Remembering Yesterday
Viewing comments for Chapter 151 "Coping With Change"A widow's journey into her relationship with her
21 total reviews
Comment from royowen
It's a tragic time in our lives when we have to say goodbye to our parents parents parents, Elaine and I are both "orphans" and it seems like we we only have memories of them to treasure, that life just seems like a dream interlude in our lives. Beautifully written dear Beth, this episode must have costed an emotional toll, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
  |
It's a tragic time in our lives when we have to say goodbye to our parents parents parents, Elaine and I are both "orphans" and it seems like we we only have memories of them to treasure, that life just seems like a dream interlude in our lives. Beautifully written dear Beth, this episode must have costed an emotional toll, blessings Roy
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank Roy, It is one I dreaded writing because it was an emotional time and I sort of hated to relive it. I appreciate the review and comments.
Beth
-
Most welcome Beth
Comment from Spitfire
What a loyal family you have. I hope your children will take care of you when you need them. It makes me regret mistakes I made in the past regarding my mom. I liked the idea of putting down tile to eliminate the urine smell. Six stars for the details of caring for your Dad while he grieved.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
 |
What a loyal family you have. I hope your children will take care of you when you need them. It makes me regret mistakes I made in the past regarding my mom. I liked the idea of putting down tile to eliminate the urine smell. Six stars for the details of caring for your Dad while he grieved.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you so much for the review and comments. I actually feel if I had to leave this home, I'd rather be in an assisted living than with my kids. My new daughter-in-law who is Korean keeps begging me to come live with them and my son wants me to but I don't think so.
I really appreciate the six stars.
Beth
-
Yeap there might be a catch as in helping with the wash or babysitting grandchildren.
Comment from damommy
I know first hand what a job you had put on you then. For several years, I had to see about my uncle and my mother, both in their nineties. Luckily, they lived across the street from each other. Eventually, I had to hire people to help. I know what you mean about not crying when your mother passed. Like mine, you had lost her before her actual last breath. It's hard to love your mother. I'm so sorry for your loss.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
I know first hand what a job you had put on you then. For several years, I had to see about my uncle and my mother, both in their nineties. Luckily, they lived across the street from each other. Eventually, I had to hire people to help. I know what you mean about not crying when your mother passed. Like mine, you had lost her before her actual last breath. It's hard to love your mother. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you so much for the review and comments and for sharing your experience. She is been gone over nearly twenty-seven years. I still think of things I like to ask her. I'm older than she was when she died. That seems strange because I don't really feel old.
Beth
-
I know what you mean. I think of a thousand things I wish I'd asked her and my uncle while I had the chance. I didn't think of it then, but we shared so many things over the years. There are still times when I revert to being a little girl who wants her mother.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
My fathers doctor wouldn't let us take full time care of him. He had him put into a nursing home but that was not so bad because my brothers wife was a nurse and she worked there. He was more or less spoiled because he was her father-in-law. You did what you could, Beth.
You can't keep that up, it's too hard. I bet you found that out didn't you. God Bless you dear. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
My fathers doctor wouldn't let us take full time care of him. He had him put into a nursing home but that was not so bad because my brothers wife was a nurse and she worked there. He was more or less spoiled because he was her father-in-law. You did what you could, Beth.
You can't keep that up, it's too hard. I bet you found that out didn't you. God Bless you dear. Nancy:)
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you Nancy, I kept him nearly two years until he had go to hospital and when it looked as though I'd have to lift him I thought I might have to put him in a nursing home. He was there three days.
Beth
Comment from Ric Myworld
Dying isn't the worst they we ever have to do, it's what we have to go through to get there. And for sure we never have any idea what that might consist of, but we are all going to do it, and it's never easy. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
Dying isn't the worst they we ever have to do, it's what we have to go through to get there. And for sure we never have any idea what that might consist of, but we are all going to do it, and it's never easy. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you Ric. I appreciate the review. You are right. We're all in the same boat as for as having to die. Some have it worse than others. I'm not sure if the mental part of thinking about it isn't the worst for most of us.
Beth
Comment from Mickamus J
Thank you for sharing. It is always difficult when we lose someone so constant in our lives. It is clear that she took care of everything and no one had to be bothered or burdened. It was a loss.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
Thank you for sharing. It is always difficult when we lose someone so constant in our lives. It is clear that she took care of everything and no one had to be bothered or burdened. It was a loss.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you for an excellent review and comments. I was glad Mom had the everything taken care of at the funeral home. I sort of dreaded writing such a sad chapter.
Beth
Comment from Thatguypk
This is such a well-written chapter, Beth, and one with which I can empathize, having had to manage my own father in the later stages of his slow trip into dementia. The bathing and taking him to the toilet were so difficult at first, because he clung desperately to his dignity for as long as he could. I suppose we all have some experiences that replicate what you went through. Such is the nature of life and death and family. Thank you for sharing such a personal story.
PK
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
This is such a well-written chapter, Beth, and one with which I can empathize, having had to manage my own father in the later stages of his slow trip into dementia. The bathing and taking him to the toilet were so difficult at first, because he clung desperately to his dignity for as long as he could. I suppose we all have some experiences that replicate what you went through. Such is the nature of life and death and family. Thank you for sharing such a personal story.
PK
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you so much for the review. Death is something we all face but not everyone becomes a care-giver. As you say, it is hard for the one being cared for to give up their dignity but we can't be young forever. Thanks for sharing some of your experience.
Beth
Comment from Ben Colder
Beth, it is a sad thing to lose a loved one, especially a parent. However, if we know they are ready to meet Jesus it is somewhat joyful knowing they will no longer suffer. You did a good job with this. I have known men like your father.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
Beth, it is a sad thing to lose a loved one, especially a parent. However, if we know they are ready to meet Jesus it is somewhat joyful knowing they will no longer suffer. You did a good job with this. I have known men like your father.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you for the great review. If anyone was ever ready to meet Jesus, my mom was. I'm not worried about that. I don't know about my dad. He was a morally decent person, but he had a foul mouth and gave my mom a lot of problems. He didn't appreciate all she did. Still when she died, you would have thought he loved he more than life.
Beth
-
Hard to say about people.
Comment from Anne Johnston
Thank you for sharing this story, it must have been very hard to lose your mom that way and then to have to take over the care of your father. Looking after someone like that must take a lot of patience.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
Thank you for sharing this story, it must have been very hard to lose your mom that way and then to have to take over the care of your father. Looking after someone like that must take a lot of patience.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank Anne, It was a hard chapter for me to write. Those were bad times. I appreciate the fine revies.
Beth
-
You are welcome. God bless you for sharing these difficult times.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I know this was hard to write. Mom took care of Dad until she couldn't lift him any longer. She ended up putting him into a nursing home. It was hard, but she simply couldn't do it any longer.
The doctor came in the next morning and told me Mom might never be normal again. & You brought Dad to the hospital the next day in a borrowed wheel chair. & For the next two weeks, you and I stayed at Dad's home and let him do his grieving in his own room. (The 'next' need to be changed to 'following')
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
|
I know this was hard to write. Mom took care of Dad until she couldn't lift him any longer. She ended up putting him into a nursing home. It was hard, but she simply couldn't do it any longer.
The doctor came in the next morning and told me Mom might never be normal again. & You brought Dad to the hospital the next day in a borrowed wheel chair. & For the next two weeks, you and I stayed at Dad's home and let him do his grieving in his own room. (The 'next' need to be changed to 'following')
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2022
-
Thank you for the excellent review and for understanding it wasn't an easy chapter to write. I wonder when will I ever learn to use the word following. Thanks for the reminded once again.
Beth
