Two Dreams
Sharp in the fog of war.14 total reviews
Comment from dellsworthpoet
This story has a ring of reality. The pace is good. The images are crisp. The language is befitting to the subject. The ending has a nice twist. I especially liked the phrase "spray and pray".
A good read. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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This story has a ring of reality. The pace is good. The images are crisp. The language is befitting to the subject. The ending has a nice twist. I especially liked the phrase "spray and pray".
A good read. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 04-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Thank you Dells, I appreciate your review and look forward to your future reviews. R.
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You are welcome.
Comment from royowen
I like the way you've written this from the viewpoint of the perceived enemy in a Vietcong sniper. It turned out to be an ill conceived war, the same as the Afghanistan campaign, it's pretty hard to win what is essentially a civil war anyway, we must allow other countries to evolve in their own way. We wouldn't invade China or Russia because we don't like their politics would we? Beautifully written, blessings Roy
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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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I like the way you've written this from the viewpoint of the perceived enemy in a Vietcong sniper. It turned out to be an ill conceived war, the same as the Afghanistan campaign, it's pretty hard to win what is essentially a civil war anyway, we must allow other countries to evolve in their own way. We wouldn't invade China or Russia because we don't like their politics would we? Beautifully written, blessings Roy
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Comment Written 04-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Thank you Roy, there are always two sides to a story aren't there? When one takes another soldiers life ones conscience can be eased by respecting the fallen, enemy or not.
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Well done
Comment from Melissa Place
Great story! I absolutely loved it! I'm glad the US soldier survived. Best of luck in the contest, and best wishes on all of your writing endeavors!
Melissa
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Great story! I absolutely loved it! I'm glad the US soldier survived. Best of luck in the contest, and best wishes on all of your writing endeavors!
Melissa
Comment Written 04-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Thank you Melissa, your review and encouragement means a lot. R.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this writing prompt entry with us. I enjoy reading your posts and this one is no different. This is a good write. The only problem I see is you switch back and forth with POV without notifying your reader. You can't do that, you can switch POV but you need to notify your readers first. I use *****.
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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Thank you for sharing this writing prompt entry with us. I enjoy reading your posts and this one is no different. This is a good write. The only problem I see is you switch back and forth with POV without notifying your reader. You can't do that, you can switch POV but you need to notify your readers first. I use *****.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Thank you Barbara, I count on you for your reviews, I learn a lot.
Correct me if I misunderstood your point. When changing POV it is helpful to place ***** between paragraphs as if introducing a new mini-chapter. Correcto-mundo?
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Yes, or you can use whatever you like, just let your readers know.