sandy came roaring through NJ & NY and destroyed billions of dollars in property. Thank God we simply lost a few roofing tiles, that was it. But the waiting and watching in fear was enough.
Take a deep breath and get your apartment back in order. Maybe make those changes you've been putting off doing. Make your home, your home again.
Blessings my friend, John
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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I've never been through something so tragic. Ten years ago Superstorm Sandy came roaring through NJ & NY and destroyed billions of dollars in property. Thank God we simply lost a few roofing tiles, that was it. But the waiting and watching in fear was enough.
Take a deep breath and get your apartment back in order. Maybe make those changes you've been putting off doing. Make your home, your home again.
Blessings my friend, John
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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Thanks, John. Your advice of making my home my home again is what I intend to do as soon as I can get my life in order. You are the only one with such sage advice. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Jesse
Comment from Paul McFarland
It is hard for me to understand what you went through as a wheelchair person. Many of the things that I brush off as a mere inconvenience are very disturbing things to you. Thanks for reminding me of this.
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It is hard for me to understand what you went through as a wheelchair person. Many of the things that I brush off as a mere inconvenience are very disturbing things to you. Thanks for reminding me of this.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
The striking thing about this piece - more than what occurred physically - is the emotional aftermath. Though they last only a few moments in time, events like the one you describe can stay with us for a lifetime in one way or another. You mentioned that it took a while before you could actually cry - that reminds me of the death of loved ones. When someone close to me dies, I wait until the funeral is over and everyone has gone before I can sit down and cry.
Two things sorely missed here: when did this happen and where? Where were you that was prone to earthquakes? California? Did this happen recently? I think this information would make your story a little more personal.
Hope you had a wonderful Christmas and will continue to heal and make progress in 2023!
Pam
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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The striking thing about this piece - more than what occurred physically - is the emotional aftermath. Though they last only a few moments in time, events like the one you describe can stay with us for a lifetime in one way or another. You mentioned that it took a while before you could actually cry - that reminds me of the death of loved ones. When someone close to me dies, I wait until the funeral is over and everyone has gone before I can sit down and cry.
Two things sorely missed here: when did this happen and where? Where were you that was prone to earthquakes? California? Did this happen recently? I think this information would make your story a little more personal.
Hope you had a wonderful Christmas and will continue to heal and make progress in 2023!
Pam
Comment Written 26-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2022
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Yes, Pam, the emotional aftermath will last a good long time for both Sunny and me.
I did not feel the need to tell details since I was explaining how I felt rather than reporting what happened and when.
Happy New Year, my friend!
Jesse