Wilderness Redemption Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "Take Me to the River"Shenanigans on the frontier
12 total reviews
Comment from robyn corum
Earl,
I feel like a big collision is near. YIKES. I have no idea what is about to happen, but I feel it is getting closer and I'm a bit worried about who might survive it.
Some notes, if I may:
1.) Aw Hell, I wuz never good at my sums.'
"Ten dollars."
--> I think this is the same guy talking so these should be in the same paragraph
2.) you were to watch for the whites who want to build a trading post(.)"
Good job!
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reply by the author on 29-Mar-2021
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Earl,
I feel like a big collision is near. YIKES. I have no idea what is about to happen, but I feel it is getting closer and I'm a bit worried about who might survive it.
Some notes, if I may:
1.) Aw Hell, I wuz never good at my sums.'
"Ten dollars."
--> I think this is the same guy talking so these should be in the same paragraph
2.) you were to watch for the whites who want to build a trading post(.)"
Good job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2021
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Thank you very much for sticking with my story and the editing tips Robyn. I appreciate you taking the time to read and review my story.
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No problem, buddy. I enjoy it!
Comment from Sally Law
First, it's really great to see this!! Over doo! I just had to say that. ;) This is marvelous! I enjoyed it from beginning to end.
A few improvements for your consideration.
-"What's goin' on, Godfrey? Are we going to be here long," she asked.
"...Independence. He's a good man." Period after independence, then start a new sentence.
I hope this is helpful and adds to your fine work. Hurry back!
Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs...
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reply by the author on 29-Mar-2021
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First, it's really great to see this!! Over doo! I just had to say that. ;) This is marvelous! I enjoyed it from beginning to end.
A few improvements for your consideration.
-"What's goin' on, Godfrey? Are we going to be here long," she asked.
"...Independence. He's a good man." Period after independence, then start a new sentence.
I hope this is helpful and adds to your fine work. Hurry back!
Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs...
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2021
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Thank you very much for sticking with my story and the editing tips Sal. I appreciate you taking the time to read and review my story.
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You are most welcome! Sal :))