Football - A Novel
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "Football Chapter 9 part 2"A mother faces life's struggles.
26 total reviews
Comment from judiverse
Great details about moving all the boxes and things. Moving is something dreadful. She should sue the moving company if they were expected to unpack and arrange furniture. The crew that helped certainly deserved that pizza. Fun bit about the dust ruffle. I hope Katherine will get settled in without further problems. Now there's still the problem of that cat. Don't worry about the length. Let Katherine show she can take care of things without Gabriel butting in! judi
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Great details about moving all the boxes and things. Moving is something dreadful. She should sue the moving company if they were expected to unpack and arrange furniture. The crew that helped certainly deserved that pizza. Fun bit about the dust ruffle. I hope Katherine will get settled in without further problems. Now there's still the problem of that cat. Don't worry about the length. Let Katherine show she can take care of things without Gabriel butting in! judi
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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The cat will come up later. Thank you for the kind review.
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You're welcome. The accusation at her dog killing the neighbor's cat makes me wonder if there's another threat to Katherine coming. judi
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Barbara.wilkey,
Although I've missed some pieces, yet it makes no difference because your style of presentation is so catchy that I'm again in the main stream, and find it worth enjoying.
Lucid as well as perfectly matching the theme phraseology, captivating flow up to "Good night."
Interesting, Indeed!
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Hello Barbara.wilkey,
Although I've missed some pieces, yet it makes no difference because your style of presentation is so catchy that I'm again in the main stream, and find it worth enjoying.
Lucid as well as perfectly matching the theme phraseology, captivating flow up to "Good night."
Interesting, Indeed!
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Thank you the encouragement.
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Barbara.Wilkey, Most Welcome!
With best wishes,
~ RP
Comment from AJ McCall
Www, they're so sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet! I was smiling the entire time I was reading this. People helping others always make me feel good. And Gabriel and Katherine... well let's say some things are already happening, lol. I can't wait to read the next chapter! Hope you had a lovely New Year's and Sunday!
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Www, they're so sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet! I was smiling the entire time I was reading this. People helping others always make me feel good. And Gabriel and Katherine... well let's say some things are already happening, lol. I can't wait to read the next chapter! Hope you had a lovely New Year's and Sunday!
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Thank you the encouragement.
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You're welcome!
Comment from Jay Squires
Good reading! You always write such entertaining chapters.
A few things:
Katherine chewed her lower lip. [Barbara, I don't want to be nitpicky, but you really should investigate other ways of expressing discontent/anxiety/fear, etc. I noticed it in previous chapters but didn't mention it, thinking it wouldn't recur that much. But it has. Just about every chapter. Please don't be angry.]
After the pizza delivery, worked stopped [ ... WORK stopped.]
He held out his hand. "Give your phone." [Give (ME?) your phone.]
Geez, I like Gabriel. He and Katherine make a cute couple.
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Good reading! You always write such entertaining chapters.
A few things:
Katherine chewed her lower lip. [Barbara, I don't want to be nitpicky, but you really should investigate other ways of expressing discontent/anxiety/fear, etc. I noticed it in previous chapters but didn't mention it, thinking it wouldn't recur that much. But it has. Just about every chapter. Please don't be angry.]
After the pizza delivery, worked stopped [ ... WORK stopped.]
He held out his hand. "Give your phone." [Give (ME?) your phone.]
Geez, I like Gabriel. He and Katherine make a cute couple.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Thank you for the help. I made the changes and will come up with a better idea than chewed on her lower lip.
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I think we all have our pet stock phrases, ones that just fit. And we're the last to see it in ourselves. That's why I was hoping I wouldn't be offending you by pointing it out.
Comment from Gert sherwood
ello Barb
Smiles to you being such a great narrator of took place on moving day. There were so many times while you were telling us about ---
When Gabriel made me smile here is one of them---
Wen he touched Katherine's cheek she said; Gabriel "It's only slightly bruised. I'm sure you can cover it with make-up." then he held her badly bruised hand and shook his head. "There's no hope for your hand. It may be really sore in the morning." Romance in the future?
Gert
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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ello Barb
Smiles to you being such a great narrator of took place on moving day. There were so many times while you were telling us about ---
When Gabriel made me smile here is one of them---
Wen he touched Katherine's cheek she said; Gabriel "It's only slightly bruised. I'm sure you can cover it with make-up." then he held her badly bruised hand and shook his head. "There's no hope for your hand. It may be really sore in the morning." Romance in the future?
Gert
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Thank you the encouragement.
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You are so welcome Barb
Comment from w.j.debi
Whew! I am tired just reading about all the work that went into getting things in their correct rooms and the beds put together. The coaches and the boys were certainly a lot of help. Now for a good night's sleep.
The characters, especially Gabe and Katherine, are endearing and believable.
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Whew! I am tired just reading about all the work that went into getting things in their correct rooms and the beds put together. The coaches and the boys were certainly a lot of help. Now for a good night's sleep.
The characters, especially Gabe and Katherine, are endearing and believable.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Thank you the encouragement.
Comment from Sankey
This was a full on, great chapter. I still wanna know if Frost had anything to do with the movers? Only a couple of areas to look at.After the pizza delivery, work[ed] stopped
The "gottens"need work... I couldn't have gotten everything inside before it rained. There's no way I would've gotten the bed frames made."
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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This was a full on, great chapter. I still wanna know if Frost had anything to do with the movers? Only a couple of areas to look at.After the pizza delivery, work[ed] stopped
The "gottens"need work... I couldn't have gotten everything inside before it rained. There's no way I would've gotten the bed frames made."
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Thank you for the kind review and you are correct about the gotten, but it's dialogue and the way they speak in Texas.
Comment from lancellot
Perfect chapter. As I was reading I thought this is the type of community we all secretly wish we had.
Note:
["]What?"
"I'm pretty sure you have a few choice names for me."
- add
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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Perfect chapter. As I was reading I thought this is the type of community we all secretly wish we had.
Note:
["]What?"
"I'm pretty sure you have a few choice names for me."
- add
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jan-2021
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I added the " I have seen this community, but to me honest mostly within a military community. People just help other because there's nobody else. Now, when my two younger boys played football, one while in South Carolina, and one here in Texas, the football community did pull together. It's its own little cult.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Barbara, it's wonderfully written and you do know that I love this story. It isalso very well written. So now I wonder where all this is taking us.
Only a small thing: He scanned area. = he scanned the area. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Hi Barbara, it's wonderfully written and you do know that I love this story. It isalso very well written. So now I wonder where all this is taking us.
Only a small thing: He scanned area. = he scanned the area. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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I just fixed it. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Rdfrdmom2
Barbara:
What's wrong with this picture: it's snowing in Texas and we cannot
get any snow here on the part of the East Coast where I live (VA/NC
border by the Atlantic Ocean)?
I am thoroughly enjoying your current novel. I have to wonder if
Katherine's four boys are going to be over-protective of their mom
or if the fact that Gabriel is not only the high school football
coach and a former NFL defensive lineman will give him all the
clearance he needs to eventually date their mom?
Rdfrdmom2
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Barbara:
What's wrong with this picture: it's snowing in Texas and we cannot
get any snow here on the part of the East Coast where I live (VA/NC
border by the Atlantic Ocean)?
I am thoroughly enjoying your current novel. I have to wonder if
Katherine's four boys are going to be over-protective of their mom
or if the fact that Gabriel is not only the high school football
coach and a former NFL defensive lineman will give him all the
clearance he needs to eventually date their mom?
Rdfrdmom2
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Hmmm, will have to wait and see. Thank you for th kind review.