First Impressions
A first date does not go as usually expected15 total reviews
Comment from John Ciarmello
Well, your notes on the fanny parts certainly put a new spin on their conversation for me. Ha! I loved this, but there isn't much you write I don't like. I'm having a blast reading you, Mike. Another great write! Best, JohnC
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
Well, your notes on the fanny parts certainly put a new spin on their conversation for me. Ha! I loved this, but there isn't much you write I don't like. I'm having a blast reading you, Mike. Another great write! Best, JohnC
Comment Written 30-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
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Thanks, John :-). I was worried I may have taken it a bit too far for some, but I wanted it to be real (and the lady is based on someone I used to work with).
Mike
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Happy to hear it was work-related, lol. She is quite a character!
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I could just picture the man's face when he realised she was his date, but drink and food mellow the mind and he's soon enjoying her company. At least he knows what to expect, there's no hidden areas! LOL. This is a great contest entry, and so different to what others will write. I enjoyed it! Good luck. :)) Sandra
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
I could just picture the man's face when he realised she was his date, but drink and food mellow the mind and he's soon enjoying her company. At least he knows what to expect, there's no hidden areas! LOL. This is a great contest entry, and so different to what others will write. I enjoyed it! Good luck. :)) Sandra
Comment Written 30-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
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Thank you, Sandra :-). As I'm sure you noticed, there's a naughty little bit of me that likes to shock, and I let that out a bit here. Fun fact: this started out as a crime thriller script and was going to go a very different way, but it wasn't feeling right so I went down the straighter route of romance(ish).
Mike
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I think you chose the right route. You can use the original idea for another story. 😊
Comment from the13thpoet
Hello Fleedleflump a good day to you. I hope all is well with you. I enjoyed your first date contest entry, I liked the realness and relatability of the characters. Your script kept me engaged and entertained. Good job and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
Hello Fleedleflump a good day to you. I hope all is well with you. I enjoyed your first date contest entry, I liked the realness and relatability of the characters. Your script kept me engaged and entertained. Good job and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
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Thank you :-). It was fun writing the realistic dialogue.
Mike
Comment from Lloyd T. Okoko
Great read; and a pleasurable one at that.
The objective correlative of your work reminisces a meeting of two diametrically opposed lovers that are seemingly gelling together.
The work highlights a strong structural outlay in terms of setting, locale and time of day; with a ravishing night life language to match.
The work earns its texture through its effective use of anecdotes synonymous with nightlife.
Excellent work. Bravo.
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reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
Great read; and a pleasurable one at that.
The objective correlative of your work reminisces a meeting of two diametrically opposed lovers that are seemingly gelling together.
The work highlights a strong structural outlay in terms of setting, locale and time of day; with a ravishing night life language to match.
The work earns its texture through its effective use of anecdotes synonymous with nightlife.
Excellent work. Bravo.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Lloyd - really glad you enjoyed it!
Mike
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Remain Blessed.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Ha ha ha, this is quite a right Mike and that lady does not sound like any lady I have ever met in my life before! I have been on a few dates, people I have met on line, I can tell in the first few seconds whether I want to stay or leave. It takes all sorts and the standard of men is quite poor but this is about the standard of women, but hey, this guy actually came round to this honest dialogue, I think you pushed the boundaries a lot in this write, but I am not at all offended and I thought it was entertaining and funny. My dates showed their true colours within minutes of meeting them and once my decision was made there was no turning back! I legged it! Ha ha ha! A fine write, raw and lively, love Dolly x
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reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
Ha ha ha, this is quite a right Mike and that lady does not sound like any lady I have ever met in my life before! I have been on a few dates, people I have met on line, I can tell in the first few seconds whether I want to stay or leave. It takes all sorts and the standard of men is quite poor but this is about the standard of women, but hey, this guy actually came round to this honest dialogue, I think you pushed the boundaries a lot in this write, but I am not at all offended and I thought it was entertaining and funny. My dates showed their true colours within minutes of meeting them and once my decision was made there was no turning back! I legged it! Ha ha ha! A fine write, raw and lively, love Dolly x
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2022
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Thanks so much, Dolly :-). I just hope American readers can navigate the jungle of London slang! The lady in this is based on someone I used to know (not romantically - she was a work colleague). Many years later, people still talk about her fondly in the office - if nothing else, she definitely left an impression! I met my wife via a very early version of online dating, but thankfully I didn't need to go on too many before we found one another.
Hopefully most will read this and realise I was trying to be funny :-)
Mike