The Attitude - Part 3

Part 2 Synopsis - Cynthia finds out from her dad that a college scout is coming to her next game. She is excited but nervous. Later, at home, she becomes more nervous about why everyone seems to be against her and about the scout coming to her game, so she takes some of dad's Xanax pills which she has been using to help her sleep at night. The next day at school, Cynthia accuses Becca of not having her back. She then spends the rest of the day, anxiously waiting for game night. When she finally goes to sixth period athletics, Becca meets her at the dressing room door and tells her that Coach Hall wants to see her.

Cynthia knocked three times on Coach Hall's office door and waited. I hope I don't have to listen to one of her long lectures.  When she heard the stern invitation to enter, she took a deep breath and walked in.

Coach Hall was sitting at her desk, staring down at her clipboard.  Cynthia sat down in a straightback chair; chewing on her fingernails and staring at a wall of trophies, she waited. Finally, Coach Hall looked up and exhaled a long sigh.

"Well, Cee...you know why you're here, right?" Cynthia shrugged her shoulders and made  her  'I don't have a clue'  face. "Okay..." Coach Hall continued. "Let me just lay it out there for you. You've been slacking off in practice, so you will NOT be in the starting line up tonight."

Biting down on her lower lip, Cynthia stared down at her feet.  Her ears burned hot and her eyes watered.  Don't let me cry...don't let her see me cry.  With white knuckles gripping her chair seat, she looked up with pleading eyes. "Coach...that's not fair. You know I always come through during a game.  And besides... there's a scout from the Lady Vols... coming to see me play...I need to be on the court...please!"

Coach Hall raised her eyebrows and shook her head.  "I'm sorry, but I've made my decision. If and when you get off the bench tonight will be determined by your attitude. The team comes first, Cee."

As Cynthia made her way to the locker room, she felt like her head was going to explode. She shoved the door open, kicked her locker, and yelled through gritted teeth, "Arrrrggg...why me...why?" Massaging her temples, she scanned the empty dressing room.  At least everyone else is out on the court shooting.   She sat down on the bench and grabbed her cellphone; then she laid it back down. I can't call Dad...what will I say...he'll be so mad ...and Tom, the scout...what will he think?   She grabbed her chest; her heart was pounding. Breathe, dang it, just breathe.  With shaky hands, she dug down in her bag and pulled out the bottle of Xanax.  I've got to get a grip.  She flipped off the top and didn't hear Becca open the dressing room door.

"Cee, what are you doing?"  

Cynthia, startled by the tone of Becca's voice, dropped the bottle, and little oval orange pills spilled onto the floor. "Nothing...I've got a headache, that's all," she said as she tried to pick up all the pills.

"Here, you missed one," Becca said as she examined it closely. "You and I both know that Xanax isn't a headache pill."  She sat down and placed her hand on Cynthia's shoulder.  "Come on, Cee, what's going on here?"

Cynthia looked at Becca with wrinkled brow and desperate eyes. Then the floodgates broke open and she sobbed. "My life is crap...I'm not starting...I may not even play...and my dad has a scout coming to watch...everyone's mad at me...even you...I'm just sick of it!." 

Becca got some tissue from the bathroom stall and handed it to Cynthia to blow her nose.  "I knew you were struggling, but I had no idea you felt so bad.  And Cee, I'm not mad at you, just worried, especially seeing you with these pills. Maybe you're putting too much pressure on yourself...basketball used to be fun, remember?"

Cynthia sniffed her nose and nodded. "Well...it doesn't matter now. I've screwed up big time."

Becca took the pill bottle from Cynthia's hand.  "Well, these have to go." She marched over to the commode, emptied the bottle and flushed. "We'll talk more about this later," she said as she threw the bottle in the trash.   "But right now, just concentrate on the game tonight..the team needs you, whether you're on the court or not."