Those Parents
Times have changed19 total reviews
Comment from rouskin
It really deserves to be a winner Congratulations ! Very well written story. I love the humor Most enjoyable Really well done Blessings, Rouskin
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2014
It really deserves to be a winner Congratulations ! Very well written story. I love the humor Most enjoyable Really well done Blessings, Rouskin
Comment Written 11-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2014
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Thank you very much. It was a fun contest with many good entries.
Comment from country ranch writer
the parents need a trip out to the barn to have a parent talk you know what I mean! It is rude to bring kids to a family place they know will be the meal from hell.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2014
the parents need a trip out to the barn to have a parent talk you know what I mean! It is rude to bring kids to a family place they know will be the meal from hell.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2014
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Thank you very much
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welcome
Comment from BunnyS
I think we have been seated next to that family more than once!! Made my blood boil just reading it! Sorry the night didn't turn out as planned... Sure made me appreciate my own, well behaved kids! Loved the line about the son not having a limp! That was classy! Very clever, sad but too often true, story! Great job!
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
I think we have been seated next to that family more than once!! Made my blood boil just reading it! Sorry the night didn't turn out as planned... Sure made me appreciate my own, well behaved kids! Loved the line about the son not having a limp! That was classy! Very clever, sad but too often true, story! Great job!
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Shirley B
I love this story. I am with you. Of course my son is 28 now and I guess I am old fashioned and I was from a different generation. He knew how to act in public. I loved your imagery. I think we have all been there when kids have acted this way. Best of luck in the contest, Shirley
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
I love this story. I am with you. Of course my son is 28 now and I guess I am old fashioned and I was from a different generation. He knew how to act in public. I loved your imagery. I think we have all been there when kids have acted this way. Best of luck in the contest, Shirley
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you, Shirley. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Hey, buster! YOU try dealing with my kids and see how YOU make out! I had to call an exorcist twice last week for my daughter, and both of them ran out screaming! But this is an accurate portrayal of our night out, and however rude and offensive, it is well written, so I cannot justify the two stars I'm tempted to give you.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Hey, buster! YOU try dealing with my kids and see how YOU make out! I had to call an exorcist twice last week for my daughter, and both of them ran out screaming! But this is an accurate portrayal of our night out, and however rude and offensive, it is well written, so I cannot justify the two stars I'm tempted to give you.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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LOL, Thank you very much.
Comment from Winslow
Dear Writer,
A funny descriptive story of how parents handle their kids. I pity the author because of his wife's respond to not responding. (LOL) I think you did a good job of using the words in your story.
This could be improved by tightening and you overuse was.
For instance this is a suggested edit for this section:
Next to our table was another little family out for dinner. There were two young parents, a boy, maybe five-years-old and a girl, I?ll guess seven. From the moment we sat down, things started to get hectic. (Excuse my language, but wait, you?ll understand. I think this is unnecessary. Let the reader make up his own mind.
When the mom said, ?in public? I almost choked on my cheesy biscuits. (They are great by the way. This doesn't add anything and doesn't advance your story)I looked at the father who had his head buried in his cell phone pretending to be blind and deaf.
Good luck in the contest.
Warm regards,
Winslow
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Dear Writer,
A funny descriptive story of how parents handle their kids. I pity the author because of his wife's respond to not responding. (LOL) I think you did a good job of using the words in your story.
This could be improved by tightening and you overuse was.
For instance this is a suggested edit for this section:
Next to our table was another little family out for dinner. There were two young parents, a boy, maybe five-years-old and a girl, I?ll guess seven. From the moment we sat down, things started to get hectic. (Excuse my language, but wait, you?ll understand. I think this is unnecessary. Let the reader make up his own mind.
When the mom said, ?in public? I almost choked on my cheesy biscuits. (They are great by the way. This doesn't add anything and doesn't advance your story)I looked at the father who had his head buried in his cell phone pretending to be blind and deaf.
Good luck in the contest.
Warm regards,
Winslow
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you, Winslow, for the great review and the excellent suggestions.
Comment from Cariboubill
Very realistic. We've all been there. Good writing. The story rolls along so well I was not aware of the required words being worked into the scheme. Every so often I read something that I wish I had written. This was one of those times.
It also explains some of the low star reviews that happen!
...Bill
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Very realistic. We've all been there. Good writing. The story rolls along so well I was not aware of the required words being worked into the scheme. Every so often I read something that I wish I had written. This was one of those times.
It also explains some of the low star reviews that happen!
...Bill
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you very much. I was a little worried people wouldn't see the humor in it.
Comment from Spiritual Echo
This I hysterical and wonderful. It was so smooth, using all the words in the prompt so seamlessly that I had to go back and actually look for them to ensure you followed the rules.
Great story. I have absolutely no doubt that I've read your stories before with the same appreciative nod for both writing and sheer entertainment.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
This I hysterical and wonderful. It was so smooth, using all the words in the prompt so seamlessly that I had to go back and actually look for them to ensure you followed the rules.
Great story. I have absolutely no doubt that I've read your stories before with the same appreciative nod for both writing and sheer entertainment.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you very much. Your great review and generous words mean a lot to me.
Comment from James Chaima Phiri
This story doesn't deserve 3 stars. You were just given a few words to use in a story but immediately your mind created such a scenario. This is excellent. The parents need some sort of counseling. Kindly consider editing this: 1.his head buried in his cell phone(.) He was... 2.this miserable child is about (to) die,
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
This story doesn't deserve 3 stars. You were just given a few words to use in a story but immediately your mind created such a scenario. This is excellent. The parents need some sort of counseling. Kindly consider editing this: 1.his head buried in his cell phone(.) He was... 2.this miserable child is about (to) die,
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you very much. I really appreciate the review and the edits. I always miss a few.
Comment from Judy Couch
Your story is well told. We have all had similar experiences. I, for one, think someone should have told the parents to take their brats home and feed them oatmeal for supper.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
Your story is well told. We have all had similar experiences. I, for one, think someone should have told the parents to take their brats home and feed them oatmeal for supper.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2014
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Thank you. I kind of like Oatmeal, especially with sugar and butter.