His Silence
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "His Silence - Chapter Twenty"Why did a 14 year old boy murder his parents?
7 total reviews
Comment from Neonewman
Jacob, you have a way of building tension, my friend. My muscles didn't relax until the end. This is another great chapter. This story is coming together nicely.
God bless,
Steve
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2024
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Jacob, you have a way of building tension, my friend. My muscles didn't relax until the end. This is another great chapter. This story is coming together nicely.
God bless,
Steve
Comment Written 10-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2024
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Thank you, Steve, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This chapter points out a couple of fairly odd things for this 'commune' type group, that the doors are locked, and no photographs seem to be allowed, or at least not new ones.
Suggestion on a small fix:
I'm sure Mum thinks something more is going on between me and Callum than there actually is, we're just friends nothing more than that.
I would put the word 'but' in front of 'we're just friends' due to having two independent clauses there.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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This chapter points out a couple of fairly odd things for this 'commune' type group, that the doors are locked, and no photographs seem to be allowed, or at least not new ones.
Suggestion on a small fix:
I'm sure Mum thinks something more is going on between me and Callum than there actually is, we're just friends nothing more than that.
I would put the word 'but' in front of 'we're just friends' due to having two independent clauses there.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Thank you, I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
It is very odd that all the doors are locked. The people at the table seem to be just everyday people, but that isn't the way Danielle thinks of them. Her parents' history in this house adds up to a lot of questions.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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It is very odd that all the doors are locked. The people at the table seem to be just everyday people, but that isn't the way Danielle thinks of them. Her parents' history in this house adds up to a lot of questions.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Thank you Carol, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Distinctly creepy! So well done, Jacob, for creating this imposing atmosphere. That long corridor was particularly vividly described. I somehow think this won't be the only night Danielle and Callum stay there if they want to learn more. One edit: I try to work out what it is the(y're) talking about.
Another good one, thanks. Debbie
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Distinctly creepy! So well done, Jacob, for creating this imposing atmosphere. That long corridor was particularly vividly described. I somehow think this won't be the only night Danielle and Callum stay there if they want to learn more. One edit: I try to work out what it is the(y're) talking about.
Another good one, thanks. Debbie
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Thank you Debbie, I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from BethShelby
I would think Callum would be anxious to leave but Danielle hasn't learned that much so far and she doesn't want to leave without learning more. It is surprising that all the rooms are locked. I wonder if they have separate rooms available.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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I would think Callum would be anxious to leave but Danielle hasn't learned that much so far and she doesn't want to leave without learning more. It is surprising that all the rooms are locked. I wonder if they have separate rooms available.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Thank you Beth, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Begin Again
You've got some strange people there, Jacob! No way would I be staying in that house. I half expected Danielle's adopted parents to be slaughtered or something and no one would answer the phone. I guess I just wait and see what you have to offer...Good job!
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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You've got some strange people there, Jacob! No way would I be staying in that house. I half expected Danielle's adopted parents to be slaughtered or something and no one would answer the phone. I guess I just wait and see what you have to offer...Good job!
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Carol, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Danielle senses something is wrong with this place but doesn't want to believe it. I look forward to reading more.
he's sitting a few chairs away, next to the woman who first spoke to me earlier (away, beside the woman)
Did they home school Harvey and I? 'I guess I struggled to fit (Harvey and me?)
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Danielle senses something is wrong with this place but doesn't want to believe it. I look forward to reading more.
he's sitting a few chairs away, next to the woman who first spoke to me earlier (away, beside the woman)
Did they home school Harvey and I? 'I guess I struggled to fit (Harvey and me?)
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2024
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Thank you Barbara, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.