Comment from Sandra du Plessis

Excellent

A very well-written children's motivational poem about the biggest pumpkin rolling away from the patch having a ball. She becomes the best pumpkin pie the people eat fir decades.

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021

Thanks so very much ......these are a little goofy, but fun to stick together......Godspeed and Best Wishes going forward......Stu Harrell

Comment from Boogienights

Excellent

This is delightful. It's nice that she became a pie, but wouldn't it have been cool if she became a Jill o lantern?..lol. Thanks so much for sharing and good luck in the contest. :)

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2021

Thanks so much.....you are right.....I thought about Jill O Lantern but decided to myth her up like Frosty..... Godspeed and Best Wishes....Stu Harrell

Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose

Excellent

Hello anonymous

Great entry for the Kiddies motivational poem writing prompt contest. It's the kind of poem that would appeal to children with good rhythm and a positive story behind the poem.

A story about a pumpkin is such a great idea...so cute.

Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2021

Thanks so very much....these are fun to cobble together here and there......Godspeed to you and yours and Good Luck going forward..
Stu Harrell

Comment from Susan Louise Gabriel

Excellent

So cute! And I love the way you ended it! I had a bad feeling about a pumpkin rolling down a hill and getting baked into a pie, and dang, if that wasn't what happened! But the part about Frosty was brilliant!
Thank you for sharing!
Susan

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2021

Thank you so very much...You are exactly right....I didn't want poor Sweet Pea just squished up for Holiday dessert....so I needed to give her a fanciful layer of myth.....Godspeed and Best wishes to you going forward....Stu Harrell

Comment from Wendy G

Excellent

That is a rollicking poem, filled with energy and verve, so I imagine that little kids would love it. The rhyme and metre suit your choice of topic. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2021

Thanks so very much......these are fun to bash together.....not for the purists as they say....but a good time.....Best Wishes to you and yours

Comment from Liz O'Neill

Excellent

I noticed you included a regional dialect. It makes me remember a story my 6th graders had. They were supposed to read & find a difference between their dialect and the one spoken in the story. The irony is that it was an Appalachian dialect and my students in Vermont spoke the same dialect. Needless to say, they saw no difference. You use of a regional dialect makes it all inclusive for the kid who might read it.

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2021

Thanks so much....you are right...the southern dialect "Reckon how come ya'll ain't been comin' to church"? actually came from Northern England in the late 17th Century....Godspeed to you and yours....

reply by Liz O'Neill on 17-Jan-2021

My kids spke in the dialect with what I learned is the a-verb and no g. "I seen him a-comin' and he was a-grumblin'. You keep runnin your mouth and I'm goin' a smack you upside the head. That's a little of it.

Comment from equestrik

Excellent

This is clever and fun and creative, it is fun and has good rhythm and cadence. I do ove pumpkin pie myself! I wish you all the best in the upcoming contest.

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2021

Thank you so much .....these are fun to fiddle with ....I enjoy the little slapdash verses......Best Wishes to you going forward....

Comment from Teri7

Excellent

A Song for Sweet pea is a really cute and very well written poem you have penned for the Kiddies Motivational Poem. You used very good descriptive words and very good imagery from your words. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. Best wishes in the contest. Blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2021

Thanks so much for your kind thoughts.......Best Wishes to you going forward....

Comment from Jannypan (Jan)

Excellent

Your contest entry was fun to read, Mystery Author. The lines read smooth with a great story. I like the use of rhyme although I can't identify a certain style with it. But it matter not. I can see this as a children's book. Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 15-Jan-2021

Thanks you very much.....you are right....these are a little bumpy, lumpy.....but fun nonetheless.....Godspeed and Best Wishes

reply by Jannypan (Jan) on 15-Jan-2021

All's good!
It is the last verse that loses the rhyme.
May I suggest ~
Now 'tween the kittens and mittens
Don't you dare e'er dismay
[Don't you fear to be smitten]
For like her best pal Frosty
She'll be back again some day.
[She'll be back--just wait and see.]

[back and again say pretty much the same thing

Comment from royowen

Excellent

This is a very cute entry in this contest my friend. It's articulate and quirky, very lyrical and smoothish, and general couplet rhyming, all important ingredients in this manner of writing and poems for kids, but an evenness in the meter would help, well done, blessings

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2021

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reply by the author on 15-Jan-2021

My Dear Sir........Thanks so very much......you are right .....these are a little chippy choppy.......but fun to bang together.....Godspeed to you and yours....

reply by royowen on 15-Jan-2021

Bless you